Just wanted to write something down, I have managed to stop gambling for 143 days until the last few days where I relapsed and spent all the money I had saved in the last 4/5 months.. I know there are various triggers, I need to try and learn from them all the time… this time I was feeling really down and alone and negative about my life and how I have messed everything up… I stood next to the machine for 15/20 mins fighting the urge and I just gave in. Knowing full well this would be the result.. I am able to go 3/4 months quite easily and I always seem to need to mess it up.. I lost a lot of money and now I have to start again for the 1000th time… it’s just sad I can’t progress with my life. Although I have only had 3 bouts of gambling in the last year each time I end up back at 0 so it’s the same result.. I just feel very low right now but I have to find the strength to carry on… I did so well, it’s the finances that c*****e me.. I have worked so hard all my life and have nothing to show for it. I really need to do something different this time. Sorry just needed to vent my emotions I guess. Hope everyone is staying away from this horrible addiction.
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