A new dawn

A lot going on.. Work on that alone time next week and how to cope. 

You have us.... We are perhaps only virtual but we can help with the struggle. 

You will surprise yourself how you cope.. You  are preparing and know traps you could fall into.. 

At the end of the day we have to regain some handling of money yours has just come out of the blue and rocked the boat a bit. Don't fear money. You will like I have learn to respect it again.. That said I have been a little frivolous a couple of times. But it's gone on things needed not to make the gambling industry richer.

I've every confidence in you.. As for filling your time. Work might be so busy you will tire easily.. 

As for your counselling I am pleased it's going well 

Chat later.. Relax.. Have a nice cup of tea.. Boo x

Thank you boo ?

Glass of vino instead of a cup of tea tonight. I actually don’t have to get out of bed super early tomorrow 

In my world of work, I get the chance to help people through difficult times every day. I wish I could do more of that on here.  It is really hard to see people suffer and feel so distant from the solution. I am rooting for you all x

Rule number 1, don’t try and have a deep and meaningful conversation with your nearest and dearest after a couple of drinks. Tried to talk to my hubby about his time away and somehow “I will really miss you” turned into “will you miss me more than gambling”. Of course I will you daft devil! I know you will read this as I have sent it to you so there you go.

I am really sorry that I cannot promise that I will not gamble while you are away. How many times have I said things like that before and they have been empty words? I mean it when I say that I have no intention to gamble and that I/we will put everything possible in place to make sure I don’t. That is as far as I can go.  You are my world, enough said.

Morning, it is another wild, wet, windy morning out there. I have my voice back this morning thankfully. I am not heading to work until a little today so having a leisurely cup of tea in bed. 

Diary, I don’t have a great deal to update on today. Unlike the weather, it has been quite a settled one. Worked from home fairly productively and made some more arrangements in prep for my husband going away next week. 

My weekend is planned. The weather is meant to be cold and dry so one day I am going to have some time alone with my camera, travelling the county for the ultimate autumn shots.  It will test how well I can get on with myself. My counsellor suggested that I might like to give purpose to my photography trip and take pictures that can be used by a local charity that I volunteer for. Fantastic idea. Purpose is important to me. 

Just a normal day really which feels good. 

What a cool post Murlo.

Your reinforcing some of my thoughts.

Thanks

Morning to all. I was up bright and early to catch a train. It seems the train isn't feeling as fresh as I am.  It is currently broken down in the middle of nowhere. Time to relax and listen to some music I think. 

Dear Diary.

I arrived at work a little late this morning because my train broke down. I don’t like being late for anything at any time and it would happen on a day when I had something that was really, really important to me to get right. On reflection, I think I did still manage to get it right.  I wondered on the way home what my old gambling self would have been like in the same circumstance. I am trying to think every day about something that I have done, thought or felt and consider the differences in me then and now. It helps me start focussed on my recovery.

I haven’t thought much more about my home alone time and perhaps that is a good sign. There is more planning to do but that can be for another day.  I have three more days to sort it.

Tomorrow evening my hubby is heading out on his work’s Christmas do so I am cooking for a couple of friends at our place. I am really looking forward to that. It pleases me to think that I want their company. The old me would have preferred the alone time for gambling.

Nothing else to say about today really, another normal one, no bad choices made.

I methodically unsubscribed from all of the gambling promos/emails a couple of weeks ago so I am annoyed to find my inbox full of Black Friday gambling deals. How the heck does that happen?

Its the trap Murlo.

Let the weather pi....ss you off, not some random sites

You are right Revenant. Trashed them all and emptied the trash. Done, gone, forgotten. The weather can do what it likes today, as long as it is good for my weekend outing with the camera. Looking promising..

Cool,

Worthy of the trash !

As with the weather and camera, will talk to Kim Jong-un and ask for camera weather 

None the less, agreed whether he interferes or not, it is looking promising 

Hello diary. 

Today has been a good day for me. Sparing a thought for all of those caught up in the events in London today and the emergency services that have responded  

Worked from home today which is a nice respite on a Friday. I think this is the first day since I have returned to work where I was genuinely glad of my own company and to work from home. I think that is progress. 

I have a couple of friends joining me at home this evening and hubby is out. Looking forward to cooking for them and  an entertaining evening. One knows about my gambling addiction and the other doesn’t. At some point I will tell my other friend but not for tonight. I trust them both equally. Tonight is time  for an evening of r and r and good company. 

I had a sneaky short outing with my camera today. The weather has been beautiful here. Dry, crisp and not a breath of wind.  So today I learnt that I am beginning to notice these things again. 

I think that is it for today. This weekend I will mark 4 weeks gamble free. 

Enjoy and well done x

Boo x