I am on this site yet again! It must be about 3 years since I have posted and tonight after a major loss I have decided that as from 1st march I will no longer throw my money into machines. I have had years and years of gambling on the slot machines and guess I must have lost in excess of 100,000 over the years, had inherited money and had a lump sum pension and now have nothing left, in fact I owe 3,000 to credit cards, so it has come to the point that I have to stop! Sorry waffling now. But hi, I am on here as Bandit, but have also been known as Juliette. I need all the help I can get, so it's onward and upward, DAY 1 tomorrow and will start diary
Hi Bandit
Welcome back to the site and I hope things improve for you, as I'm sure they will because you have come to the decision that you want the gambling to stop.
I only joined the site last week and already I have found it of so much help, reading other posts from people also caught up in gambling addiction...and just knowing that I am not alone in this.
I wish you well...I have also reached the point of knowing that no matter what I HAVE TO stop gambling...win or lose it has the same bad affect.
I had stopped for 3 months and saw how much my life improved from an emotional aspect and even how my appearance improved!
Then I had a slip after my boyfriend ended our relationship (nothing to do with gambling)...when I had that slip I won a very large amount of money...more than I've had in a long time, thousands infact. I decided to treat it as a good bye gift from the casino and to never gamble again....pfffffft what a joke that was, as I put some of it to good use but most of it all went back in to the machines over time....I realised all it had done was sucked me back in. Last week when it was all spent back I was so low and kicking myself for being so stupid. I thought how I could have bought a great holiday out of it...a new kitchen even...etc etc
BUT I have accepted that I have a gambling compulsion and so for someone like me it's not as simple as that.
It's now back on the wagon for me and I accept that win or lose I can never ever gamble again...period!
It's such an emotional disease for me especially I find that, and so I have to watch for my triggers and try to put other healthy thing in place instead of gambling.
I also have a massive fear of being broke, so for me winning gave me a huge euphoric feeling...BUT it was shortlived as the very thing I turned to, to help me not be broke has actually left me in that position.
Onwards and upwards with you now Bandit, and I wish you all the best.
Thankyou so much Allaahan for your words, I was so positive when I wrote that then been doing awful since. Not a good place to be,
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