Its never too late

Over the last 18 months gamberling has beaten me. Always felt that i was in control of my gamberling until 1 night in march my battle with depression and gambling finally collided. I was a shop manager for the largest high street bookmaker in the uk so was well aware of the issues surrounding gamberling. I never let my own gamberling get in the way of me doing my job and was always proactive in helping customers with issues before they became too serious. 18 months ago my life began to fall apart. Working all hours my marriage feel apart and i fell into a deep depression. Over the 8 months the gamberling took over i was spending every spare minute gamberling either online or in shop. As the gamberling got worse so did the depression witch lead me to try take my own life. February of this year i reached out to my employer after breaking down hoping they could help as i knew they had the tools to do so. I took steps myself used gamstop did a moses self exclusion and got gamban. My employer helped with health management great or so i thought. Explained the issues i was having especially the gambling issues with working in a gamberling environment. After a 20 minute meeting i was deemed healthy enough to run a bookmakers shop as manager. I raised issue with the bosses but to no luck. On this night in march i received a call from the ex saying i would never see my daughter again. That was it i was working and my normal distraction was gamberling. Unable to do this i started playing the fobts in the shop i was managing and started to remote load credit from my till. I didnt care i just wanted to ruin myself wanted to lose my job the last thing that got me up in the morning. The self destruct button had been pushed. Leaving that evening i got into. A friends car and broke down the next thing i remember im awake in hospital after another failed overdose attempt. After spending 3 weeks in a mental hospital i was finally ready to face upto what id done and the people i hurt. Coming clean to my girlfriend my family and my friends and with their love and support im beating this addiction and am starting to feel like the old me. As for work its now August and im still on suspension. I take full responsibility what i did that night and make no excuse but do feel let down as if they would have reacted to my cry for help i may still  be working to this day. We work to 3 listening laws 1 is to protect children and vulnerable people asked in one of my meeting if a suicidal member of staff came under that law and the reply was its a grey area we will look into it. I know as ive been told i will be sacked maybe rightfully so but im trying to push through change to protect other vulnerable members of staff so they dont end up like me. Facing upto an addiction is never too late reach out to those that love you don't hide what you do dont suffer in silence like i did. Help is out there take the first step. As for me im 2 months gamberling free my mental health is on the up i look forward to a new day. Remember the world is a better place with you in it. Dont let gamberling destroy your life. Its It's never too late to beat it. All the best to everyone much love