Just why???

I so hope that you get a real sense of pride when you see it, I can’t wait for that day next month with mine and your story is inspirational as this has been a long long battle for you. Hold on to this feeling of hope and optimism, I am. You’ve got this! 🙂

Ok let’s make a deal tracyd, when (not if ) I get to read mine you have to do the same next month

Yes! It’s a deal 🙂 I won’t lie, on the past it’s always been so hard for me to keep control when I actually have money available- even money I “shouldn’t” spend. I’m going to use this site to remind myself of the sadness and shame I feel when I mess up and how much it hurts. You have documented your journey on here so if you feel any temptation, use it to remind yourself of the pain and destruction this vile addiction causes. We are totally doing this!!!

You are close to seeing that you can have control again and it’s a privilege to share your journey with you. 🙂

Tracyd you have given me so much determination I only hope that someone else gives it to you in return. Like you I’m dangerous when I have money but this month I have already seen what I will buy and I’ve even booked a hairdresser (haven’t done that in years!) for 1st feb. My hand on my heart I am going to read that statement. I laughed today a proper proper laugh and I know I haven’t done that for years and it really struck home how miserable I have been. I have a cracking sense of humour that’s coming back to me slowly but surely and I will hold on to that. So jan 31st I’m going to tell you how happy I am after I’ve read that statement and you’re gonna do the same next month. Come on gal we will do this!

It's so good to read this optimism! Keep it up, and in six months time we'll all be laughing!

Awww how lovely! You too are giving me determination, it broke my heart when I read your very first post and it really touched me. I was going to say- get yourself a treat. Hairdressers is spot on! That will also help boost the old self esteem that has no doubt taken a massive bashing! I’m so looking forward to your jam 31st post! Put your first one and that one side by side and see what a warrioress you are ! :))) and lets hope for so much more laughter and fun in your life from this moment on. You deserve it- and please believe that.

lil30- it is indeed lovely to see the optimism and I know we will all be here laughing in 6 months and spurring others on!

Imagine we could all be laughing in 6 months time! It can happen if we make it!

You’re right tracyd I should put my first post on at the end of the month, if I can work out how to then I will but my techno skills are as good as my gambling skills! Pretty @&£@ then! So I’ve planned what I’m buying on payday, new top, dog bed, scented candles for the bath and a mop (as you do!!). Haven’t had a luxury bath in years and years so it’s planned for the 31st (I’ll have normal baths in between!). Literally have no clue why I would could or should be excited about buying a mop but I am, mmm bit bizzare now I’ve said it out loud. My spoilt dog doesn’t need a new bed but I’m buying it just because I can. Anyway roll on the 31st.

Is warrioress really a word????

Hey so sad,

I’m on 14 days today too and just wanted to say well done and keep on going, you can do it! I’ve found that it I pay my bills then take every penny out of my bank I don’t gamble online simply because I can’t. Could be worth trying 🙂 and if you haven’t already please sign up to GameStop!

I don’t think warrioress is actually a real works but I love it and use it often haha. Pamper pamper pamper- love it! We have to be kind to ourselves, it’s so important. I’m seriously on board with that. I spoil my little dog too, so I agree, get him a new bed. Sounds like you are doing really well and I can’t wait to be reading your story months down the line 🙂

Hi Lisa thanks for the advice. Well done to you for getting this far too. It’s amazing how the support on here can keep you going. I’ve never had so much determination and it’s all come from the people on here. You’re all fab!!!!!

Same to you tracyd can’t wait to read yours next month. Oh just imagine getting that happiness back!!

I’m feeling so optimistic and as you say , all the people on here are fab and have given me so much inspiration and determination. I think it’s just nice to see that all those feelings about myself seem to go hand in hand with gambling and that I am not just some useless freak with no willpower. It’s been an eye opener and is SO helpful. 🙂 can’t wait to share my payday story too sosad. I’m going to take advice that’s been posted and draw all money out in cash apart from bills. I have done that in the past and it’s helped. I feel a real shift though and have a sense of belief that I can do this now

You absolutely can do this and you will. I have changed all my direct debits to come out on payday from now on and like I say the leftover is already earmarked. Oh the excitement of buying a mop!!! You were never a useless freak, neither was I or anyone else on this site, we were addicts that are now strong enough to take our lives back. I’ll still call myself stupid til the day I die but I know I didn’t deserve to hate myself the way I did and I’ll never let that happen again. Last night my son asked me if I had a new boyfriend, I laughed and said no why do you think that? He said you’ve got your twinkle back. Made me cry in a nice way sort of, I know it’s not fully back but I do know it’s gettng there. One day at a time.