my betting diary

Thanks my friends.,. Another day goes by ,thats 11 and counting now since i saw the kids..,i am giving the ex as much space as possible as much as its crippling me not seeing them.,..i try to look on the positive side as if i worked offshore then it would be weeks on end...my life just seems very much at a standstill at the minute with the world just passing by if that makes sense...as the saying goes nothing changes if nothing changes so who knows maybe its time to kick my own a r s e and start enjoying life again ... on the ga subject...i do feel that its getting a bit negative publicity on here and deem it a tad unfair that someone new to the diaries could take this into consideration....my own experience is that i tried it a few years back in that it worked at the time (about 3 or 4 months) but i just wasnt ready to stop...what would happen now if i walked in would i get a 6 month badge for my 1st meeting...timed have changed since a few year ago but i find it unfair of its criticism...in fact CHARLY could be one of those being referred to and i have nothing but respect for that diary...a close friend of mine has been going to ga (with his wife) for a few weeks now and in fact has nothing but praise for it as it seems to be saving his marriage...anyways its always going to be up for debate on these diaries but as ive said all along gamcare is NOT ga...each and every one of us shall be different..i cant believe a diary posted tonight they went into a shop to actually lose....today i did not bet tomorrow i wont bet we can do this folks 😉

Hi Post, sorry to read that you have not seen the kids for a while. I know what mental torment and torture your ex is putting you through at the minute mate.

There was a big fire near to me recently and the fire brigade stayed for a day or two to make sure the fire was out--when they realised that the sparks were not going to ignite again they left. I understand that they have not been back but they have had to go to other incidents where there attention was needed.

Life is far too short to waste any time chasing rainbows mate.

All the best pal

Stumper

HI wp,i'm sorry to read that you haven't seen the little one for a wee while,heartbreaking i'm sure,as i have mentioned before though you will get to see her on regular basis in future.I think the biggest decision you have to make at the moment is whether to continue on the path of trying to repair you relationship or drawing a line in the sand, and taking the steps to end that and get on with the rest of your life.Only you can reach that conclusion,whatever you decide you will continue to receive lots of support from many on here who consider you to be a top bloke!!!.

Seano.

Hi wp, you will need the patience of a sain t to read this as still can't see what I am writing and don't know how to go back and correct mistakes!! But I am back and so are you! Well the last two weeks hhave been lovely and sunny but there's been bucket loads of dark stuffflying in both our directions! Hope you are learning to duck! I ha ve borrowed my daughters wii game thing and it's took 7 weeks to get it going! Didn't know you need batterides in something you plug in!That's technology for you lol. Well it's wicked I do the cycling

on it and I am number 1 in the whole wide world!!

Might be a bit wrong about thatas it's only me on it but

it's really good for getting youtoduckand dive wich iSs

handy When that dark stuff hits the fan! I know it's not

aneasy time for you and not seeing the little un must tear you apart but you can stay calm and ride the storm

it seems the longer we stickat our resolve the more

trouble others seem to rake up for us!

I think it's very hard for a person to understand our addictionbut i also think it's just as hard to understand our recovery. Which is why I think your ex/seperated/hanging by a thread partner is acting in

the very selfish way she is. Gambling was a very selfish

way of life for you but you have changed she maybe

wants to hurtyou as much as you hurt her during that

time? Who can blame her really? But if thereis no

forgiveness then really there is no future. Lots on here

have support from their partner and lots have had to

start again on their own but you are left in limbo! I

think stumpers post was lovely a very nice way of

putting a very sincere message. Oh I think I

amgettingcarried away on this touchy screen it's very

quick! so keep it going we will not gamble today and we

can duck from the brownstuff when it hits the fan!! I

have got a lovely tan though!! Lol

glad we are back love linda x x

It took me 1hour 57

minutes to edit four lines out my post to you! I obviously haven't got a clue what I am doing but thought I would remove the risky bit!! Thanks for your support people are probably thinking I am in the wrong but I am not and I won't be intimidated by a sad bully who introduced me to gambling in the first place!! Does anyone anywhere please know how to make the writing bigger on my pod thingy! it's supposed to be top of the range and I am sitting here poking the silly thing with the end of my tweezers and a magnifying glass! Lol

linda x x x

Hi winningpost,

Just wanted to send you an e-hug (((wp))) - my family can be a right bunch of P****s, and proper break my heart, send me doubled over in pain with their nastiness, and even though Ive got a supportive husband to cry on, I had to get sent home from work today cos I was so upset.

The reason Im saying all this is not for self pity but just to say - I know how hard it can be when you are dealing with spitefulness. I think you are doing flamin marvellous with all the upset you are feeling.

Feel proud of yourself! Its the hardest thing in the world to be in pain and not throw the towel in.

We can rise above, because we are mint!

Take care,

f x

Hi wp,how are things today?,i hope your starting to come to some decision about the best way forward for yourself on the relationship front,and of course i hope you have some agreement and a time etc when you will be able to see the bairn?......,i am full of admiration for you wp,even though your life is a real pain in the backside right now you are still on here and offering support and help to others.....,that tells me so much about you mate,and i have no doubt that many others on here agree with me.

Seano.

hi wp, thanks for your posts and support .

i too have my own demons to battle with at the moment, and am encouraged by people like you, who have made a success of their recovery.

Despite all the things which seem sent to test us, you have kept on the right path, i know its not easy and i am impressed that you are doing your best in a nasty situation.

G.A. - i am not involved now, but was a few years ago, and taking everything in to consideration, i would definately give it the thumbs up,and if i had a meeting closer to home, i would go back.

hope all turns out for the best,

tommi

Hi wp.

Hope alls well with you.

Really feel for you mate as far as not being able to spend some time with your kids.But

As ever you give your support no matter how hard you may have it at times.

You've put a smile on many a face here with your posts and support on diaries wp.So keep up the good work.

Stay strong my freind.We will beat this.

Viggo.

Thank you my friends.,here is an update...14 days now since i saw them kids and it is eating away at me though the ex has been in touch asking if i was ok as that fugitive on the loose actually shot a policeman about 150 yards from my flat last weekend.,even tho weve exchanged texts ive not been invited up and im giving her some space so ive been up at my parents (again) since yesterday as my dad is still feeling the effects of his op...will head back down tomorrow as on early start friday...makes me think tho will i be better suited coming "home" part of me says yes whats point of bein miserable down there wi no access and part says no way thats walking away from my responsibility s and maybe one day them kids will need me...interesting posts flying around today on the diaries....personally there is no contest from me...lets think a diary that hasnt gambled for 4 years or a diary that continues to cause pain on themselves and does nae really give a ***** boot anybody else unless they post on his...i ve said timeless times i really feel for that diary but sorry folks some of the dross for the kast few months has done my recovery no good and ive tended to read rather than write on it....in fact maybe im paranoid but a diary lost £700 quid after months of abstinence yet i cant help thinking maybe was influenced by that other diary tho at end of day its up to US whether we gamble or not ..so its down to the diary of 4 years where i get my inspiration from,like i said no contest.,.today i did not bet tomorrow i wont bet 99 % of us can do this folks

hi wp! Didn't really understand a word of your last post but that doesn't matter I just wanted to say hi and let you know I am thinking of you!!

Love linda x x

Very difficult decision for you wp,and i'm sure you will give it a great deal of thought over the next few weeks depending on how things go with your ex,i think if i was in your position i would err on the side of moving home,i'm not sure, but i don't think edinburgh to newcastle is that long a journey by train?....so you would still get to see the bairn oncea week (at least),anyway,i hope you get to see her very soon mate.....,very good suggestion by Linda about the wee postcard.

Seano.

Hi wp

Thanks for the post, wasnt referring to you in my last post but re being in Denial, no siree mate - I dont deny I am a Compulsive Gambler, and that I've found it impossible to stop up to now despite a lot of good advice.

But I do deny any responsibility for ANL losing £700 - not guilty man!

Hey wp,you have never ,not once posted anything that i have found offensive mate :),and remember you put a hell of a lot of effort into the forum,and your working shifts, and all the hours you can get,as time passes and you gradually get in a better place financially and emotionally who knows perhaps this forum will have played out it's role in your life.....that in itself should it happen will be a very positive thing :).

Seano.

It will be a long time before this forum plays out its role in my life mate...the help and support on here is second to none....we can do this 😉