Hi everyone,
I will try to keep this short but if your not sitting may as well take a seat! I am 32 mother to 4 children, run a successful business, financially support myself and my children, lovely home, lovely car, lovely partner and basically a lovely life - i feel very blessed. I would advice on the way forward for me and what better place to ask that here. I watched my parents gamble from a very young age, this became part of my life. At first it was £50 in a bingo hall and then the older i got and the more successful i became (more money i earnt) the more expensive my gambling became - I will not walk into a casino without at least a £1000. i am not in debt and have no credit cards or overdrafts, the money i spend is spare money. I do not feel the need to gamble everyday just when large lump sums hit me. the first thing on my mind is gambling. I have been very lucky over the years and 8/10 times i win. I have won up to £15,000 online in one day and £6000 in a casino in one day but rather than feel pleased and walk away I will sit and spend the lot - i will play up to 3 machines in a casino at any one time on £5 bet and online i usually play £20 spins. In my head i am telling myself that my bills are paid and my children are looked after so its ok and that I was prepared to lose that money. over the past few months the feeling i get during and after gambling has changed. I hate it but cant stop myself. Tonight I wagered £3000 online and won £6000 then sat and lost the lot in less than 20 minutes. It makes me feel terrible, i dont have lots of money in the bank and all the extra cash i have is being pumped into machines. I suppose in a way I am trying to justify it to myslef when in the past ten years the realisation of probably spending over 200k makes me feel sick. why cant i be strong like i am in all other areas of my life. i have tried counselling but in all honesty i felt i was being told what i already know and i didnt come away feeling better just annoyed that i had spent money on someone telling me that - so where did i go straight after....yes the casino! i am really starting to think that gambling is just a way of life for me but i desperately need a way out. i could do so much more with my money it sickens me to think i blow the amount i do. I am hoping that someone can give me any advice of what i should do. i am now banned from casinos and have slef banned myself online also but i have done this before and always found a new casino or a new online one. thanks so much for taking the time to read this.
I can really relate to your thread and the amounts you spend gambling and have lost. My story is very similar to yours, my offspring had left home and needed me for nothing, I had a lot of surplus cash (too easy access - not tied up), started gambling 7 years ago, having great difficulty in stopping (approaching critical point now - no debt but only 10% left of a massive cash pot). I could go on and on about me crying about the losses and how gambling should be banned (I often do), but the issue on this thread is that you are 32 (I am 58), and like me you love the 'buzz' because maybe something is missing in your life for you to seek that 'buzz' from gambling (it was and is for me). I have ruined a strong financial base (lets say £K150 down to £K18.5, completely un-recoverable because of my now low take-home pay). For you the question is do you want to end up like me in your later years ? majority of funds gone, having to down-size property to manage (then gamble that away), that is the advice I can give you. Quit - find something else that gives you a buzz - outside work - sport, helping others, fill the void without gambling, or you will end up like me, desperate, anxious, worried, fearful for your financial future. Hope you get chance to read this - Paul
I can totally understand where you are coming from, unfortunately I have not had the money to gamble without penalties i.e. missing vital bill payments & borrowing ( lies are told ) off family etc.I think that there comes a point ,as you have ,to seek help, I joined last night because I knew that I was on a desperate path, it hit me when I transferred 15p from an old a/c so that I would have £10 to deposit , I asked myself " do you want this to be your life ????", I dread the ppostman & the phone calls, so now I am going to stop, if I can ,then I am sure that you can & WILL :)) in fact you are on your way now ,by posting on here. I ,& I am sure everyone else who reads your post will be "Rooting " for you. If something is missing from (or you feel that there is ) your life, try to ask yourself what it is , it may be painful to "hear" the answer, but only then can you sort your life out & have the best life that you can & that you deserve, you are important to every one, so "go sister" ha ha. Love to you , Lulu xx
.....
You can stop if you want to. It all depends on what you want. I openly admit that I would love to go back to gambling. I loved it. The minor fact that I spent the equivalent of 10 years worth of my wages on it, and the bank now owns most of my house is no matter. 🙁
The fact is if I do go back to gambling, in all likelihood I would end up on the streets or worse. My first rockbottom was when I attempted suicide due to my debts. I couldn't see a way out.
You have an opportunity while you are on a good wage to set yourself up for a happy future, and most importantly a comfortable retirement. LOST MY LIFE is 58, I am 57, is this the future that you are after?
You have tried counselling, have you thought about GA?
Get the help and advice that you need to help stop the slide into a life of misery. At the moment you say you are gambling 'spare' money. Don't wait until after you have built up a mountain of debt to finance your gambling. In all probability this is what will likely happen if you don't attack this problem now.
Best wishes
@lulu21 just make yourself over the time believe this line. "In any form of gambling YOUR NOT GONNA WIN. Its all a mugs game. Tell yourself that purposely going out just go gambling is NEVER and NOT a good idea. Firstly dign up to HSBC bank as this is one bank i know that not only offers gambling freeze on your card but offers the longest cooling off period off 72 hours after or should you request the gambling freeze off.
I have been in same boat and my advise is join GameStop and even if you want you cannot bet online. Self exclusion is for 6 month, 1 year and 5 year and even after the self exclusion is over, it's not early/almost impossible to get betting again online.
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
