Day 1 , yesterday last day of gambling ! no more

hello everyone ! my name is michal , Im Polish , Im 34 . I gamble since Im 17 so this is time to say stop . This is not only about me , this is about all of us who have the same problem I do . Where to start ...... It would be too long story if I say everything what happened to me ever last 17 years so I will try to tell you guys about my biggest problems and how this all affect my live , familly , friends . Today is day 1 and Im quite surprised that I do not want to bet ! I have check couple of time livescores and games of today but did not bet . I have to say that for last few days or even weeks I was reading all this post here on the forum and I think It can help me to stay away from gambling . You do the same guys ! pls do , read your post and the others over and over again and think twice before u do something stupid again ! Every single story is very sad : my girl has left me , I have lost my son , I had to steal to gamble ........ what a live and what a experience ! Yesterday I have gambled another £250 , I have lost and promised to myself that this was the last time ! It is funny when we gamble £250 , £500 , £2000 and this is ok , but when you want to buy new clothes , pay bills or just give to your friend £50 as birthday gift then we behave like greedy f...s ! I always remember after loosing some money when my girl ask me : do you want to go out tonight , or maybe you can get yourself new pair of trousers I was always saying finding some excuses to not spend any money , but I would gamble again next day !! Please do not forget that this is a drug , a disease ! we cannot control it but we can fight it and we can win ! I have told my girl who I love so much about my problem , 2 times maybe 3 already . This time I cannot , it would break her heart and I have to do this by myself ! Im sick of lying to my family , my girl that I do not gamble when I do , yesterday was my last day , my last bet ! Even last night my girl asked me , when was a last time I bet ? I have lied and said that I did not gamble since last time I told her i was gambling (big lie) Can you imagine what do we have to do ? to lie to your family ! I feel disgusted with myself ! Spending hours on my mobile just to check another footbal game , then bet and wait or wach live and wait again for results , if I win or lose I place another bet and all day long the same story ! Even going to the gym , I love gym ! could not focus on my workout , constantly checking my mobile every 5 min and checking scores and bet again ! Everything was less important then my bets ! I did not want to spend time with my family , did not want to play with my nephew , he is only 6 ! did not want to give him any money , greedy uncle I am ! my sister probably thunks I am not normal ! Even my nephew , 6 yo ! says to me somethimes : please put your phone away Uncle Michael ! can you imagine ??? going to toilet , shop , gym , going out with friends .....on my mobile 24 / 7 ! im sick of this ! Like i said today i feel a little bit better and I will not gamble today , just another day , little by little..... the worst thing is that this is taking a big part of my live and I have to change it ! I want to spend more time with my family with my girl , I want to listen to them and be for them when they need me , and stop being greedy ! I have a great job , I am a club house manager (golf course) . For last months I did not do anything for company , did not promote the business .. nothing , thats is so wrong ! I was constantly on my mobile betting ! Today I did some work and Iam happy about this , I did orders etc.... so yeah , it is very sad but well it is done now and it is better to stop now . The only way to win against bookies is to not gamble ! 2 days ago I had a football game 11/1 friendly game . I did not bet , but underdog won ! so I would have made some money , but I just know that few hours later all would be gone and probably another £300 from my own pocket ! Day 1 ......... long way I know , but I have to be strong !!