Hi all I have posted somewhere on this forum lol but god knows where. Anyways a gambler for nearly 40 years on and off. But this time im ready to give up, not only for myself but my partner of 10 years whom when I met helped me turn my life around financially etc. Fortunate for me I didnt hide a track very well he found it I came clean and here I am today. Ive completly gave him all my finances shut all my banks down and will live on a atm card only with a allowance each week. I cannot trust or be trusted for now with the ability to go mad, im so happy now things are being sorted and thank dan for giving me this chance to keep our wonderful relationship going xx. Everyday this week I have walked right past a gambling den of myn saw the faces of the other gamblers outside and felt nothing or tempted to go back progress is comming on I think. Ive tryed to get in touch with apas but no joy yet? Does it normally take time? Im more possitive this time around as now friends and family know which they didnt before, I dont believe you can do this on your own without some support especially with our minds and those evil voices that tell you .. your ok u can stop tommorow after that big win which never comes. Dan asked me yesterday about the most id ever won. In one go £660 which probably cost me 40 grand from start to now, the start being when I was 7.
Anyways anyone out there can do this but willpower alone wont support and willpower combined is I believe the best drug to use for this horrible life changing disease we call compulsive gambling
Good luck everyone xx
Hey red...I've posted on 40 years
X
Ty loxxie I think ive found it lol
Xx
Hi, well just a quick update I'm still doing really well, no temptation Wat so ever to gamble, but am waiting and am ready with a hot poker!!! Unfortunately my partner has had some other issues to deal with as well as myn and has now broke down with all the stress, he was not to bad when I came in from work but I locked myself out of Internet banking and couldn't reset it, but managed to get on the app and after sorting all my finances out with him and not having access to my accounts it's some how £255 over bloody drawn unfortunately that amongst other things has broke him. I don't know now how to help him 🙁 red x
It's a process Red, not just for the gambler but also the partner and in truth it's the latter who suffers most.
So my humble answer to your question in ' how can you help him ' is Nothing! But concentrating in helping your self and building up the days will filter down to your partner and eventually rebuild the trust.
Despite wishing it was but ' Rome wasn't built in a day '
Ty volcano for your reply.. I'm happy to say things got sorted over the weekend and he's feeling a lot better now he's in full control over my finances including my wages into his bank account, which makes me feel a whole lot better. I'm now on day 15 and have £2 saved wohooo lol I still have had no urges even with all the stress but good news is I'm seeing a a.P.a.s counciler next Tuesday and hopefully my partner will ring and make appointment for himself. It's funny how you can go years and years relatively stress free then boooommmm loads of it comes at once to test you and my god are we being tested ... Hope you are all in bit better places today than yesterday red xxx. P.s is there a site for gamcare withdrawals lol it broke over weekend
Day 19 for me not had any urges to gamble at all thankfully just thoughts on what a waste of money over the years I've lost and what could of been done.. Partner is on the mend now but will take many many years for him to trust me with my own finances that's ok I am better of with a allowance each week 🙂 week 2 of my allowance so saving what I would of spent and putting it back in to what I've drained out my bank.. I've read many threads and posts on here and it looks to me the one thing we all have in common is boredom and a mental incapacity of knowing when to quit? But the other thing most of us have in common is we all know we need support outside this forum. It's hard to describe how happier I feel now that I have no more secrets and lies are long gone I finally see what I got is worth a lot more than my desires to loose my hard earned money xxxxx
Morning all day 21 I've now got 3 shiney £1 coins in my pot 😉 no urges to gamble still despite all the stress of recent, but thoughts are there but I'm battling them with my own mental blocks.. I watched a documentary this morning on gambling add and they call it a disease our Brian reacts differently when we win to we loose, it's like trying to beat a never ending money taking machine, it rang true with me because I've won loads of jp and was defiantly not jumping for joy, food for thought. P.s I Carnt remember but someone put in a thread about 2 gambling films they watched on YouTube 1 was the horses and the other fruit machines any ideas what they called??? I need something to do today and they would be perfect Ty red xxx
Hello Red, No, it wasn't me who put any films up. I believe Deano has put some good one's up in the past and also know if you trawl the ' overcoming section ' you'll also possibly find some.
Its good to see you wracking them days up and learning.
The best i can do is leave you with this -
Lol Ty for that volcano. I still Carnt find them films but have come across a few documentary etc.... I visited a councilor yesterday a oldish guy who introduced himself and said he was a pyciatrist ooooo I thought how wounderfull that this free service is providing a profetional person to deal with lost souls so Ty a.P.a.s for this service may it last along time. Anyway long story short, we spoke for a hour I told him my issues cried a little and he said what I've done so far is a fantastic step into recovering but there's more to do, come back next week 🙂 I know I can do this 22 days now I have to do this, I need to do this, I want to do this,... And hopefully over time I will gain a little bit of trust back from my partner who is supporting me still , even though we having difficult times I hope he believes in me xx hopefully he will be seeing a councilor aswell and make the dark a little lighter for him I hope, even though he's skeptible ... Anyways anyone know of any films regarding gambling let me know or documentaries stay gf forum users this site is a massive help xxxx red
One small step for Red and one giant leap for kicking this gambling malarkey into touch....
I will also 2nd the councillor, you have indeed made superb strides these past 22 days with your re(dis)covery.
Way to go you
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