Om Tare Tutare Ture Soha

Warm sunny day on the gamble free road. A time to rejoice and be happy. Together with gamcare friends this is a golden opportunity to address my gambling addiction and go on to live a better life.

Time can be well spent contemplating the merits of a gamble free life and exploring new opportunities with gratitude.

I do need my body, heart and mind working together if I am to enjoy this recovery. Happy days ahead of fun and laughter with a generous sprinkling of peace, love and tranquility.

Hi Stephen, I’m glad to see that things are going well and that you’re enjoying life to it’s fullest. You certainly sound very positive which is important during your road to a gamble free life.

I can totally understand why you’ve stopped counting the days and instead concentrating on living each day gamble. I’ve been tempted to do the same in the past, simple because it sometimes doesn’t feel as though there is any ‘end date’ to the Recovery journey by counting the days. It can also lead you into temptation by saying to yourself, “if I reach X amount of days, I’ll feel very happy and allow myself to gamble again...”. I’ve had those thoughts in the past when checking my day counter. It’s a difficult one, I must admit.

You’re doing fantastically well, Stephen. Keep up the positive mindset. I enjoy reading your diary entries. Always entertaining.

Dan

Hi Stephen, Hope you are keeping well ..... good to see you in a positive frame of mind and ready for the challenges that lay ahead, dont be to hard on yourself and just concentrate on getting through each day as it comes, you have gone for long periods in the past without a bet and you can do so again ......as for keeping a count of your gamble free days do whatever works best for you, we are all different .... keep up the good work you are doing great.

Thank you Dan & Chartom for posting on my diary. I appreciate your support, encouragement and good advice. It pleases me to see you both doing so well.

I have been missing my visits to the gym as it has been closed for 5 days (refurbishment), but it reopens tomorrow so I am looking forward to a bit of cardio and a splash in the pool. The gym has been a real comfort to me when I had no money after gambling binges, I would go there to take my mind off what I had done.

The monthly gym payment fortunately leaves my bank on the same day my works pension goes in so it has always been paid. I also try to put money on my Asda gift card so I can buy food and things. Quite a few acquaintances at the gym who chat about their houses, cars, holidays etc would be very surprised if they knew of the times I struggled just to put food on my table and the debt I am repaying as a result of gambling. A sorry state of affairs really, considering I am nearly 68 and have worked hard all my life. I don't have mental health issues and I am not an idiot so I don't really understand why I persisted in handing over my hard earned money to the betting shops.

Anyway, it's all in the past cos the gambling's over

Not long now i'll be living in clover

It don't cost much to frolic in the sun

I can dance around, smile and have a lot of fun.

Hi Stephen, sounds like you are doing great. The gym is obviously a great sanctuary for you that builds up positive vibes. I can definitely relate to your interactions with acquaintances as my work colleagues and friends would be shocked if they knew about the state of my financial affairs. You are doing really well and you can build up your savings a £1 at a time, enough to keep you out of the red, what other 68 year olds can't necessarily do due to health issues is all the activity and fitness that you do - you can change your situation but many experiencing health issues can't so focus on all your wonderful achievements and celebrate the amazing power of fitness - swimming, salsa ........ they will help to keep you going. I expect many gym acquaintances are a little envious of you! Good luck and keep on the road of the sane! Xx

nice work stephen and loving the poetry. Keep hammering the gym , i love the perspective that you have on life and all things gambling.

thanks also for your kind comments on my diary. Keep on Top , youve taken the power back , now hold onto it my friend.

Many thanks Annie & Shakey. I really appreciate your encouraging posts on my diary.

Today should be interesting, off for a swim later than tonight is my Salsa class which I really enjoy. I struggle with the moves a bit but nobody seems to mind and it's a lot of fun.

The gamble free road is a place I love well

For it leads me away from the gambling hell

Some potholes and hills with quite a few bends

But I've got a diary and support from my friends

Well done Stephen lets do this, lets just not carry cash on us its the only way I and u can gamble so lets block that completely. Money is overatted.

Hi Stephen,

Been a while. Just stopping by to say keep strong, keep going and I really hope you can get to where you deserve to be and follow that gamble free road to freedom.

All the best

Matt

Thank you Adam, Matt and San. I appreciate your support and encouragement.

Hello Diary... Still using my mantras daily to help in my recovery

OM TARE TUTARE TURE SOHA - Green Tara mantra. I see Tara as being my invisible friend who supports and guides me as I seek liberation from negative emotions and mental delusions.

NAM MYOHO RENGE KYO - Mantra to the Divine Spirit asking to be freed from negative karma.

NO MORE THE FOOL I'M GONNA BE COOL - My own mantra/affirmation which I say in my head whilst tapping my fingers.

Morning Diary. I recently listened to 'Ego' by Rag n Bone Man. A good song which paints the ego in a negative way; Chorus....

Bang-bang baby, down you fall

Ain't you mister know-it all

Ego, Ego

Bang-bang baby, down you fall

Ain't you mister know-it all....

Interesting lyrics. Obviously, if the ego gets out of control we have a real problem on our hands but without it life would be quite dull. The Ego works alongside the unconscious mind. It is an individuals perception of what's going on in and around us and gives a sense of our own identity. It can bolster self esteem by helping us to be creative, adventurous and exciting.

To live our lives to the full we need our "Ego" but we must reserve the right to overrule it when necessary. Particularly if it tries telling us we are good at gambling.

Read a Haiku Poem in a magazine so thought I'd try one relating to gambling: It's got to be three lines of 5-7-5 syllables and not rhyming:

Compulsive gambler

Seductively charming fobt

High street damnation

Hi Stephen - you have so much wisdom to give - have you ever thought about writing a book? Thanks for your continued support! Keep going you are doing great!! Xx

Hello stephan, I'm missing the guru challenge and I'm thinking of visiting your page instead or maybe both. I hope that mixer returns, That said, lets just keep on feeding the recovery world at large by doing it odaat. I too have a hard time focusing on days, yet, milestones or markers I can do. Just can't put too much weight on them. In a flash, a 5 year stretch could end with one bet choice. So it's always odaat. odaat. om tara tu tara