My story

Posting again before my first thread is even approved LOL. I have just gone in and set my app deposit limit to £25 per week. I debated between cutting off all together but i’ve allowed myself something. I will see how i get on. Regardless i will be saving hundreds a week, and i’m so so excited for that. I am going to set up my own (secret) calendar to mark my days gamble free. I can’t wait and need to slowly pay off any debt and have money in my account each month. Speaking this out for the first time has been a reality check. I need this change. I’m excited for it now but i don’t know how i’ll feel tomorrow when my pay hits my bank account

My partner is a gambler and I saw him win 100s in a matter of spins. I was gambling like you for a matter of months and to be honest I was walking away with alot for the first few months 800 here 500 just off putting in 20£ I got lucky. But the luck fizzled out to the point I wanted that 800 win again so when I won 200 it was minor and I wanted more. I put 200£ into it!! I'm a mum with rent a bills to pay so I thought to myself what am I doing? Like seriously I lived just fine before gambling so why now can't I live okay. So I deleted my accounts. I tried the limited deposits but seeing as u can just change it so easily it didn't make a difference to me. The only way to be done is to be done. Delete it all from your life and get yourself back on track with your financial situation it's not easy I'm still not living great because of the debt I got in from gambling but I'm not wasting anymore money on sky casino. I reall hope you find the strength xx

My advice is to stop.

Ive pretended for over 20 years that I’m in control. I’ve set limits. I’ve set rules for myself, but always the same outcome.

The fact that you’re here and say yourself that you need to stop suggests something isn’t right. You ready for the hard truth: you’re a compulsive gambler and you can’t win.

Im now 150+ days gamble free fir first time ever. Like you, I was in denial and that’s exactly what you are. Sounds harsh but I wish someone had told me straight sooner.

please have a read around the forum and do whatever is right for you, but by doing the same (over a 2 yr period of pretending I wanted to quit) I discovered that totally stopping, removing opportunities and reflecting on the past are the only ways to recovery. Yes....recovery. It’s an illness.

if you’re in control why are you here?

I wish you well and will keep an eye on your progress

I don’t think i have control - that’s why i am here. I’ve not been pretending to quit and yesterday had the severe realisation that i WAS in denial for a long time. I’ve come on to admit that i know i have a gambling problem, i know that truth and have for a while. I have my £25 limit set and haven’t thought about using it at all today, my pay day! I’m entirely focussed on what else that £25 will get me this weekend and having the control to let that sit in my account and not gamble is actually very rewarding. 

Day 1 - feeling great

thank you for your comment!

Thank you for your comment, i appreciate it. Maybe I will stop completely very soon. Today has been very good, not thought about gambling that £25 limit at all. Looking ahead at what else that can get me maybe over the weekend! Today i’ve learnt that i do have some control and that’s rewarding, and i’m going to keep working on it. 

Hopefully will hear from you again.

thanks!

Hi 1994 .

First and foremost welcome to the forum . 

In the nearly 4 year's since I came here I've seen many members wish they could control their Gambling , they almost wished they could just stop losing instead of giving up gambling completely and I get that totally as although I've not had a bet in all that time, there are also day's where I would like nothing more than to be able to have a family day at the  races or a night at the dogs just for fun . 

The trouble is I know for me it wouldn't be fun and if I acted on those thought's I'd be right back where I was in an instant and that's not a place I ever want to return too .

There's a line between Controlled gambling and Compulsive Gambling that once it's crossed can never be undone so I would always say to someone new here, the only way to stop losing is to stop completely and that honesty with your loved ones should also be at the front of the fight . 

You like us all have choices as to what you want to do going forward and there should really be no judgement whatever you choose to do on a forum built first and foremost as a place of safety and where support should be unconditional , I'm also sure that if you stick around and read other people's diary's on here and also those on the family and friends section, where you'll get a really good insight into how we as compulsive gamblers affect not only our own live's but also of  the ones we love .

Hopefully in time you'll make all the right choices along the way .

Wishing you well my friend 

Alan  

Hi Alan,

Thank you for your reply and welcome. I appreciate it. Like i said this is the first place i’ve shared any of this, when it comes to honesty with loved ones - I don’t know where to begin with telling anyone, or if I should if i can overcome this myself. Thankfully my gambling has never impacted anyone else in any way, no one would suspect for a second that i have this problem. My relationships with friends and family are healthy, and I am single so no shared finances and such.

i’ve read a couple of threads here so far, i’m definitely going to have a good read tonight

Thanks!