My wife first confronted me regarding my gambling around 4 years ago and I promised to stop. I did stop for a while however slowly started to fall back into old habits betting inplay on football matches after she went to bed at night.
It came to a head last June 2018 after she found out i had been gambling again and sent me a picture of her hand without her wedding ring saying it was staying off until i got help. I immediately self excluded from all the various sites i was using for a minimum of 6 months.
Then in February this year i failed in an attempt to get a mortgage despite the fact i have a secure job and good income due to having a lot of outstanding debt from gambling. In my infinite wisdom I started gambling again telling myself that I could win some money and clear some debts . One thing led to another and I've since added to my debt with a new loan and another credit card, I also came out of my work pension telling myself that I would use the extra money to repay my debts instead I have just gambled the extra money that I have coming in.
On Saturday 30th April my wife confronted me again as she had found the letters regarding the loan and pension. I can't believe I have let all this happen again and feel sick at having let my wife down again and don't know if she will ever trust me again.
On Saturday I signed up to gamstop and have excluded for 5 years and showed the proof to my wife. I am still trying to get my head round why I have this weakness even though I know it affects my whole family life and my mood.
The journey starts here and I am hoping to keep checking in here for help and support.
Hi 399 you can always call gamcare and get some free counselling. A GA meeting? If you want to prove to your wife and most importantly yourself, you need to start showing her. When you try and give up gambling you need real support. Get your blocks in place and find a new pastime.
Hi,
The bottom line is that you are a compulsive gambler and you will continue to gamble and succumb to this awful disease until you put the correct blocks in place, start being honest with yourself and loved ones, and start helping yourself.
You've joined Gamstop which is a good move, but have you self excluded yourself from all local bookies? As a CG you will likely try and find another way to gamble so make sure you cover yourself.
Have you sat down and owned up to your wife about everything? When you gamble? Where you gamble? How much you owe? Be honest about absolutely everything because your wife deserves to know, but it will also lift a massive weight off your shoulders. I handed over control of finances to my partner and cut up my cards. I carry a little bit of cash with me just in case. I allowed my partner to have sight of my experian account so that she can see any loans/CC's I have and any more that I could attempt to get.
Go to a GA meeting on a regular basis. There is nothing better than face to face contact with others in the same situation as you. It really does help.
You have to want to quit mate, and you can. I always felt it was impossible but with the right actions in place it can be easy, but as I say you have to WANT it.
Good luck you can do this!
I have owned up everything I owe to her and wrote down all my debts and monthly payments. I never go into bookies and only thing I was betting on was football,following several so called tipsters and chasing the dream of turning a small amount of money into a large sum without processing the large amount of money I was losing in the process.
The strange thing is I don't miss betting when I know I can't do it having self excluded , as I read somewhere else it was almost a relief my wife finding out and knowing I had to put an end to it.
I am going to try chatting online to someone as don't think I could face going to Ga meeting.
I will also give my cards over to my wife and just get an allowance for each month. Also looking to get back into golf this year and spend more time with mates as I feel this would give me a new healthier focus for my spare time .
Well it's been over a week since I self excluded and have been checking in on this site regularly and reading other people's stories.
Don't feel I am in a position to comment on others situations as only just starting on my own recovery. Didn't even bother to watch the grand national at the weekend despite probably having had a (fun) bet on it every year since I was just a boy.
Contacted gamblers anonymous as well and had a good chat with an advisor on there. Great there is so many people out there offering help and advice just wish I had sought help before now.
Well it's been over a week since I self excluded and have been checking in on this site regularly and reading other people's stories.
Don't feel I am in a position to comment on others situations as only just starting on my own recovery. Didn't even bother to watch the grand national at the weekend despite probably having had a (fun) bet on it every year since I was just a boy.
Contacted gamblers anonymous as well and had a good chat with an advisor on there. Great there is so many people out there offering help and advice just wish I had sought help before now.
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