Hi everyone, like most of you I guess, I know I have a problem but choose to find ways
to keep on gambling.
Why do I gamble? well first of all that amazing high I get every time I place a winning bet is incredible.
My legs shake, my heart races, adrenaline is pumping and before I know it its over, I have to feel like this again.
While all of this is happening nothing else in the world matters, absolutely nothing, I like this place.
But we all know this does not last, and the depression that follows is sickening and suicidal.
About 7 months ago I was stressed and experiencing problems in life and I thought to myself I know exactly where to go to get away from this.
After spending about 48 hours in the Casino experiencing the highs and lows, I lost around 8 thousand pounds.
I just walked out and threw up everywhere, I was crying and felt worse then ever, I also felt I had no where to go. I went home and slit my wrists with a razor blade.
I don’t remember much of the first few days after that incident, but I eventually came around and I was still here. It was very much a wake up call to stop gambling and I have been getting better over the last few months.
But lately I have been getting those old feelings back again and I am worried I will go back down that same old road again.
That is my story and I thought I would share it with you.
Mad world
Hi Mad world - Thank you for sharing your story with us. You certainly don't want to go back to that scenario again do you, so please try to put some barriers in place to prevent you from further temptation. Can you self-exclude from the casino you use? If you use onlne slots, self-exclude from those and install a blocking software program such as K9 or GamBlok.
You talk about the highs of winning - try to remember how fleeting they are and how they simply draw you into losing even more money. That is the hidden trap of the gambling industry. Believe it or not, there are even better 'highs' out there - by taking up new activities and interests: sport, exercise, getting out and about in general - going back to interests you used to have before gambling took over your life.
Next, make sure you visit this site as much as possible and engage with other people on here. You will find loads of support, encouragement and inspiration from the stories here and I'm sure you will find it a real help.
Best wishes for your journey.
Joanna
Hi,
Welcome to the forum and thanks for posting.
It sounds like a horrific situation to be in, to the point that you had this suicidal ideation. It is good that you are appreciating the chance that you have to do what you want to do, and I can hear that you want to not gamble, and with the sense of the gambling urge appearing you have found the need to come for help, Well-done.
There is help. people have been able to stop so can you, your determination to work on your recovery is what will help you.
I am hearing that you gamble from the Casinos, whether you gamble online or from base there are strategies that you can put in place to make it less easier for you to gamble or to stop which ever you choose to do.
We also give free counselling from most areas in the country, through counselling you would be able to look at the underlying reasons why you gamble, and what the sensations that you described you get from gambling may be coming from.
You may have noticed that there is a lot of support on this forum, a lot of people have found being on the forum and actively getting involve very helpful, you would benefit a lot from starting your own diary if you would like to keep a record of how you are doing whiles you are not gambling or how you are managing the urge to gamble. Here you could also get others who have been where you are before posting on your diary to support you so you will not feel alone in your recovery journey.
You can also join our chatrooms that are run in the evening between 7pm and 10pm, this is announced on this forum everyday so you can check and see which chat you would like to join and you would benefit from the amazing support and the friendliness people show each other in the chatroom.
There is also gamblers anonymous meetings, they are group meetings that are run from many areas in the country
Whatever you would like to do, you can talk to one of our advisors on our Free Helpline on 0808 8020 133
You can also Chat to us on our Netline on: http://secure.gamcare.org.uk/netline/
You do not have to be alone in this. We are all here to support you.
Regards
Florence
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
