Hi everyone! My name is Daniel and I just discovered this site, is good to see people talking about the gambling addiction. In my eyes the majority of people don't know at all how dangerous an addiction like this can be! This is because the gambling industry generates so much money at the moment and that's why there is not a really aggressive campaign against gambling yet! With this being said now I will tell you a bit about my life story and my gambling addiction! Tomorrow I will be 27, for most of the people this sounds like a happy day but were I stand right now is close to giving up, no more power or resources to fight my addiction! So let's go back in time when I was just about 11-12 years old and my mom cought me spending my pocket money at the local kids arcades/gambling shop, we can say that's nothing special because all kids will play and arcade game or something similar at some point. But from that point my life was just a fight with my gambling demons. As a teenager I started to bet all my money on football and play occasionally all kind of other games, machines, roulette. I was just about 16-17 and even if my family provided me more then enough money, there was never enough! It was not long and I was a member of a gang getting involved in all kind of dangerous situations risking my life and my freedom! When I was about 18 I was known by the police, feared by most of people in the town for being a violent and kind of crazy guy! I use to make crazy amounts of money in ways which I will probably regret for the rest of my life... A kid making hundreds of pounds but loosing then all at gambling ,it didn't matter if one day I had 1000£ because next day I will have no money. When I was about 18 years old I decided to leave my country and go abroad try to find my way in life first stop was England but Italy, Norway, France, Ireland were a few other places where I will live for short or long periods of time! My family supported me all along and I will say that I own them thousands of pounds money which I either have been borrowed by them or offered or I just stolen them! Between 18 years old to 24 years I just lived my life like every day can be the last one, today I will sleep at a 5 star hotel in London and tomorrow I will sleep on the street without a penny in my pocket! I meet lots of people most of them helping me trying to be my friends but it just ended up in owning them money and loosing possible valuable friends, I had lots of relationships serious or not serious sooner or later my gambling addiction will kick on and destroy everything, many times I felt like I was just using people in my desire to get money and gamble! All this aspects are just making me depressed now because that's not the real me and I always felt bad for things which I did but just couldn't control myself! My gambling addictions bought me in front of a judge and after in prison for the first time when I was about 20, half an year in prison in Norway, I thought when I will be released I will be a changed man but this didn't happened because I just went back to my old habits! I was always under pressure the only time when I felt free and happy was when I was gambling, didn't matter if is a casino or online or a betting shop for me any for of gambling from football, horses, casinos,online will be what I wanted and what will make me to feel good! I was in bigger debts day after day and when I was 23 I ended up again in prison in a different country this time for a longer period of time! This was heart breaking, everyday was a nightmare, regrets and depression. When I got released when thing was sure I will never go back to prison, that's what I said to myself! b**t desire for gambling was still there still pushing me to do whatever just to make money, about 3 years ago I was really close to going back to prison and at that moment I realised that I can not stop gambling but I must stop any activity which is against the law because another sentence to prison is likely to be a long one and will probably end my life completely! So god helped me and I have 3 years since I am an honest person working hard 16 hours a day, making really good amounts if money but instead of paying debts and starting to save I just keep loosing more then I earn and my debts builded up to amounts of money which I can not afford to pay now! I am at that point were I lost probably about 200k so far and I just can not stop gambling! Tomorrow I will be 27 a day which should be happy but to be honest I have no reasons to be happy but just worries and reasons to cry! I don't want to make you people feel sorry for me because that's what I chossed to do with my life and there is still hope deep deep in my heart that one day I will leave this gambling behind me and live the kind if life which I always dreamed for! I want just to make my story known and show that gambling is one if the most dangerous addictions ever!!! P. S. I said to myself that from tomorrow I will stop gambling and I will try my best to do that. ( I only said that another million times before) ....
Yes heard similar stories many times before
What matters is are you willing to commit to your recovery this time? Not just while the times are good but the tough times?
Are you willing to get counselling and other help like GA?
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