Type it out on here if you can Charl...but if not dont worry if your tired...just glad to know you are ok.
don't worry about answering posts...im sure most on here would just be glad to see the odd one liner on your own diary to let us know your ok...
its unconditional hun...
No pressure...
R and D xxx
As carl says post as little or as much as you need to or want to. You've got a littlin and now a new job so your not gonna be able to post every day, every month but that's ok aslong as you know we're all here still and we'll be waiting and supporting you as you have me and many others. Keep at the training I'm sure it'll get better. You've done great to get this far now keep it going. Wishing all the best as always.
Thanks all 4 ur support 🙂
So I have been in training this wk and my brain feels totally overloaded with information lol..... Maybe I just have a small brain 🙂
So I have learnt alot about myself this wk, I did not realise at the start of this wk how hard I would find it being out of my comfort zone and in training it has been role play and presentations 1 after another. This is something I have not really done b4 and I have felt so nervous and worried. I almost left on the 2nd day but I really have pushed myself this wk. I don't wanna keep running, just because I am scared of a situation.... I wanna face my fears head on moving 4ward, but that is easier said than done!
I have learnt this wk, that I have no self belief, no matter how well ppl say I am doing, 4 some reason I still don't believe them. I have no confidence in big groups and I never feel like I am good enough or ever measure up 2 others.... this is all cus of my past I think...But I have also learnt this wk that all these things can be changed with time, it won't be easy but I will try my best. The guy who is training us 2day could see that I was worried at the end of the day and he said 2 me that I am doing gr8 and I need 2 just believe in myself and my ability more.... I was honest with him told him the role plays have been sooo hard for me and that I get soooo scared and nervous. He said he did not notice and I had covered it up well. I have also learnt that I am good at this 2 covering up my real feelings just 2 please others, 2 not disappoint and mostly because it's easier 2 build a wall around me than trying 2 explain and let ppl in!
Neway I have stuck at the training this wk and I can honestly say it as got easier. I have made friends with quite a few ppl there already and I feel better than I would of if I ran away. So anything is possible and if u wanna change things with hard work and determination u can.... I am gonna work hard on changing the things I have learnt about myself this wk!
This has turned in2 a ramble but it's helped me writing it all down. I am gonna post some poems that have helped me this wk in a minute 🙂
Still gamble free 🙂
And looking 4ward 2 spending the wknd with my bf and Maddison 🙂
Hope everyone is ok x
If you have no faith
In yourself,
Then you will have no faith
In anybody else.
It takes strength to be firm, It takes courage to be gentle.
It takes strength to conquer, It takes courage to surrender.
It takes strength to be certain, It takes courage to have doubt.
It takes strength to fit in, It takes courage to stand out.
It takes strength to feel a friend's pain, It takes courage to feel your own pain.
It takes strength to endure abuse,It takes courage to stop it.
It takes strength to stand alone, It takes courage to lean on another.
It takes strength to love, It takes courage to be loved.
It takes strength to survive, It takes courage to live.
Wow posted just 10 seconds after each other. Glad you've stuck at it and things have got better. Your doing great - now just believe it!!
Charl this is you 🙂 🙂 all smiles and positive soz for mucking about in chat copying you was only a joke. Hope you know that. Just dont get the use of smiles hahahaha. You are doin well. I look up to you. Take good care. Onwards and upwards.
Hi Charlotte, thank you so much for your post on my diary.
Im made up for you little one, you so deserve all the happiness that comes your way.
Know you'll be mentally exhausted with the new job and the change in routine that all that brings, but just want you to know that I am so proud of you and I admire you for the hard working, determined and successful young lady that you are. You are quite simply, remarkable 🙂
Stand up and take a bow Miss Charlotte.
Take care,
All the best to you, Maddison and your fella
Cameron
Forgot to say, the rockets doing brilliantly Charlotte, thank you so much for asking after him 🙂
hi charlotte
hope you have managed to let the brain rest a little today. i was just reading your post about wanting to run away and hide and building a brick wall that is because when we were gambling that was exactly what we did and what were used to, but that is the old us and although it is hard at times we are fighting through and seeing changes. i honestly think you have more belief and determination than you think.
keep at it and enjoy the weekend
gamble frees the way forward
carl
Charl hope you are alright hun. I look up to you. Keep your chin up. Onwards and upwards.
By the way I hope you get some rest as well like carl said you are a strong person. Onwards and upwards.
Hi Char. Congrats on the job! You have the spark and deserve this! I'll try to stop by on chat but have exams so studying. About 3 and halfs months free now. Great!
Hi Charlotte,
I hope that all is well with yourself. I am now a proud daddy to Sam. He is gorgeous. We are all doing well and remembering the delights of those first sleepless nights again! LOL!
Life is good.
Take care
Dave X
Hi Charlotte
I hope you have had an enjoyable and well deserved weekend break. I bet you are so proud of yourself for getting through your training. It must of done wonders for your confidence...you got through it, you seemed to enjoy it and you also made friends!
I loved your poems Charlotte!
Keep strong lovely x
Jewels x
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