Abstain and maintain.Stepping forward never back.

Wow Duncan

Your planned celebration is so much more rewarding. You and your family deserve that special occaision- you've put so much effort into changing the past year and helping to support others with their changes!

Take care

Irene

x

thanks duncs.,,just want this bit over with now...xxx

Morning Sir,

Honestly counting down the days with you. I have said it so many times but you are a massive inspiration on this site. If there was a list written of all the ways we can help ourselves to stay bet free you would tick them all off.

You lead the way with the positive posts and the huge change in your day to day life all because to coin your own phrase just for today No Bet!!

Thank You again,

Flagg

Morning diary.

So 8 days till that concrete sets and i Will continue to build.

Following on from the great post i read on the honourable SA's thread.

Today i have thought a great deal about self gratification.

At it i used to tell myself my gambling actions were done for the gains of those folk around me. Poppycock!! I gambled to feed my addiction nothing else, my gambling was to suit nothing other than that.

Today my addiction told me that things are different,it tried this morning to tempt me back, for what?? For my own self gratification. Me i told it/myself f**k you i lost and I'm done losing. No more,today just for today i Will stay in the winners enclosure.

I find gratification in all i do i go gung ho at everything, today I'm off work the weather is grim, but i was the only one over the fields with my dogs, ran them ragged they must have run 5 miles chasing balls,each other and the magpies !!! We have come home to bath the mud off us, breakfasts all round and now there sleeping exhausted but they look so content, satisfied full of gratification.

At work i cook every dish with the addition of something extra, my hope the customers expectancy beaten. They leave gratified, me i get a huge dose of it.

When i do every day tasks i do them to the best i can

why?? I am full of gratification.

Gambling meant i gave my all to an addiction that gave nowt in return. Ok there were temporary wins, the next bets stake raised, all to one end. Result Duncs lost.

Through abstinence i won, i win each day.

The folk around me are gratified, the bumps in the road exist, money at times needs budgeting,budgeting not blowing.

I live aware it would be possible to derail my life by listening to my addiction.its there it i know always Will be, like all addicts in recovery i am one step from destruction.

But today my resolve is strong, i do hold that stick my addiction beat me up with and through it i feel gratified.

Ironically the feelings i sort through gambling.

Something today i know is simply not on offer through going at it.

Today i feel like a winner the thing abstinence offers us all.

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Hi there

just one more to add to the list of things you can be gratified by is the inspiration you are to the oldies and the newcomers like me on this site. Your first contact made me feel safe to be open and honest.

On a lighter note , it's snowing outside - really fancy a hot, warming curry.

Enjoy your day off.

xxx

Morning Duncs,

Today and for nearly a year you have been a winner every day, You have fought this head on, with such a positive approach, never ever stepping back into the gambling darkness.

You, your life, your family and even your 2 dogs are filled with love, life, happiness and hope for the future and you my friend deserve nothing less.

I am so excited for your 1 year milestone, and I am so proud to have shared some of it with you, I

Will you be going to G.A for your Pin ?

Take care

Blondie

DMac,

Thanyou for your kind words on my diary, which was much appreciated. Clearly, I have endured a difficult few days last week but I am as determined as ever to continue on the path I set out on just under a year ago. I hope that I am not the type of person you described that has a major blow out once every year. I want to remain gamble free for the rest of my days. No exception.

I look forward to congratulating you on a year free of gambling in the not-to-distant future.

Tomso.

Hey Duncs..

Like you said you may be one step from destructin but choosing to step away from the detanator in the opposite direction is what you have done and will do .....always forward.

thank you for your post Duncs

also stepping and breathing now xx

Evening diary.

Woke this morning feeling like something was a miss.

We are having our bathroom re fitted this week and the fella was due at eight, so i planned a day off around this.

He turned up at 11and went to lunch at 1 for an hour.

And then wrapped up at 4. Still i won't judge until i see the finished job and it is price work. I did use my time to walk the dogs, catch up on the news and rest up a bit.

Tomorrow i leave Sarah and Joe to deal with the workman and off to work. I have the anxious feeling whenever things don't run to schedule. But do feel comfortable enough to not let it fester or cloud my mood.

The bathroom will be good that i know, we will have a proper shower for the first time. Which will be a godsend. I also got to marinade some chicken for round 5 of my curry trials. 7 days till the gamble free year, today my blocks and resolve served me well.

I accept the things i cannot change.

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Evening diary.

Woke up feeling like i had a fight with a truck and lost.so let my boss and spent the day in bed,dozing on and off if i feel like this in the morning i will call the docs.

Still my dogs enjoyed themselves all curled up.

The bathroom proceeds slowly lol.

6 days left on the countdown clock.

Duncs stepping forward never back

Hey Duncs,

Hope you're feeling a bit better. Apart from you feeling a bit rubbish you can give yourself a huge pat on the back for doing amazingly.

Thank you for continued support on my diary and I'll be counting down these next six days and gunning for you. You are a wonderful inspiration on this site to many.

Hope the curry trials are coming along and that you're prepping your crew for that sit down affair you spoke about. I think you can almost taste it right ?

Keep doing what you're doing.

Bilko

hey duncs;;

nuggle up with the wuffs and keep warm..its gonna snow..lol

hope you feel better soon...cant have the gc forum succumbing to colds anf flu...x

i shall have to administer some cyberherbal medicine to you .take care and still counting the days...cant wait to reaad sarahs post ..( no pressure sarah..lol0

r and d xx

Hey Duncan

Hope the curry trials are going well. Getting ever closer to that year mark now. I cannot wait to chalk up a year. Your diary is such a source of inspiration in my quest to lead a normal life free of gambling and all the stresses and misery it brings. I'm in a good place at the moment. Wish I had a lot more money in the bank but hopefully with time I can change that. The road is long but not so fraught with obstacles these days.

Thanks for your comment with regards to my Everest trek. Very kind words. Meant a lot and inspires me to see it through to the end. As I said on my thread I think it would be cool to stick a Gamcare flag in the ground and take a picture when I reach the base camp. I'm using it as a visual incentive. Got a lot of training ahead of me but I feel it will actually play a huge part in my recovery. Telling myself that I can do so much more with my life. We'll see how the next year goes. Must not gamble at all costs.

Thanks again. Have a great week.

G

hi duncs,

Hope your feeling better soon, I to am in sick bay today and think that truck visited me after it had rolled over you a few times lol.

Thanks for your post the other day and what a fantastic idea, My mum will now be giving me away in what ever form my wedding takes and she couldnt be happier. Im also going to have a table in the reception called "Gone but not forgotton" and have some pictures of the people who cant be pysically there on the day but who we will carry with us, also a picture of my dad on my bouquet so he will be walking with me either way.

The big count down continues and Im also looking forward to sarahs post again no pressure lol.

Take care, keep warm.

Blondie.... Aaaaatiisshoooooo !!

Morning diary.

5 days to go and through the year milestone. A time in which i have learnt more about myself than in any of the other 37 i had. I can face up to anything and with my head held high. I Will be collecting my one year pin from ga,something i won't be giving back. Through ga i learnt that my efforts would be hard earnt and the statistics stacked against me. That fact that one of the long serving members of my ga gave still ring through my ears. Only three out of every hundred that walk through my room make it to one year. Frightening stat that, how could we change that to get it higher?? A priceless question, i wish i had the answer.

The list of absent folk from my ga reads like the parallel of this forum. The folk that were here at the start, Smiler,js123,Keith iow,scampious,the steg,alexous520 and many more to count. I hope like many others they seek recovery elsewhere or someday return to continue there battle to find abstinence.

I Will be here to welcome them if they do.

Blondie great choice!!!

Feeling just as rough today, not like me to take to bed, but know it is the best place.i feel like all my energy got sucked out, just left some aching bones.

So i Will dose up on my gamcare and keep warm with my hot water dogs. Funny last night when my Sarah came up to bed they refused to move lol. I think she got a corner lol.

Still five days till she graces the forum with her presence.

As this journey has been as much a part of her life as it has mine.

For that each day i thank my lucky stars. My heartbeat,my soulmate and my best friend.

No bet today. No today i choose to be a winner.

Duncs stepping forward never back.