HARMONY !

hi shiny

No gamblings the new gambling

Hey shiny,

thought about you today just wanted to share that with you.

Hope your still concentrating on you and all is well, I know that your also putting in 100% to finding that outfit for the red carpet event.

Take care

Blondie xxxxxxx

Yo,

Yep I am fine thank you .

I found a bit like Tomso that I was getting really frustrated about my moving addictions .

Although not gambling , I had started to drink unhealthy again , the level of my smoking had almost doubled and the washing machine brain was stuck on fast spin .

I like Dunc have been working with Mr B ( a very fine fellow I must say ) to take my recovery to the next level . A bit like having a sponsor .

This is working for me , in fact my best mate told me that I was the happiest she had ever seen me the other day .

Maybe I will spend the rest of my life bouncing between addictions , although I really do not relish the thought . I have a need to try to discover if there is a way to find some peace with it all . Or as I have said before find a way to live in harmony with my addictive compulsive personality .

I think I have learnt in recent months that the middle is the place to be , and see so many believing the same thing . And had found a degree of peace in that , but I believe rightly or wrongly that I need to constantly strive to move forward , searching for answers that may or may not be there . I know that it was something that my good friend Smiler was always in search of . And wonder sometimes if he still is .

So at the moment I am still focusing on me , which is quite unnatural for me . All my life I have me and my needs at the bottom of a long list of people . Believing that by putting others first , I would increase my own self worth . Something that we loose along with our money .But learning now that it does not work that way . As compusive gamblers in trying to make amends to all insundary , we can loose ourselves and in doing so forget that we have needs and wants . Till we become almost inconsequential .

So my quest I suppose is to try to turn that on its head . Maybe this will then I will not resort to one of my addictions to seek comfort .

Who knows ........ But I will keep you posted .

And if by some miracle I find the holy grail that is the answer so many of us are searching for , I promise to pass it on .

Stay well everyone , but more importantly never forget no matter what you have done , you matter just as much as the next person.

Be kind to you , you deserve it!

Shiny xxxxxxxxxx

hey Shiny

good to see you back on page one...

I understand what you mean about the difficulty of putting your self first and it feeling odd..addictions aside....personally I think being female of a certain generation as we are also doesnt help matters but thats a whole other conversation.

Also wanted to add that I think cultural programming is part of the cycle especially with women and the expression of the emotion anger where much guilt is carried and repressed.

All I know is that if i had been encouraged to be a more selfish person when I was younger I would not have ended up codependant because i would have been able to give from a full pot with boundaries and been more real help to people and not an empty one to the point of exhaustion and total resentment..

I hope you and Mr B and Mr M working well and wish you all the best in the new chapter of your recovery...

Am also on the same but different path and likewise will always be a perpetual student of life...lol

R and D xx

Hi Ya Shiny,

"the happiest you have ever been" Now, that's a beautiful thing to hear/read. Keep moving forward Shiny lady. Take your rightful space in the sky. You are a true star!! And, out of the millions up there I will always be able to recognize YOU! Inconseqencial -- never -- always my friend -- yes. -joanxxxx

Good Evening,

I read your last post with great interest. I will never live in harmony with my compulsive addictions. I am out to defeat them everyday. I suppose I have put them in a list of priority and gambling remains firmly at the top of that list simply because that compulsion doesn't only threaten my happiness but that of the ones I love most. Secondly, and rather in a vain sense, this week I am tackling my over-eating. I have eaten like an Olympic athlete this week (obsessed by goodness). Third of all, I have smoked like a chimney today in preparation for yet another attempt at quiting tomorrow. I never smoke more than ten a day but today that figure may well be doubled. In true bizarre fashion I usually have my first cig after 5.30pm each day but not today. Today I have went at it hammer and tong. Every stop smoking website will say if you don't need one within an hour of getting out of bed you aint that addicted. I am great at proving this opinion to be false. Tomorrow, I am working away and will be away for two days. No better time for success. My wife won't have to witness my terrible agitation. Tonight, I am positive about my chances of success not just in tackling one addiction but about conquering them all.

As DMac says we must never stop stopping. Take care of you.

Tomso.

Hey Shiny

Thanks for popping in....

You're off chocolate !!....I'm off shopping.!! lol

Its gonna be a lean one this year which is no bad thing..trimmiing off excess and just getting excited about the simple stuff.

hugs

R and D xx

o*g iv'e just realised who you are haha came to write a post back and seen you've changed your name 😮

thank you for the post on my diary,means a lot

i remember we had a lot in common when i was last here,

i really hope you are will and will speak soon

Hollie xxxxxxx

Yo,

Fancied having a gamcare binge , so I did !

Spent most of the day in London today , dad had his appointment with St Dunstans , they will now decided if his blind enough to be signed up. Quite enlightening really spending 4 hrs with the blind derby and jones group. When they talk about their time in the war , and what they went through sort of puts your life in a better perspective. One of these guys was 91 , and running marathons with partial sight upto 10 years ago

So we should hear tomorrow , I hope it's a yes . Cause although he can see , it is only in one eye and then down to about 10% . I would like him to be able to go to the social activities , he really enjoyed talking about his time in the army this afternoon. And is so terribly isolated at home .So fingers crossed

Me I am doing brilliantly , bought my outfit for the big 100 thingy which is in about 2 weeks .

Still concentrating on myself , but just felt a need to catch up of all my gamcare buds , just to let you know you are all still in my thoughts , even if I am not posting much at the moment .

Big hugs to you all ..

Shiny xxxxxx

Hi shiny

Thanks the post,

I was actually having a down day yesterday but like this rollercoaster ride of a journey,I am feeling fine today and that always make me smile when I see old regulars pop in and share they are going strong

Well done for that

And hope you get news you wanna hear

No gamblings the new gambling

Carl

Wit wooooooooooooooo !!

You go girlfriend lol looks like you didnt need your fairy GOK mother to help you find that catwalk outfit you did just fine.

Good decision re the DM's they are so Last week lol....

So happy to see you doing well and what a lovely story about your dad I do hope you get that big fat yes very soon.

The spin cycle has finised for today lol.. All is well.

Take care shiny pants and nearly shiny shoes lol.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Wassup Shiny!

I tell you now. I am hardcore to the bone. That image you have keep it there! LOLOLOL

You made me laugh so much on your post on my diary missus. You alway's do. Love ya for that.Thanks!

Glad your sweeping through this, and dont listen to Blondie, get those DM's! lol Hehe Blondie

Well, gotta chat some more, good to hear from you my awesomeness.

JP

Good Morning,

Always a real pleasure to hear from you my friend. Much of my smooth progress at the moment owes much to the advice and support I received in those early days. It has helped me so much and enabled me to remove many of the unnecessary stresses. I think we have enough stress in life without adding to it with gambling worries.

Anyway my point is you were right up on that list giving me a helping hand and I will be eternally grateful for that. To see you concentrating on yourself is music to my ears. I sincerely hope you get positive news for your dad sounds like he felt right at home yesterday :).

Right off to work if I do hit a traffic light that will be the reason.

Keep being kind to yourself,

Flagg

hey Shiny,,

Music to my ears when you say "just concentrating on myself"...absolutely brilliant.

Your oufit sounds great..but not sure about the DM's ..am sure blondie has some Jimmy Choos stashed away somewhere.

Yes...my retail therapy has slowed down to a stop but no bad thing as i could open a small branch of Lewis's ..lol

Take care and keep putting you first..feels weird but in no time it becomes lot easier...

im an expert at it now....lol

R and D xx

Good to hear you're doing well Shiny. Keep doing what you're doing, if it works it works, all good.

Take care

Steve