Life after a CG

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Thanks rob

I've made use of various councillors in the past and it's part of what enabled me to pick up the pieces. That and my determination not to let a compulsive gambler blight my life for another second.

Things keep coming along which try to trample me back into the ground but I'll keep fighting with all I have never to go back to the mess I once was. I've come too far now.

I've still a steep hill to climb which has only been added to these last 24 hours but I'll make it.

I'll just keep picking myself up and carry on.

Morning KS

Hey thanks for the post, sounds like you were a bit deflated with it all yesterday

Remember tomorrow's another day and I am sure your world is looking better today

Have a great weekend keeping safe

Stay strong and take care

Suzanne xx

PS coloured my hair last night have gone slightly darker and it' not green lol

but it is a different colour change is as good as a rest

Xx

Hey

Blonde to black too extreme nooo lol

Go a nice easy medium ash blonde,my new colour now

Stress and sun had sent my hair white blonde lol

There is every point,come on,think positive

I know what you mean about work its hard to be at work when we are low and anxious

Think positive use your strengths do something totally out of routine today and surprise yourself

You are stronger than you think

Suzanne xx

Hi

You have just had me chuckling again

Don't colour your hair first it might turn green lol lol

Bring everything on I say we can deal with it

Suzanne xx

KS

You have gone through a very traumatic period in your life, it takes time

Don't do anything hasty in any areas YOU know your moods change

I am pleased you have your Mum to talk to

Look into your heart and make the right choice for you and your family and what you really want

None of us can see into the future but we can see now and today

I don't know your immediate circumstances but I am here for you to lean on

Suzanne xx

The more I think about it the greater the urge to get it done.

Today depression has hit hard.

Today I feel sick to my stomach

Today I am alone with only my thoughts and they're doing me no good.

So today I'm choosing something constructive and it may be a real rash decision to make but one which I feel is a step in the right direction

Today - right now I'm going to go thro every cupboard and drawer and sort stuff out ready to pack. If I've not used it or worn it for 1 year it's going in the bin.

If it holds memories it goes to the skip.

Next week I'm going to quit the job I hate so much lock my house up and move to my mums and sort my life out there.

I really can leave it all behind.

I'm going to take a hypothetical eraser and wipe it all out.

For me now it's the only way.

Shocking how having a CG in my life for so long has left me emotionally & mentally

Not only that but a person I loved unconditionally with all my heart could turn their back so easily

Time to be selfish

Have just posted to you on my thread

You would think I would have the hang of this by now lol

but I am a dizzy blonde still lol

Suzanne xx

What a week last week was. Gladly it's all behind me and I've moved on from it. I know to expect days like it so I've found new things to keep me from getting that low again

I've learnt to cope with huge changes in life. Sometimes I just need to give myself time to accept them I forget I'm human and not a robot.

I know what I want and don't want from my life and I will no longer settle for anything less.

I'm stronger than I think

Hi keep

Thanks for your ongoing support and I am really pleased that your world is so much more positive this week

My job is on hold at the moment I have been going through a process at work for 3 months now, management restructure (yeah right)

I have opted for redundancy and hope I get it (all this wAiting for the outcome is very stressful but it has not even edged me back to wanting to gamble)

I love fresh starts whether it be moving or changing jobs (guess I am quite an optimistic person really, I have to be with the ups and downs of life lol)

We are hoping to be moving next year further down the east coast

Why should we keep taking second best in our lives, we only have one

You are stronger than you think

Take care and be positive

Suzanne xx

Morning and thanks as always Suzanne

Went out last night - first time In a while. Met up with new people and really enjoyed myself.

Think getting out doing new things for me is going to have to become a habit

You really do only get one go at life - no dress rehearsals so don't waste it

Evening diary

A note to self more than anything - today has been a brilliant day. So much fun and laughter I'd forgotten what it felt like

No one has analysed me or talked about my past they've just accepted who I am today and no more than that

All days should be like today for everyone. Full of smiles and no hassle or stress x

Goodnight

The dawn of a new day again brings new things. Work done and dusted for another week allowing some time for me to get what I need and want out of my weekend. Some quality family time a trip to the hairdresser get the car valeted and some much needed clothes shopping ahead of a night out on Sunday - yes I'm being a rebel and going out on a Sunday night haha

I'll probably be full of regrets on Monday morning saying those immortal words "never again" but it's gotta be done so I'm going to enjoy it.

That's what life about. Enjoyment.