Hi
My name is SecretSpinner and I am a compulsive gambler.
There, I said it!
Today, I have hit rock bottom, today my journey climbing back up begins.
My story, I assume is similar to everyone else’s. online casinos (slots) WAS my game, although it started with land bingo progressing to online bingo. I confessed all to my husband about 9 years ago, he was great and supportive... strangely my betting stakes those days were minimal compared to now but it still caused me horrendous anxiety as I was losing money I couldn’t afford. I managed to quit gambling for a few years, didn’t really see it as an ‘addiction’ anymore but then it crept back in! It was manageable, didn’t cause me any strain although the guilt was awful. Fast forward to last year... goodness me, I don’t know what On earth happened!? But something did and took over my sanity completely! I lost my mind, in 6 months I have gambled thousands!! The scary part is that I am numb to the feelings of losing and winning... I don’t care.
So this morning, I gambled away my last £1k... I won £800 back which if I’d withdrawn would’ve only had me £200 down, nope I spent the lot again trying to win the extra £200! How pathetic is that!? It makes zero sense to a sane mind. In a way I’m pleased it happen as I wouldn’t be here seeking help and support.
I have today, committed to 5 years gamstop and switched my current account to one with a gambling block! I feel so much better already knowing I’ve made some positive steps towards a better future!
Brilliant start, think of the thousand pounds as the best spent months salary as it got u to the point where u said enoughs enough. Gamstop is great. So u don't go in bookies from march there is a maximum two pound per spin this may however still bw tempting for u so I would suggest excluding from bookies and only taking what cash u need no cards out with u then if u do slip the only damage you can do is miminal . For me it stoped me gambling altogether. Now I'm half year in after two years on here failing miserably. Id like to see u succeed straight away so hence the advice. Welcome to the forum Adam.
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Congratulations secret spinner. wtg. tara2
Thank you Tara.x
Adam, thank you for your reply. I’ve never been one for betting shops, I don’t feel comfortable in them but having said that... now I’ve committed to Gamblock and can’t access online slots my addiction could take me there so I will be very careful. I’m hoping that the power of mind, knowing I can’t use online casinos will work for me!!
I will continue to hang around the forums reading and learning to give me strength.
Well done on your journey so far! That’s amazing!
Well done SS great decision - good advice given all round! My own story changed when I started to read about “never being able to win” so why gamble! I’ve always thought “next time” i feel as if my mind thinks why bother I can’t win! Seems to take the stress away! Just a technique I read in Allan Carr’s book! Good luck keep posting!
Hi Secret Spinner
Welcome to the site and good luck on your gf journey. You mentioned in one of your posts that you changed your bank account to one which blocks gambling? Can I ask what account/which bank as I think this would be really helpful to me.
Thanks
Bex
anon1982 wrote:
Hi Secret Spinner
Welcome to the site and good luck on your gf journey. You mentioned in one of your posts that you changed your bank account to one which blocks gambling? Can I ask what account/which bank as I think this would be really helpful to me.
Thanks
Bex
Hi Bex
I done some research as I was desperate to find something physical to stop me in my tracks. Monzo & Stirling are online banks which let you block certain transactions. I signed up to Monzo but through sheer desperation I didn’t read the reviews! They were shockingly bad so I cancelled it and then found out that Barclays has a transaction blocker! Hallelujah! So I’ve switched to Barclays and once my card arrives I can set up the app and then block all gambling transactions. Hopefully this and gamstop will be enough to help me as my vice is online gambling. Hope this helps.x
Jappy wrote:
Well done SS great decision - good advice given all round! My own story changed when I started to read about “never being able to win” so why gamble! I’ve always thought “next time” i feel as if my mind thinks why bother I can’t win! Seems to take the stress away! Just a technique I read in Allan Carr’s book! Good luck keep posting!
Thank you Jappy
You are completely right, I cannot win neither... I used to win and withdraw, it was great! Then it got to the point I was winning but continued playing for entertainment purposes during boring lonely 12 hour shifts at work, which of course started the ‘ chasing the losses’ pattern. I once won £3k from a £200 stake but played through it all again justifying it as only losing £200, I don’t think about what good I could do with that money, the treats I could buy! Hell I could’ve had 2 weeks in Mexico all inclusive for that! It’s sickening. No more though, I am DONE. I will pop over to your thread and have a read, well done on your journey so far and keep up the strength.x
Hi guys
Today is day 10 I am GF. I have Also made it 6 days past payday!! Wooop.
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