First day of the rest of my life...

Hi Mrs Me,

You have come to the right place this time!

Problem gambling escalates. It is a progressive addiction.

You will need to give up gambling 100% to give yourself the very best chance.

There are many women on here who are doing our best to stay away from online slots. They lure us in with the free spins. They are designed by experts who know how our brains work. They are deliberately made to be addictive.

As soon as we took that first spin we were hooked.

Read the diaries and you will find lots of advice. Keep posting and you will build up lots of friends who know exactly how you are feeling.

Well done on making this big decision. You can do it.

Take care,

Suzy

Hi Suzy,

Thank you for replying to me, its good to know there will be plenty of people to talk to. I have just came on laptop and been tempted to look for somewhere to gamble but then made the decision to come on here instead, i could really see this site being a life line for me when i really need it. Beginning to feel positive again. I look forward to chatting to you more.

Hi Mrs Me

It's great that you took this step. It will help to bring back some normality into life rather than a racing head thinking about gambling all the time. I stopped for over a year but went back to it through complacency and stupidity I suppose. Tomorrow will be my first day without a bet this time around so we are starting at the same time.

All I know for sure is that I was happier and more relaxed when I wasn't chasing my losses and I can't wait to feel like that again.

Good luck, Myles

Hi Myles,

Thank you for writing to me. We can do this together, i plan to write on here every day and every time i get the urge, i have found this has helped tonight anyway. Tomorrow is a new day, you can draw a line under what has happened and try again. I am glad to see you were happier when you werent gambling and i look forward to feeling like this in time, and following your journey too. We can do this!

Good luck to you too, MM

Well.... I last gambled early yesterday morning which means today is only day 1 but I've made it 24 hours! Something I am extremely happy about, I got an urge about half an hour ago so I logged in here and read some diaries and the urge has faded for now. So here's to getting through today, day 1.

Good morning Mrs Me ,

I am sure you feel better after no gambling yesterday.

Take it one day at a time and they will soon build up.

Your brain is programmed to gamble daily so you need to look after yourself so well . You need to put your Recovery before your family right now. Don't get involved in family stuff. Save all your energy for fighting the urges. Eat well and be kind to yourself.

If you look on the left hand side you will see "Advice ".

Read the leaflet on "Women Gamble Too ".

Take care and keep posting on this diary .

Suzy

Thank you for pointing me there Suzy, I have read through and it's made me think also. I have 2 close family members who are compulsive gamblers, none of whom want to stop but I felt I couldn't say much as well I was just the same, but having seen one get in lots of trouble through gambling it has made me more determined as I know where this can all lead. I used to frown at them for wasting there money, but watching their wins come in, I thought I'd have a go at bingo and low and behold within spending my first 10 I'd won over 500 and of course that was it then it all started. I don't want my children to grow up seeing me gambling and them being tempted or thinking it's normal. In the early days I could withdraw when I won but more recently when I've won amounts over 200 I find myself trying my luck trying to win bigger and wasting it all on one particular slot sure the win was about to come in. I don't want to be consumed by this anymore. I feel very grateful I found this site yesterday and look forward to following everyone else's journeys, their strength encourages me, I can do this.

Thank you Suzy.

Hi Mrs Me,

How did you get through the day?

Not too bad I hope.

Take it hour by hour or minute by minute if it is really tough. Do something else to take your mind off it.

Slow but sure is the way to go.

So many start off all guns blazing but the novelty wears off quicker this way. Find new things to do during the hours you filled gambling. Even going off for a long walk to clear your head will help.

Put all the barriers in place and even if you have urges you will not be able to gamble.

Take care,

Suzy

Hi Suzy,

I've done it, day 1 complete. It wasn't too bad tbh I kept myself busy and every hour that went by I got a sense of accomplishment from staying away, I know it won't always be this way and there will be some trying times. But I'm willing to put all the focus and strength I have on this. I am determined this time. Usually I'd of wasted my weekends online but instead I've been out doing things, I really am so glad I found here. How have you found the day Suzy?

Hi MM

Well done on your first day betfree. It is an achievement when you consider how often we used to gamble. And when we weren't gambling we were planning our next bet. All we have now is the urges and they will weaken over time as we manage to control them. It never goes away - I am evidence of this!

Very pleased for you. Myles.

Hi Myles,

How was your day yesterday?

Here's to day 2. I feel pleased I can talk to people who relate, I was always to worried to tell anyone as I was scared they wouldn't understand so it's a relief to be able to open up. Hope you have a good day ahead. X

Hi MM

Solid days yesterday and today. Today has been much better as I try and plot my way back to an even keel. It will be a juggling act for me as I am studying currently so I can't get back as quickly as I would like. Pleased to say that I have finally accepted my losses and this was crucial for me when I gave up first time round. We all have the same problem which is lack of control. I am not able to moderate (not just gambling) and that is where my problem lies. I will never be able to manage it. Hopefully I can remember this next time I entertain the thought it will be different. I am 26 though so I still have time! There are lots of young members on this site which confirms for me that this is the great problem of our generation (more betting shops than customers for me - all financed by FOBTs in truth). With this in mind you can always speak to someone on this website who shares the affliction or me directly.

How did you get on today? Hopefully 2/2.

Myles x

Hi Myles,

Totally agree, I'm 25 and I've been doing it for years unfortunately, I too feel I have accepted the losses now, it's to looking forwards never back. I'm glad to see you have had solid days, are you at uni studying? I'm doing a course through work and it's helped to keep me busy the last few days were as previously I was leaving the work til last minute. First real try today , had an email from one of the company's I self excluded from saying there was a bonus in my account if I went back, that's been my biggest test so far, but I'm glad to say day 2 is done, gamble free. It feels good, I feel happier already somehow. We should be very proud of ourselves! X

Hi MM

That's great news. Yes an important two days for us. Also being able to resist the temptation created by the email was a sign of how far you can come in recovery even in a short space of time. They're awful to email someone who has self-excluded about bonuses. This week I received an email stating that my exclusion period had ended recently with an online betting company and encouraging me to return. I can understand why self-exclusion is not permanent but actively encouraging those members to return seems quite sinister.

But the fact is we didn't bet and we can not bet again tomorrow!

I am studying to become a teacher this year. Studied History at uni until 2009 and since then I have had full-time jobs (the first one being in a bookies which is where my problem really started). I have set some goals on my diary because I find that whilst I was betting I had absolutely no regard for anything (other than making money) and through recovery you can really start to go places - your course sounds perfect for this.

Bring on day 3.

Myles x