It's finaly come out

You aren't alone. You can recover from this. You've already started.

Have you found which GA meeting is closest to you yet? There may be a gamanon meeting for your husband to get some support too if he wants that.

Keep talking.

I do feel very alone, but I do know that I can recover day by day... We have had the GA telephone numbers from the mental heath team which we will look into soon.

Thanks

Yes you have to look at that moment as your lowest point and that this is a new start. I know this is hard but you have taken the first steps and you can recover from this even if now it feels impossible. There are so many supportive people on this site who will help you through this. Read their advice and take what works for you. You are not alone and let this be the start for you of your new life and recovery. Good luck.

Good luck in recovery your first post reminds me abit of a little ove a year ago of the start of tackling my problem good luck and look forward to reeding about your progress all the best dan162

Hi Cms70 welcome to recovery 🙂

So very glad your family found you when you were not thinking straight! My sister (who is no longer with us due to illness) made an attempt on her life after getting into money troubles & we were very fortunate her partner came home sick from work & found her! (I was gutted that she had not come to me & angry that she had potentially deprived her children of her mother so I imagine your husband will be really hurting right now!) I put a plan in place to help her & then left her there in hospital & I expect toddled off to gamble despite seeing that...It is an addiction that knows no boundaries! & just because you hit rock bottom doesn't mean you are suddenly cured! There is no cure to compulsive gambling, recovery is a lifestyle choice that we must choose everyday & being in recovery, we know that we have no other option! Don't wait another second to ring GA if that is the road you plan to go down! I know you have no money but you need blocks up to break the Time-Money-Location triangle (as removing 1 will prevent the gambling) once you are back on your feet again!

You will find unwavering support on here & you can do this - ODAAT

By all means ring GA they will ask you to attend a meeting. I have never meet anyone who left their 1st meeting who didnt feel a huge burden had been lifted. That here there were people who had lived your life had done the things you have but have came out the other side. The greatest thing GA will give you is HOPE

The have never forgotten the smile on my husbands face when he walked out of his first GA meeting.

I didnt want to be there, it was his recovery, all about him, but he wanted me to wait outside in case it all got too much, but as it turned out he wanted it to go on forever, the relief was profound and as day@atatime says, the hope is priceless.

Make a GA meeting a priority.

Gamanon had the same effect on me too, so I would recommend it for gamblers loved ones every time.

Thanks guys,

A lot of good advise for me to take in... I haven't gambled now since 24 dec and don't even have the cravings to! I think the gamberling was another way to try and resolve my debt issues which ive had all my life... Been to citizens advise today and had a lot of support there so hopefully it's the step in the right direction I need....

Now I need to try and put my relationship back on track as my husband have been affected big time by my lies, deceitful ness, and secrets.

I don't know how long this will take as at the moment he doesn't love me, or have no trust in me which is understandable even though it's killing me....

It will take time but you have done a lot already. The feelings of shame and guilt will gradually disappear and things will get better. Just stay strong and keep going day by day. The only way is up!

Hi Cms70, I bet what you are saying about your husband not loving you is your mind playing tricks on you because it sounds like he is still with you?! The trust, is something else altogether & you will have to earn that, which you can by accepting all of the support that everyone has to offer & staying away from gambling! As you know, it doesn't improve our money problems it adds to them! I know you are hurting right now but the longer you don't gamble for, the clearer your mind will be & you are doing brilliantly with about 6 weeks 'clean' 🙂

We are all rooting for you to find your strength! Keep your chin up - ODAAT

Thanks ODAAT,

You always seem to have good advise for a lot of people on here, yes my husband is still with me and he have assured me that he ain't going anywhere, which is a big relief as he is my rock, my life, my everything.

Going to go back to work on Monday as we need the money, and I need my life to get back to some normality.

Thanks for the support 🙂

Not gambled since 24 December 2014.... And don't even feel like gamberling!

It's 3 weeks now since it all come out and I feel that me and my husband are no further on then then, he still has a go at me most days about the money I gambled, how if it wasn't for me we wouldn't be in this position! I do know that and I'm working 2 jobs for us to have extra cash... ( as my husband have been laid off from work).

Any advise to get over this would be a great help! As I feel I can't cope with life anymore.....

Hi Cms70,

It may be very painful but you may just have to ride out the storm.

You have to prove to him that you are worthy of his love and FORGIVENESS.

It sounds to me as though the whole situation has got you down (perfectly natural under the circumstances).

If I were in your shoes I'd see my GP. It may may that you need counselling and or antidepressants.

Once they kick in the drugs will make life seem less harsh and it will give you some "breathing space".

Talking to a trained counsellor will help you come to terms with the situation.

Should your husband become depressed a similar course of action may be necessary for him.

In time your husband will forgive you. It's an old saying but time is a great healer.

Don't beat yourself up too much. Life is too short. Believe me I've been on this earth a lot of years. Time passes very quickly the older you get.

Any way I hope my post has not sounded like a "sermon". It's not meant to be. I just wanted to offer some practical advice.

Bye

Thanks for the comment,

I am currently on anti depressants and have been for 18 months, however, I did see the GP last week and he did up my dosage don't really feel any different tho!

He also give me some diazepam to calm me down, but my husband thinks that I'm just running away from the suitation by taking them, I am currently waiting for the mental health team to refer me for some kind of counselling / treatment but I know that might take a while!

I try and stay possative but then my husband gets anoid because he thinks that I am just berrying my head in the sand ( as I have done in the past about my debts)

Don't really know what to do for the best, as I can't seem to do right from wrong atm...