I Need to talk to someone

Hi again A;lex :)) .

Health issues and anxiety can all be related to gambling and now as you say on top of which you feel you have nothing behind you for emergency's.

I had probably 20k of debt when I finally threw in the towel and all of it gambling related , at first I loked on it as a huge mountain which I would never be rid of but began setting out a plan to pay back an affordable amount each month , I still have some now but I'm actually quite happy it's there these day's as it shows me how far I've come an dalso affords me the opportunity to realise how bad it did get at one point .

You can do the same with saving again , watching those savings grow day by day will spur you on again ? and if you can save 10k in a year then wow ! ... what's the problem ?

If the anxiety is troubling you or you feel depressed then you need to make an appointment with your GP and talk things over , tell him of your gambling he's not going to be judgemental but he will be able to refer you for some help not to mentions giving you something for any condition you may have .

The helps there my friend but you have to ask and make it known your struggling ............... the suicidal thoughts are because youve been in panic mode over the money ............ don't be ashamed , I was also there with those thought but they wont be there forever , I realise now that I didn't want to end my life I just wanted to stop feeling the way I was .

It's a temporary state my friend and nothing else :))

Keep talking to people and reach out for help .

Have you spoken to the helpline / family / friend's or the Samaritans if you need someone now ? All there to help buddy but your the one that has to reach out :)) .

All the best :))

Thank you Alan and everyone else. I will listen to your advice as it’s reassuring to know that you’ve gone through the same feelings. I will put in physical blocks to prevent this ever happening again. I will put this in the past and stay strong, gradually moving forward. I really hope I will overcome this - and as difficult as it is - will try and just forget about what’s happened. I hope i can continue with my current job and put on a brave face while staying in the job for years to come. I just hope no one goes through this - i wouldn’t wish it upon anyone. it’s the worst feeling in the world. although this is the most i’ve lost in one go - it was not the first time i have done this which leads me to be sure that I have a problem. every time i have done this i’ve lost big amounts.

I just hope no one goes through this and stays well away from gambling. Its the worst thing ever and the feeling after a loss is undescrible.

34 is not old man.. you have another 30 years to work to retire.. and some people work even after that if in good health and have to. 9.5 K is not big deal for person your age.. its not a million, its just money for a nice car.. the thing is, life goes on.. your account will start growing once you start earning. Just an expensive lesson

Staying on 0 for life's surely a better thing :))

But this is the thing - I don’t wanna be a gambler - If I was then I no longer want to be. I don’t think about gambling or want to gamble - it’s just in this instance as with previous times - Injust went in there for a laugh. I was off work and haven’t gambled in over a year. but each time i go in for ‘a laugh’ i lose eveything - I don’t stop until I clear out my account which is a very dangerous thing. I mean I don’t want a life like this - so I need to not gamble - Ever!!

forget blockers and stuff - I just can’t gamble ever! not even for a laugh - not even for a pound - not for nothing!!!

if someone doesn’t learn a lesson after losing this much - i’m sorry but they will never learn - i’m so upset with myself!!!

Alex , I'm actually not sure anymore what it is you want to do ? .

In my humble experience it's not about how many times you gamble in a year , daily , weekly or monthly really doesn't matter , what matters is that youv'e said that once you go out and gamble you don't stop untill you clear out your account ? , that's compulsive my friend and just like all of us addicts on here you clearly have no off switch .

In your first post you said how you'd lost 3k in the bookies first , then when that had gone you rushed home and took a further 4.5 k out and stayed in the casino till 4am ? , now forgive me if I'm wrong but that's making a calculated choice to go back when you'd already had a hiding and not going out with your mates once a year .

Some people come here looking for truthfull answers and many don't like or refuse to belive what's beeing told to them and I'm not sure which catogorie you fit into if I'm honest ?

You sound as if you really don't want to stop gambling just stop losing when you do go out ? .

Youv'e already dissmissed the Blocks " Forget blockers and stuff " in your last post but by joining sense which self excludes at your local casino it would make you unable to gamble in any casino in the land ? .

I'm gonna leave it there now Alex , I wish you well mate but until we take responsability for our own actions there's little I can say .

All the best for now .

beleive me the feeling of upset stomach will pass with time. The people hooked on gambling share some mutual characteristics. Everyone that relapsed felt sick before and stopped for a month or two, I mean even if you wanted to gamble every day you wouldnt have the money. Because we blow everything in few hours. Thats why some people are saying to protect yourself. They speak from experience. I, myself like you say, didnt put anything to protect myself, I have been gamble free for 222 days. Its only when you dont gamble that YOU win. To be honest even if I wanted to gamble now I cant. I moved to switzerland, and here is no betting shops in the country, I only have card that can be used in switzerland. I cant deposit on internet. But if I decide I can find a way, I can go to germany or france. But believe me you will get better with time. You are still in a lot of stress after loosing that amount in so short. It happened to me the same thing, I just couldnt stop. It's a bit harder to stop gambling in the UK, there are betting shops on every corner And there are so many people gambling. But you have to be determined. I am not originally from the UK. I lived there for 3 years and lost everything that I saved and then I stopped. after that I was working two jobs and after 6 months with two jobs I have saved the same amount of money I have saved with 2 and a half years of working. Wish you all the best. Do not forget you are young and have plenty of time in front of you. I am 28, if we stop and never gamble till the rest of our lives, I am sure at the end of this journey called life, whether you have 10 or 15 k more or less on the account wont really matter, because you gonna have a lot more money. So dont dwell on your losses and dont let them to make you gamble again, not even for a pound.

Wish you all the best.

PS: give it time and keep busy

Best regards the dude

Giving up gambling Alex means everything, no bookies, scratchcards, slots, lotto tickets, casinos.. Everything from the day you stop. You hold on to that pain long enough to stop you going into debt, stop you getting loans.

Alex, you need to speak to someone via helpline number at the main page of this site. You do need to put in gambling blocks. Listen to what they are saying to you. To stop your addiction you have to put blocks into place. Contact the casino for a lifetime ban, the bookies too. Otherwise you will fall back into just one more won't harm. I am 120 days gamble free. I had suicidal thoughts. I lost all that I had. I didn't lose the amount you did but it was a painful loss nonetheless. Its a tough battle to stop gambling, there is no cure to stopping you hurt, or to stop your anger or anxiety. You can however understand that gambling is a illness, a disease that affects your health and well-being mentally and physically.

Alex you firstly have to forgive yourself and forget the money. I have saved ВЈ120 I've put away £1 every night I haven't gambled. I to had those thoughts but 4 month later those thoughts are miles away.

Your not to old to start saving.

You can put a brave face on and face work, say you are having trouble with your ex (no one needs to know what it is) ex life.

Understand the demons in our minds that push buttons to make us lose it all will fight you every step. Took 28 days before that feeling was manageable, where I could switch TV on or handle seeing adverts.

Ring helpline, ask for help, set up a diary, put the blocks into place. Because right now you need the strength to mourn the loss of the money you earned, its easier with the blocks, your strength will grow.
Alex, look online at the fellas that have been millionaires lost it all and then earned it all back and more. Look up Tony Robbins he did a wrong deal and lost millions and now he's worth billions. Watch his motivation videos and learn about great men who lost it all and became richer men. It can happen.

Just be kinder to yourself and good luck at work.

Bella xx

Hi alex im totally new to this site but i had one of ur moments on saturday and every month for the last 2/3 yrs decided enoughs enough now but ur story made me think. You sound so sad n lost n thats exactly how i feel. I hope u start feeling better about urself soon ur still young enuff to rebuild savings x x

Mate listen to the Advice, I've gambled on and off for longer than I care to remember. I don't think about gambling everyday, I can go months without betting and can block it out my head but when I fall I fall hard, think the most I lost on a short time '2hrs' was about 40k. I'm not rich by any stretch of the imagination, what I am is compulsive, don't know when to get out! Hate getting beat, think I'm smarter than the dealer/bookie and can get myself out of the mess only to go in deeper.
I read something that says only 7% of compulsive gamblers ever manage to stop gambling, pretty low statistics.. If you feel ill now imagine losing what some people on this site has lost! Some people didn't make it to this site and became a different statistic.
Do yourself a favour, put blocks in place and try to be in that 7%

That’s a very depressing statistic! My fiancГ© has just started recovery and we are getting married in June. He is doing everything he can to recover - attending meetings , blocked all sites, handed over his finances to me and is attending CBT. Can you give me any other advise for him to help beat this ?! I will stand by him as long as he does right by himself! Thanks in advance for any advise!

Hi Hope89

All the measures your fiance has put in place is the way forward, I don't know how your fiance would gamble but blocks are key to stopping it.

Myself it would be boredom or escapism that would tempt me, filling that time with something else would help whether it's taking up a hobby or focusing on something else.

Change passwords on accounts! maybe getting a cash card for the account he/she uses. Call credit cards etc and ask them not to accept gambling transactions. Monitor accounts daily maybe using banking apps. Free counselling is available, I personally don't like GA however the support network for partners is good. The reason I don't like it personally is I feel its a constant reminder when i want to forget but it works for people and is an option.

Be in control, monitor regularly and fill the time! I would always try and find a way to be by myself in order to gamble, you need to watch for that.

Best of luck