Hi @kevthekev40. How are you doing? Hoping a bit better
@Charlieboy - People who don’t understand or who are ignorant to addiction are going to judge in ways that are upsetting. If everyone was built equally the same then we would be acting & behaving the same, this just isn’t the case. We’re all wired differently BUT everyone has some sort of addictiveness in there own make up.
You’ve made a decision that you want to change & want to be free of gambling... How amazing is that on its own!!! This is something that you should be proud of & rightly so! I think the road to recovery/sobriety being gambling free is to work on yourself & do this for you... You’ve already started this journey & now you take it a small step at a time & you’re doing that too!
I don’t know what the input from the family person was but they must care & love for you because if they didn’t they would more than likely just let things be & day nothing at all... It may be a case that they don’t understand fully what your going through & they are thinking they’re doing right in what they’re saying?
Maybe invite them to join this site as there is a forum for “friends & family”..?
What ever they have said it has effected & upset you so I’m sorry for that BUT it’s not triggered you to go to gambling so be proud of your own resilience in that!
You've noticed & recognised that you’ve gone 5 days now without gambling! HIGH BLOODY FIVE to that..! And you’ve also acknowledge that it’s been years since you could have done that too... You’re ok the right path now, being aware of how well you’re doing with you’re sobriety is a good thing & it may benefit you to map out 1,2,3....10 years & so on a timeline of milestones to give you more focus & direction. It may not work for everyone but to me I find it helps.
With the adverts... I know exactly what you’re saying & I think I ranted on my diary about this at some point. This is another great thing you’ve noticed to be fair! Before hand you’d probably seen it as a reminder to go again & that it pulls you in to gamble, but now you’ve spotted WOW how many adverts for gambling?!... You’ll see it now for what it is... ”It’s a dirty little secret right out in plain site”... All the little messages that come at the end like you’ve said “Stop when the fun stops” “Gamble responsibly”... Do me a favour, it’s there equivalent of a monopoly get out of jail free card - It means nothing & carries no value...
Do this for you as you’re doing right now & keep on with talking & posting. And soon your resilience will make you stronger & others will see that too... It’s a life choice you’ve made to stop & one that will test you but you’re not alone!
Im always available to talk.
Speak again soon.
Hi@sillyboy1981. Ty so v much for your post and what you have said makes massive sense. The person who had a go is one of those my**** don't stink type people however I asked her read up about gambling addiction and later on I had a conciliatory text saying that she was glad I was getting help. So I'm going to leave it there she can't make me feel more guilty than I already do. One of my problems is being wracked with pain a lot due to fibromyalgia gambling has been my go to when the pain is bad and I'm guessing that the chemicals released in our brains when we gamble have been helping me with the pain. You know where I'm heading now I've had to ask for stronger painkillers and guess what they are ADDICTIVE !! I'm scared of I take them I'll swap one addiction for another. Hobsons choice !! Now lockdown is easing I can go out for more walks and increasing exercise apparently will help over time. But know this these last 5 days although difficult away from gambling have proved to me the evilness of it all. When you win you don't win as it comes at a massive price for your mental and physical health I'm going to take that realisation forward to help me and use every single thing available to me that helps. Joining this site was a great move and everyone's posts help even the negative ones as it's a stark reminder what going back does. Th for your help its invaluable to me .
Hi @Charlieboy
It’s good that you’re finding help from others posts & being part of the community on this site.
How has your week been? Have you had any blockers or triggers that you’ve been faced with?
Looking at what you’ve said about winning... The person placing the bet NEVER wins no matter the outcome. The only thing you’ll win at is by walking away & putting that time & money into yourself & your loved ones, that’s when the prize is endless & priceless.
It is going to be hard & there’s going to be temptations... The way in which the world has changed lately is a temptation, the opening of the restrictions is going to be a temptation, the stress of lockdown is a temptations... These are never going to to go away & is why it’s so important that you’re doing this for you & that you want this as a life choice... Your loved ones & family you’re doing this for too but you are at the centre of your feelings & emotions... You’ll find out more about yourself going through this & find your inner courage & strength & it will blow you away!
Stay safe & stay strong... Hope you’re ok?
Speak again soon
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