Time to stop it all now!

I stopped (not for the first time)  during lockdown.  Before that I had closed all online accounts, but betting shops would be biggest problem as I work in a city centre and shops are almost on every corner.   So basically I had gone 5 months without betting,  but on Monday of this week I stupidly went into a local shop and lost 950.  Been feeling extremely low and let down since .

So hard to shake the habit isn’t it.  I have been at it for countless years.  Stop for several months and then get sucked in again.

i wish you well and hope you find the answers and strength to stop permanently.

Good morning,

Something i knew so well. The curse of the bookies. At my peak it was before work, lunch, after work, weekends etc.

You need to make sure there are blocks in place such as self exclusion. 

However the easiest block is to take as little cash to work as possible and even better if u dont need any. Leave your cards at home also.

No funds = no bet

Best

Hi, you have made the first step by reaching out on here.

All I can advise is what I have done to stop after 5 years of running up a lot more debt than you have. All my gambling was online so I registered with Gamstop and put a blocker called Betblocker on my devices both for the maximum of 5 years.

My wife has took full control of our finances, changing all login details and cancelling my cards so I have no access to any money. This may sound extreme but it needed to be done. Through gamcare I am having telephone counselling which really helps being able to talk about everything without any judgement.

It was really hard going at first but gradually I felt better and now it feels as if a fog has been lifted and I have started to get back to who I was before this all started. My main focus now is trying to repair the damage I have done to my marriage but my wife has been amazing with her support even though she is struggling to come to terms with what I have done. She has also started some counselling.

As a result of doing all the things above I am now 84 days gamble free and it feels great.

Hope this gives you some ideas on how to tackle your gambling but I would also recommend reading other peoples stories which shows you are not alone and everyone is willing to support each other.

It's the old cliche of "one day at a time" but feel proud when you wake up each morning knowing you haven't gambled.

Good luck!

Thanks guys, I know it’s going to be hard and there are going to be very tough days. Feel much more determined this time.

i hope you can all find the strength to keep it up. 

take care

This is my first attempt at stopping.   I haven't gambled since March pre lock-down ... But only just realised last weekend I had a problem, when my wife totalled up all my spending.  @bladesman like yours she has been amazing but likely needs counselling herself. 

So sounds like we are all doing the right thing.  Glad to know we are all in the same boat - safety in numbers! - so I am sure we will prevail!

 Hi , Pauljh

Thanks for posting and well done for not gambling since March , that's really good progress. 

There's support available for your partner and neither of you are alone .  You can contact us anytime on 0808 8020 133 or via our website on our Netline service and we can look at 1-1 support for your wife as you mention . 

Take care 

Kirk 

Forum Admin 

One thing I will add is don’t imagine what your debt could be if you carry on. Because I believe our minds, when caught up in addiction, see a number and aim for it. I know it sounds crazy but it’s true. When I thought of the ‘absolute maximum debt’ I could go to, before I knew it I was past it, if not double. So just have the mindset of stopping NOW. 1 more penny is OVER the ABSOLUTE MAXIMUM DEBT you can imagine. 
Distract yourself with all u can. Take on as much time as u can at work, like me working every day just to keep myself busy and earn more money. It makes u value the little time you have at home, and therefore makes you realise how precious And fragile your life really is. 
Ive been through it all. I’m only 21. Started this and was Completely out of control within 6 months Of turning 18. 3 years later I’ve only just stopped for a few months, but this time I know it’s real. I met my partner, which seemed like a gift from god given how guilty and horrible I felt about my past, and they know about it all. Plus when I relapsed a couple times since being with them. But the fact is the relapses became fewer and far between until I trained my brain to see the good in life. 
getting a bit depressed sometimes to deal with the stress isn’t a bad thing. Just don’t dwell for too long. Listen to music that helps you through that mood, then switch to happy music. You can trick yourself into being Honestly happy Even when you have unimaginable debt. Those moments get you through.

i was thousands and thousands in debt, and I had to work it all off and suffer in between. The mental torture was the worst thing. I’ll explain more if you want me to but I’ve been through a lot and I’ve really come to understand myself me. I think about gambling sometimes looking back thinking what could’ve been during all that wasted time, but I NEVER have the urge. The worst I would ever do again is a little bet with mates for whoever wins a game of golf or something, and I mean a little bet. 
anyways I’m so proud of every minute you stay away from gambling. I have many experiences to share, and ways that I overcome them. Just don’t want to ramble on any more! Cheers, let me know I’m all ears.

Hey 

I managed 2 years off a bet before stupidly going back however I could never lose huge amounts as my wife knew they signs and also monitored the the banks. All the advice above is brilliant advice, I found GAMSTOP very useful and couldn’t find a way around it despite plenty of attempts. 

Take care 

You have to self-exclude...........all bookies even those you don't go into. I've done a 12 miles radius and I was simply driving further to find one that didn't know me. Bloody awful life gambling.