...

Hey Sesuo, I'm here too along with hundreds of other silent soldiers marching alongside you!

A lovely shout out to your big sis there 🙂

Bob & weave girl, bob & weave!

Keep going S very proud of you for fighting, and no more gambling since last post.

Keep determined strong and stay safe because you are sooo much worth it.

Sxxxxxxxxx

Hi Sandra, I've just read your back and forth conversation with Stephen and I'd just like to let you know you won't be alone in not posting to his diary (he made that decision for me)

I'm sure its water off a Ducks back and hope to see you bouncing back as normal to the forum...onwards and upwards....Ginger

Hi ginge and thanks girls

Sorry to hear the post in question has affected you also dear ginge, but we all make our own choices personally...i just pray the diarists picks up on how this addiction can make us feel sometimes. Acceptance is the key, first step in recovery.

dear diary,

No gambling over here, but also not much else to comment. Life goes on eh even if it feels like still picking the pieces, I'm looking ahead and not bk...will get that puzzle sorted eventually ☺

Stay safe all and keep fighting the good fight

Sandra x

Hi little friend,

Step by step and keep fighting the good fight.

Look after you and keep looking up for that sunrise, it is up there.

Sxxxxxxxxx

Hi S, thanks for your kind words 🙂

Diary,

Not really happy with this blocking software i have installed. Numerous times now it just dissapears and i feel exposed to my own poison. Like now, i could go through Internet Explorer (which i am on now) and sign up for some sites. It's a little dissapointing, to get quite recognised block which doesn't do the job properly.
Another point would like to make about the abstinence. We all do it for ourselves, nobody pushes us to place a bet...it is battle with ourselves, our emotions and even if gambling establishments could be a bit more regulated with more signs about the danger of getting addicted...ultimately it all falls down to us to realise if we addicted or not...
And some more ramble today. GA...ok, this site is getting to the stage of sounding like its the only way to beat this addiction if I'm honest... and not by our individual choice... i must add. Yes, it does work for some people and i would lay my head for every single one of us to heal that way. Reality is, we do what works for us, and hammering the same words over and over again is not helping. This is just my own opinion...and no, i haven't been in GA room before (before our soldier in shiny armour jumps in to object that i didn't try everything). GA is not for everyone - full stop. I've been in other organisation following 12 steps and yes, there is something amazing about those people and the structure all together. It does work.
I don't say i will never try GA, but in my opinion we get through stages in recovery and finding our own path ahead. Once again - it's within us. We are the ones to do the dirty deed and we are the ones to put things right again. In any way what works for us and we all got it in us, just have to find the way of unlocking the mechanism to let that motor rumble to life again and let it work wonders. It does need maintenance now and again and not a smooth ride, but there so many alternatives of making recovery work.

Ramble over!
Stay safe all, at peace and choose the way what works for you individually. Many of choices to make recovery a success.

Sandra x

Hey you,

Can you contact the provider of that software & see if it is installed properly? As you say, you expect better from the branded ones! As you quite rightly point out, we are masters of our own recovery & even if the blocks do make it a little easier to stay strong, you can do this!

Keep trying those puzzle pieces until they slide in together...No forcing them into spaces they don't belong! (I have no idea why I wrote that but I'm sure you get what I mean)!

You are doing great, keep bobbing & weaving towards the sunrise girlie, it's just there on the horizon!

Keep taking your own advice - ODAAT

Hi Sandra
keep fighting girl, am on nights this weekend so guess I will not be seeing you.
Please be kind to yourself
Cheryl xxx

Awwweeeeee...i missed ya on those breaks Cheryl, won't b long and i will re join you ☺ patience...lol
ODAAT, i just want my bloody money bk if that block doesn't work!..besides i owe ya that 200 quid (me never forgets lol) so every penny will help 😉

Diary,

Taking my own advice - No gambling today! Mr G can go bk to hell where he came from...all i can say :
RRRROOOOAAAAARRRRRRR!!!!!!!

have a good day all and it only can be good if we keep our sanity for ourselves 🙂 HD!

S x

Great post last night Sandra..that was no rant, that was 'bespokeism' in all it's glory, it's all the rage ya know...if you need help with Juuuunes puzzle let me know coz I'm good at em..i did one the other day only took me 2 hours and it said 3 years and over on the box....keep rattling those cages Girl...onwards and upwards...Ginger.

Labas Sesuo, thank-you for dropping by...So very glad you're figuring that puzzle out 🙂 Progress not perfection remember!

I love the roaring my little tiger - Raaarrr right back @ Ya 🙂

Hi Sandra
Will have a liquid stash for some time the amount we have left in the house.
Welcome anytime, keep fighting those demons a day at a time.
Walking alongside you
Cheryl xxx

Thanx both dear soldiers 😉

Diary,

Well, what can i say...it sure turned out nice today 😀 last minute 'plan hooligan' which are the best i must add lol, took me to other town this morning...to do some ice skating (why not to swap sun for the ice?...gotta some times lol). It was great and had a chance to show my moves! Towards the end i brought my skills out (not by the choice...ice needed cleaning ☺) but all ended steady and on two legs...ok ok...with the hand touching the ice.. 🙂

Has been a good day, one of those where i rarely have recently:....no thoughts of mr G..no stress and no worrying of what tomorrow brings...sort of new for me, peace and ability to be myself...square peg but accepted by nation.
Even anxiety gone outta window which is my main issue on this earth.

So yep...another soldier i have met and am so thankful for all the laughs and smiles.
Another brick has been laid in my journey and boost of confidence to make changes in my life.
Progress not perfection, we keep moving on and looking ahead.

Thanks my friend for your time and the reminder of how important recovery is in our lives.

Stay safe all, keep fighting the good fight.

Anything is possible 🙂

S x

🙂 HD - It sure turned out nice again!

Lovely post S,

Keep building those bricks one by one and looking towards, and keep progressing.

Life can be very sweet as long as we make the right choices for ourselves.

Here's to today turning out nice again HD indeed.

Sxxxxxxx