Hi all,
It's my first time on here and if I'm honest I'm not really sure what to say exactly. I guess I should start with a reality check with myself...I'm a 27 stay at home mum who is addicted to online slots and robs from peter to pay Paul every month so my partner doesn't find out.
It started off as something small I've always liked going to ***** bingo to try my luck and have a few drinks and it was never a problem. Then I had my children my eldest when I was living in a different town to my friends and family and I got really depressed and lonely. I barely left the house for 2 years even after we'd moved back, I literally lived in Pajamas all the time.
Well I was bored one day and I'd got an email saying try this slot for 100% cash match bonus ( I've since learnt these are all pretty much worthless) so I gave it a go. It was average really I hardly deposited much as I didn't seem to win much. Then one day I'd won a little bit and decided to try my luck upping the stakes and I managed to win 1300 I was absolutely over the moon, I decorated our home and it paid for a nice weekend away for me and my partner ( I was starting to get back to normal depression wise) well I can honestly say this is the worst thing that ever happened to me. After that point I was always looking for the big win and my idea of big was getting higher, I've lost my appreciation for money.
I've done self exclusions on all the sites I use and then just find new ones. I owe my dad 3000 which is basically due to gambling and he's tried to help me out so my bf doesn't find out, he even did it last month before I went to portugal for 2 weeks and didn't even think about gambling and then the day I get back I think oh I'll have a flutter 'try my luck' and it's like I'm not even on this planet! With 150 I won 1200 and spent the whole lot without withdrawing any! And then I go and spend a 1000 on another site because the first ones deposit limits are met trying to win it back! I had to take a ******** loan out to pay the bills which I have no idea how im going to pay back without Andy ever finding out and then to top it off yesterday with 90 I won 2300 and also didn't take any out!!?!!? What is wrong with me what am I looking for from it? Sitting here awake all night I can see that 2k is a lot of money it would've been the answer to my prayers and still left me 1000 to do stuff with my kids but it's like when that laptop is on I don't even know what I want from it? I go to bingo and sometimes spend too much well more then I should but I think when it's real money in your hand it's easier to manage then when you're playing online and can't see the money your spending until your bank balance says zero
I just can't seem to stop chasing the buzz I don't know if it's because I'm not working so not earning I only get what he gives me I just wanted to contribute to my family like the first win and soon I won't have a family left if I don't stop and try and sort my debts out 🙁
Thank you for listening x
Hi Sambo08
Welcome to the forum and well done on recognising the problem with your gambling and for seeking advice. You will find a lot of support here and a community of people who understand your struggle with gambling please keep reading and posting on the forum.
Your gambling has escalated and you are in debt and you feel as if gambling has taken over your life. As well as self-exclusion you could look into installing blocking software onto your computer which will block your access to online gambling sites. Some of our forum users have described additional ways they try to limit their freedom to gamble online, by arranging their finances in ways that slow down how quickly they can access their money, or limiting their ability to spend money online. You might read forum posts here where members talk about changing their bank account to remove the facility to spend online, instead using a basic cash card that allows you to withdraw cash on the high street.
I would also encourage you to call our helpline and talk things through with a GamCare adviser on 0808 8020 133 or on our netline. The advisers can provide emotional support and helpful information as well as facilitate a referral to free one to one counselling appointments if you’d like to access that service.
Best wishes
Rachel.
Hi, I have just joined this forum... Yours is one of the first posts I have read and your story is a clone of my own. It is (in somewhat a backwards way) reassuring to know that I am not the only person who responds to gambling in this way. Thank you for sharing - I will do the same. I wish you the very best of luck in recovering and know that these impulses you get when you squander 1000's of winnings are not unique to you. I hope we can all help each other 🙂
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
