Gambling because of my issues

Been gambling since I turned 13 years of old age.As my father use to be alcoholic and gambler he taught me how to gamble.From very early age 13 years of age I started visiting bookies with him,looking for him in town centre around casinos and pubs to get him home almost every day so I was aware of gambling,sport betting since then.

It started spiraling once I turned 18 and got myself a job.Often I didn't pay my rent or by any food at all and was literally crying my eyes out because I had no food I shelves whatsoever and had nothing to eat for 3 or 4 days,starving.

My sister helped me out a lot to basically survive.

Then relationships,lies,loans,borrowing from people you name it just to get my hand on any cash I could to feed my gambling habit.

All relationships have broke up as any gambler can't last with his lies,lacks of emotions,and self-love.

To this day I am 38 years old and I struggled with heavy stammer since about 30 years of age and it had massive impact on my health.

Not sure if stammer started because of long term gambling issues and it's something psychological because of it.

Use to be a healthy kid/man until that age so not really sure.

Depressions,anxiety,self blame,lack of self empathy you name it comes with it

I wished I never learned how to gamble in my early childhood so I always use to blame my father for it

Maybe it's in genes I thought ?who knows 

One thing I know it destroyed my life and change way of perspective that I had on life any visions that I could thought of are lost forever 

Anyways I've got roof over my head,paying all my debts,buying food and still gambling losing every penny that it's spare after I get paid and pay everything off.