cut a long story short
ive flirted with gamberling on and off for years bookies/online and never bet on sports
yes thats right the evil machines/slots
im currently on the mend from a cornea transplant
( i now have a dead persons eye technically)
anyways i said to myself and my girlfreind who also is unlucky to have a alcholic mum on the road to recovery who is doing good, which has a sponspor etc and gave me the idea to join hear. i said to my sweet girlfreind who is well out my leauge i will never bet again i promise but that was yesterday
i woke up this morning having been underpaid by my boss which got me angry at first but i thought a sneaky £10 bet wont hurt anyone. i was wrong i got to 4pm without even thinking about betting on jackpotjoy and was clean well clean for 5 hours
it hit 4am deposit after deposit left me with nothing
so here i am the fresh walk ahead. all i feel is hate/shame/ and guilt
how long will it be next
be nice im new
peace
.......
That message one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me, im so glad i havecome here, who knows i could maybe work with gamcare at festivals and other promo places to raise awareness but lets crawl before i walk
woke up today feeling numb and down but todayhas turned out plesant, i built sandpies and castles with my neice in the sun. Also ate ice lollys, this is my first day of many days of recovery and it feels great
Phatsuff, how you getting along with combating your addiction? Have you been continuing to gamble or managed to find help in the way of councelling or further help from friends/family?
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