Again, considering how much I have lost in the past, it doesn't seem a lot. But....it IS a lot. Imagine losing ВЈ75 a week every week for a year. That's £3900 a year. It's a ridiculous amount of money.
The October before last, I went without alcohol for a month. I thought THAT was going to be difficult but in comparison to this, that was easy. I raised £139 that all went to charity. It felt like a breeze doing that. With gambling, I am finding it hard to go a couple of days. There is literally only one website I can use with is Sky Bet. All I have to do is self exclude but I actually don't want to....I want to go a month without. That would be a start. All I have to is go on the "take a break" option.
It doesn't matter how much it is - it'll never seem like a lot when you compare it what you have spent in the past, because the amount you have spent in the past is continuously growing, and that's because you keep adding to that amount by spending even more.
Basically there are two ways to stop anything - internal control or external control. It's a savage and insidious addiction so internal control is insufficient. Most of us on here cannot control it ourselves so we have to use external controls or blocks like self-exclusion, GamStop, GamBan, etc and handing over control of finances to someone else. It's better done sooner rather than later and it's kinder to yourself in the long run rather than fighting endless battles on a daily basis.
There's lots of support on here to help you.
Hello XM,
You've said it yourself you don't want to stop. I spent years in that position but i didn't reach out for any help because i was the same, deep down i didn't want to stop. Recording losses isn't going to help or make you feel better. You need to want to stop, there is never "literally only one website we can use" if we still want to gamble we will find a way. You need support to stop, the amount of which is needed might be different for each person but people can't stop for us. When you want to stop there is help but YOU have to want it, YOU have to ask for it YOU have to be honest if only at least with yourself. The advice is out there. There is hope, its not easy and for us CG its been our lives for so long it can leave us feeling empty even once we stop. Thats why you need to be tough with it, thats why you need support and thats why you REALLY have to WANT to stop and stop just hoping you might.
All the best.
sjw wrote:
Hello XM,
You've said it yourself you don't want to stop. I spent years in that position but i didn't reach out for any help because i was the same, deep down i didn't want to stop. Recording losses isn't going to help or make you feel better. You need to want to stop, there is never "literally only one website we can use" if we still want to gamble we will find a way. You need support to stop, the amount of which is needed might be different for each person but people can't stop for us. When you want to stop there is help but YOU have to want it, YOU have to ask for it YOU have to be honest if only at least with yourself. The advice is out there. There is hope, its not easy and for us CG its been our lives for so long it can leave us feeling empty even once we stop. Thats why you need to be tough with it, thats why you need support and thats why you REALLY have to WANT to stop and stop just hoping you might.
All the best.
Yeah I know. It's really difficult. I'm currently worried about what lengths I would go to just to gamble if I blocked myself from everything.
Redeemed wrote:
It doesn't matter how much it is - it'll never seem like a lot when you compare it what you have spent in the past, because the amount you have spent in the past is continuously growing, and that's because you keep adding to that amount by spending even more.
Basically there are two ways to stop anything - internal control or external control. It's a savage and insidious addiction so internal control is insufficient. Most of us on here cannot control it ourselves so we have to use external controls or blocks like self-exclusion, GamStop, GamBan, etc and handing over control of finances to someone else. It's better done sooner rather than later and it's kinder to yourself in the long run rather than fighting endless battles on a daily basis.
There's lots of support on here to help you.
Yes it's very true. I'm recording every bet and how much I lose because reading back on it as well as others reading too may help me stop. This site is pretty amazing and the help and support you receive as well as the help and support you can give is just incredible.
I kept a spreadsheet for 3 years and when I look at it nowadays it just seems sheer waste and irresponsibility on my part. Not talking massive sums, I can live with what I spent, but even so 5k over 3 years is bad enough and extremely irresponsible for someone on my low wages with no savings.
One thing it did show me was the pattern. All decent wins were always followed by an equivalent loss. So if you win, you have to stop, and if you're losing you have to stop, so you may as well just save your time and energy and money and stop altogether.
Have you tried the chatroom - it's really good.
Redeemed wrote:
I kept a spreadsheet for 3 years and when I look at it nowadays it just seems sheer waste and irresponsibility on my part. Not talking massive sums, I can live with what I spent, but even so 5k over 3 years is bad enough and extremely irresponsible for someone on my low wages with no savings.
One thing it did show me was the pattern. All decent wins were always followed by an equivalent loss. So if you win, you have to stop, and if you're losing you have to stop, so you may as well just save your time and energy and money and stop altogether.
Have you tried the chatroom - it's really good.
It is a massive amount of money five thousand pounds. And I agree about the decent winnings being followed by an equivalent loss. I think that's why I'm keeping the amounts written on here so it kind of shows and maybe will help myself and others.
I haven't been on the chat. I went on last week and there was only me and the moderator on for about ten minutes so I left.
It really used to annoy me, the fact that decent winnings did not go on to generate any further wins. As all my gambling was done entirely on online slots, I concluded that the systems were rigged somehow (maybe with an algorithm attached to deposits, or an algorithm attached to large wins which then reduced the RTP to zero.) I do not for one minute believe that the RNG is really random. But none of that matters as the only guaranteed way to win is to stop altogether and keep your money safe. So that's what I have done and 5 weeks on it feels much better.
Well done on your GF day.
And maybe try chat again a bit later into the session, there's more chance then of more people having arrived. I go on there quite a lot, it would be nice to see you. Loads of non-judgmental support, it really helps.
Magnetism wrote:
Hi XM,
Thanks for the support on my diary.
This site can help a lot. Real gamblers and people who totally understand gambling addiction are visiting this forum daily. I think it is such a shame that the media, government and public turn a blind eye on what has happened in this country over the past decade when it comes to gambling and the traps that have been set. I guess the best thing we can do is try our best to not place any more bets.
I do completely agree. It's absolutely disgusting that the government has indeed turned away from the cause of the awfulness that gambling has become. Bookies are everywhere preying on the weak and then you get payday loan lenders opening everywhere too. So many people are falling into debt and depression because of gambling alone.
You mention this awful habit mate and recognise how depressing it is, yet you choose not to give up? Writing down losses etc is nuts as I can tell you the end result will always be the same, you lose.100% stop these thoughts and change your mindset from a life of gambling to wanting to do something else.Why are you gambling? Ask yourself that, please stop
Redeemed wrote:
It really used to annoy me, the fact that decent winnings did not go on to generate any further wins. As all my gambling was done entirely on online slots, I concluded that the systems were rigged somehow (maybe with an algorithm attached to deposits, or an algorithm attached to large wins which then reduced the RTP to zero.) I do not for one minute believe that the RNG is really random. But none of that matters as the only guaranteed way to win is to stop altogether and keep your money safe. So that's what I have done and 5 weeks on it feels much better.
Well done on your GF day.
And maybe try chat again a bit later into the session, there's more chance then of more people having arrived. I go on there quite a lot, it would be nice to see you. Loads of non-judgmental support, it really helps.
I was thinking the same thing! There has GOT to be some kind of algorithm. I do genuinely believe that to be true.
I will try the chat tomorrow.
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