Relapsed

Hi Amt722

I am sorry to hear of your recent relapse. Every time I read a post of a relapse it makes me realize just how powerful this addiction is and whether you give up for a month, year or 10 years we are all just one bet away from a relapse.

Obviously self-exclusion and blocking software is a good deterrent however if you are anything like me then that would not be the only thing to stop you. If you can give your bank card to someone you trust and only carry small amounts of money with you then this is a sure way to keep things under control as no money no bet.

On an emotional level think of reasons why you made the choice to gamble after a long period of abstinence. This will help you to identify your triggers and maybe seek other ways of coping.

Do not beat yourself up over this relapse but learn from it remember how awful you are feeling today the next time you are tempted.

Take care,

Amanda

Amt, amanda has given you good advice. I've not gambled now since September but I lapsed a lot before then. You have to ask what changed this weekend, anxiety about money ?( was big trigger for me), boredom, feeling down. The lapse can help you understand more and be more resilient. You might need help with that understanding therefore gamcare is a good starting point. All the best mate. See it as a way to progress, don't chase and try to learn from it.

Hi Thailand and Amanda,

Thank you for your messages, relapse is due to frustration of lack of funds and in my messed up mind thought that having a go on the slots again would be a quick fix. Been there tried that knew the outcome! Did'nt stop me though. I have been on and off gambling for 5-6 years now. All the relapses due to finiancial reasons. (quick fix) I know the reality of it, worse off now than when i stopped in January again. I do take positives though. The time away has meant I've not blown thousands of pounds, prior to January I was losing a substantial amount weekly that I could'nt afford getting myself in debt big time. I run my own company and was using funds that did'nt personally belong to me!. I have paid off several debts since January but got frustrated with how long its taking this weekend and lack of funds at mo. Got blocking software on my laptop but have recently got my desktop working again so used that to get online and reactivated my account. That was easy all they done was ask if i was now comfortable with my gambling after I contacted them in January to block my account. I will be closing the account and forgetting about this recent loss. In theory!!!

Thought of starting a new thread with same title but no point. Since June after abstaining for nearly 5 months (it can be done) i have been back in the saddle so to speak of constantly taking funds from my business and using them to gamble, i have cleared the business account and taken a payday loan this evening and lost it, i have maxed out the joint account to the overdraft limit i have with my wife. All within 3-4 days, been on a massive binge chasing losses.

I know i should'nt be stealing from my business, i feel as though the person who is gambling is an alter ego, its not the normal me, when i'm consumed during a slots session there is no rational thinking, only the constant chase of losses and depositing until no more funds available.

I have not slept for 4 nights, i feel physically sick all the time constantly stressing about the financial mess I put myself, family and business in.

Had enough this evening, so i have decided to post on here again, in January some very kind people were good enough to offer some support and it really did help and assist me with abstaining for the 5 months.

Sorry to hear you've slipped back into the gambling cycle mate. The losses need to be written off rather than chased! Every day it will get easier to lay off it. Good luck!

Hi I have stopped gambling for 11 days maybe because had no money to gamble that's why I lasted this long been gambling over 30 years has become an illness

Been having a think, after 10 days of abstinence I'm becoming very impatient. Thoughts are rife with how to recover the losses incurred that I have four months to repay into my business to balance the books.

I find being patient and waiting for the funds to accumulate very frustrating. Impatience seems to be my biggest hurdle in overcoming the compulsion.

Does anyone else suffer from impatience like me, constantly looking for a quick financial solution through gambling that in turn results in a life of debt and dispair!

Hi Amt722

I face the same issue. The patience bit I find really hard. No wonder I am again on my 2nd today again. If I can manage to get through those crunch moments when there is an intense urge I realize that things are so much better by staying away. I have experienced this before. The key is not having access to the funds and breaking that time-place-money triangle to deal with the impatience. I relapsed because I managed to find a way out. I am closing that door. Learning each time from every failure and putting necessary blocks on place. It is a fight that I am determined to win. Letting go is the toughest part but once I see off the crunch moments of frustration, impatience, anger, etc by reminding myself the aftermath of gambling and experiencing the sweet feeling of not gambling, I know that I am heading in the right direction.

Hi amt722, i sometimes read the posts on here and recognised your username, i wrote to you last time you posted a while ago. I'm pleased that you posted something and decided not to run away and hide the issue and try deal with it on your own. Do you know the funny thing is i'm having a costly month, my dental bill, new sofa, meals out, money put aside to savings, it's all made me skint this month and guess how i want to nick a few hundred quid even though i've got a stack of cash in savings because i don't gamble? yeah, i want to gamble right now, how messed up is that? so you're not alone. Get Gamblock, it will save you thousands pal believe me. It's ok to get online and gamble, but it's not ok if you're a compulsive gambler because it's never enough. If you won a thousand quid would you bank it? yeah right, it all goes plus more, maybe not today but tomorrow and the day after. They want you to go back and gamble, they know you're hurting, they're waiting for you to get hold of some more ammo (cash). Accept the defeat and move on, victory will take time, be patient, don't gamble and watch your fortune mount up, it won't all be in cash, it will be time and life for living. You once said "Hi, I am a 40 year old married to a wonderful, supportive wife with two amazing daughter's, (2 & 6 yrs old)", they need you, we need you, you need yourself. Let's do this......one day at a time.