Hope

Mornig SA hope you enjoy a few cold ones and catching up with friends.

Glad to here you have the blocks in place.

Hope yopu have the hangover remedies in for the morning lol

take care

W xx

hello mate. . Think your spot on with the kids statement. . A totally intelligent answer. I never gave it a thought. . Your right though canny stop it from time to time. . thing that got me was the amount of pages it merited and with loads spelling mistakes at that.bloody kids .

Cheers for your thoughts everyone.

No gambling issues here. Had a bit too much to drink yesterday as pre-dicted but was home by midnight in the end so that was good. Approaching 14 km down the gym today in 1 hour 20 mins. No injury problems. Posh sauasages for dinner. Thanks for reading.. S.A

Hi SA,

hope your 'sports injury' is feeling better. Glad you managed to have a good knees up without the betting devil coming out.

Take care,

f x

Hi SA

You are putting some work in down the gym lately.I could do with working my beer off.Its strange m8 i cant find the time to go the gym ,but always find time to go the pub lol.Glad to see you are feeling strong again m8.All the best Jeff.

Hi Jeff... yes ive no idea how you find time to go to the pub but not the gym... one of the great mysteries of the universe me thinks lol

Anyway talking of the gym 14.96 km's today in 1 hour 25 minutes. I would have done 15 km but the time i'd put in ran out and the machine stopped. But hey am not gonna grumble about the machine not saying 15.00 lol It use to say that on the slot machines I gambled on before it went to 00.00 of course! My legs are fine specimins at the mo.. no pain, no nothing.. long may it last.

No gambling problems, the sun is shinning. I am smiling 🙂 Regards to all who read this... S.A

no gambling issues and sun shining. . Perfect conditions mate.. . . best wishes in your recovery we can do this 🙂

Hi S.A

Glad to see the recovery is still going well! 15km at the gym is well good, i've joined the gym for something to do instead of think about gambling. No where near 15km like but getting there.

Keep it up mate,

Jimmy

Woah! that is about 9 miles isnt it? you are army fit!

Well done you,

f x

Thanks guys and gals.

Am really getting back into my running again for sure but always atleast one rest day between each run and the stretching of course.. 11km yesterday in 1 hour 4 mins. No injury problems and perhaps more importantly no gambling problems.

Not much else to say really am in a fairly positive and settled place just at the moment. Regards to all who read this.. S.A

Another day passing gambling free. I did 16 km's (10 miles) in exactly 1 hour 30 minutes today. Its been many months since I did that sort of distance with that sort of speed. If only i could get rid of my wobbly belly then under 2 hours for the half-marathon is very much on the cards.

Am gonna try and lose some weight by not buying bread. I find its the late evening marmite/pate or cheese sandwiches that does the damage. If I havent got the bread in the cupboard I cant do the damage. Am gonna stock up with fruit and whole wheat cereals as snack/comfort food. Better to eat a box of healhy cereal than a whole loaf of bread with fatty spreads me thinks. Anyway so thats the plan.. lets see what happens.

Am in a good place today.. probably the after run "high".. yesterday was a bit of a struggle.. bored and restless but thankfully didn't go out drinking and feel much better for it. I find Saturdays quite difficult not so much because of all the sports gambling oppurtunities but becuase I just don't know what to do with myself. In contrast I really enjoy Sundays evening when nothing much planned.

Am not especially looking forward to work tomorrow. I already forsee conflicting demands being placed upon me.. it may all feel a bit stressy. But like i'd probably suggest to others, I will cross that bridge when i come to it. I will enjoy the rest of today. Time to cook something nice and filling for tea so myabe I don't have to eat that proverbial box of cereal later on. No gambling issues. Regards to all who read this.. S.A

Gee.. I just had a bad experince. A friend of mine said did I want to go to a dance class. I said yeah why not.. its something new.. step outside of my comfort zone.. something ive not tried before.

Anyway so we arrive at this big hall and its cirroc dancing and before I know am watching these cirroc dancers demonstrating moves up on the stage and then its the masses that practice them, first without music and then with music and with a succession of different partners.

What happened?.. well I went to pieces. Some of my partners started getting frustrated with me.. my total inability to *** even the basics was clear to see. My anxiety got so high that i didn't know what i was doing and i became unable to follow what was being demonstrated.

Of course in dancing the man takes the lead and all that. But i found myself just standing their feeling like a complete idiot, so I just walked out and went home.. self-confidence and self-esteem in the toilet.

Some things I feel confident at in this world.. dancing aint one of them. Deep down I know that I had I been able to overcome my inner anxieties I may have been ok.. but i wasn't. I wasnt able to laugh at my ineptitude and enjoy it any way. Is a shame but atleast I went.

This experince says alot about my deeper issues and my addiction. I always felt at ease when gambling on the slots. Just like i feel at ease writing on here. Its like relaxation. Its like where i can be myself and chill. I am an intelligent man but my self-esteem is low this evening..

Its a funny thing that with some things I am supremely confident and yet when i am being observed or have to perform to an audience i can go to pieces easilly. I havent had an anxiety experince like that for a long time though.

Anyway despite everything. No gambling urges. Another day passes gambling free.. S.A

Hi S.A,

I wouldn't worry about the whole dancing thing. I don't know one man that is good at dancing! I'd be the same but the difference is i wouldn't even try it so well done for giving it a go!

Glad to see everythings going well with the recovery and that all your concentration is with more beneficial things like the gym!

Keep it up mate,

Jimmy

yes, totally agree with you Jimmy. I gave it a go thats the main thing.

All is fine here. Emotionally stable. No gambling issues. Working recovery as best I can. Taking life a day at a time as always. Regards to all who read this.. S.A

Its so funny how we forget all the hundreds of other things we are good at, when in the throws of f*****g something up in front of an audience!

I was cringing along with you there SA. Keep getting out of your comfort zone though - you also get to find out that you love things, that you never knew you did 🙂

Glad your self esteem has risen once more!

take care,

f x