Abstain and maintain.Stepping forward never back.

Great post, Duncs - you have encapsulated perfectly the mindset of a compulsive gambler.

You are an inspiration to many. Thank you.

Joanna

Hey Duncs,

As always huge inspiration to me and all of us here. Thank you once again for the strength and belief u never stop giving, be proud my friend, ur not only marching onwards confident steps yourself, but showing the way to all of us.

I hope ur bus journey didn't take too long and u reached ur destination safe and didn't miss ur stop 😉

Keep on keeping on Duncs, stepping forward never back!!

Once again warmest wishes to yhe most important people in your life this lovely Sunday

Take care and b proud

Day at a time

Sandra x

Evening diary

Thanks Sandra and Joanna for your kind words, I am really humbled.

Yes sandra there are two special Mums in my life my own mother and of course my wife, the best mum any child could want, she is understanding, forgiving,kind and fun to be with, oh and I believe the word is Yummy!!

Today I worked for twelve straight hours,not a minutes break, just honest graft, tomorrow I am back before 6am so tonight I simply want to pay testament to those Mums out there who are by and large the innocent victims of this terrible addiction, they suffer greatly at the hands of gambling,often without waging a penny.

My message to you is simple.

Keep believing, remember the good times, abstinence will bring you many more rewards than any punt your son or daughter will wage.

They say blood is thicker than water and that you can't pick your family, both very true.

The only real way I learnt was through tough love, to learn my own mum is not a bank, but a decent human being who does not deserve the destruction gambling brings, just someone who deserves a life of her own choosing.

Abstinence stops creating sh##it in her life, a gift that is priceless,truly you can't put a value upon it.

So to one and all, our mothers are something else to consider about what our actions would wage upon their life.

Gambling is a very selfish act, abstinence is too, but one with constant and most profound effect on those folk we profess to hold dear.

Today I salute all the Mothers and the unconditional love they gift.

My name is Duncan i am a compulsive gambler No bet today

Stepping forward never back.

Morning diary.

On the bus to work, it is like a scene from a horror movie as there is thick fog, cant see past the end of my face lol. So i thought cycling would not be an activity for me, especially as i left my glasses at work yesterday! So today is april fools day, a wry smile comes across my face at the thought of what a fool i was for twenty years, twenty years kidding myself that gambling was something which would enhance and enrich my life, well today i know i am fully on board to the fact gambling is a total waste of time. Today i maintain that thought, that way the joke is no longer on me.

So yesterday i finished early, well started early and got home and cooked up our sunday roast a day late, brilliant because all the vegetables were reduced, as was the chicken. The fact was the most expensive thing on the table was the stuffing! Lol, and there is cauli cheese left for tonight! I do feel so much better when i eat well, in mind and body, when i gambled i really did not look after myself in that regard, ate sh#it, felt like sh#it looked like it too, just fueled my body on rubbish, the benefits are great, i have without doubt lost weight, my shorts are too big again lol, so another gift of recovery. The list goes on! Right nearly at my stop. Football tonight to look forward to and a hard graft inbetween.

No gambling for this old fool today. Duncs stepping forward never back.

i just gambled all my money away stole off my mother and wife today all of it....

APRIL FOOLS no i didn't but it's not actually a joke it was a reality some years ago. I will as you say never put them through that again they have there own life and i won't hinder it or make is worse for them with my terrible gambling. Keep Strong Duncs looking forward to your next post.

CasinoRoyaLoser

evening Diary

Had a great day today, another day's graft and from it I have scored more long term work on a decent rate, proves to me that putting it in rewards me,long may it continue.

Went food shopping after work with Sarah, no scrimping but equally no wasting the hard earnt, i guess just doing what folk who lead a normal undestructive life do, but for me it is a thing of beauty, to be able to get to the till not worrying about how much or worse thinking 'right Duncs you need to win that back!!'

gambling promoted great stress, it's waves never ceasing to batter long after each loss, my mindset always was thinking you can get something for nothing.

today I value my efforts, grabbed a couple more super cheap chickens, butchered them and made tandori for supper Delicious

Another supper for less than two quid a head.

So the freezer is full, the cupboards too.

Watching the football out of one eye and topping my resolve to keep making the right choice with the other.

Another reward for my efforts.

Abstinence is the gift that really does never cease in gifting.

I take it both handed.

My name is Duncs No bet today

Stepping forward never back

supper sounds delicious

well done on the continuing abstinence

triangle

Lovely positive post from you Duncs. The food on the table must of felt great and tasted delicious. This is the first post i have read today and it's put me in a positive mood already. I won't be gambling today.

CasinoRoyaLoser

Hi Duncan

Nice post from you last night, i have said it before but it is ART to be able to write like you do. Have a great day, Dark Place

Afternoon Diary

Thanks for the kind words folks, dp my friend I just write from the heart, I am so elated by what my life holds I want to cherish every moment.

To be able to wake up next to my wife is a reward bigger than any punt ever gave, to watch a great game of football with my boys equaling in it's delivery of happiness along with the unconditional love my Hounds give and our Lily learning to drive, to be able to contribute to the lessons all just little gifts life gives me, yes folk might say they are just normal things, nothing to get excited about.

Believe me I wake up excited every morning!! lol 21 years my Sarah has been there by my side, I just wore the wrong mindset for 19 of them, always thinking I could gift them all more, and for no effort and for free.

Oh the fool I was, gambling is a selfish act, nothing more or less, throw into the pot the fact that the compulsion to throw all I had at it and more and the results were plain to see, a very distorted view of life, a walking talking bile factory, that is what my addiction made me, I let it, too ready to gift it all I had, for what??

A buzz!! the feeling of self importance !!

What an ar##se !!!!

So today a big boss, threw a spanner in the works because the wrong product was mistakenly used, he threw his toys out the pram, instigated grief and arguments in my mind just for his own pleasure, me I stood tall, pointed out that actually the mistake was from an external supply source and they would be accountable, oh he had the bit between his teeth, just seemed to want to bully anyone he could.Me I stood thinking what an ar##se you are, I have walked in those shoes, no more and I have your measure!!

I calmly went about rectifying the issue, job done, and the outcome four days more graft paid for everyone, the big boss, what did he lose??

Today face, maybe he has issues he should deal with himself rather than take it out on innocent folk, hard working folk at that.

I detest bullies, I cant understand folk who don't find out the facts and make uneducated decisions, the glass in my life is half full, it is that way because I topped it up, I do so every day, nobody was injured, just inconvienience caused, deal with it and move on.

A senior member of the crew shook my hand at the conclusion of the shift, he said you have 'balls'

Me I smiled and said no I have a life.

That is all made possible because I took my own head from out of the clouds, I want life and to live it, that is possible if I Abstain and maintain

That is there on offer for each and every one of us.

I f****d up enough of my life to never want to add to it, and certainly not to others to boot.

My name is Duncs I am a compulsive gambler No bet today stepping forward never back

More football to relish tonight and graft and darts tomorrow!! happy days

Cheers for post mate.well done for standing tall.bullies are getting away with things to easy,i have a few in my work who are close to getting brought down a peg or two.i wont be gambling to win debt back just really gutted I have got it this state.its the worse in 17 years I have even been and I have 2nd baby on the way.:-( keep asking myself why why why.deep down I know the answer,because I have been a total selfish [email protected] to stand up and be husband and father I should be.

Scottyboy is not betting today for a better tomorrow.

Hi Duncs.

Thanks for your posts on my diary recently. They've helped me immensely. I really like your outlook on life and I need to learn to adopt a similar sort of attitude. I'm going to try hard and work at it.

All the best.

Thanks for your posts and support duncs,you have helped me get through an extremley difficult period.

Appreciating the small things in life is what it is all about,I woke up this morning and thought of your post

My partner is asleep beside me,my two littlens still have a comfortable warm home,bills are paid,food in the cupbaords,holiday to look forward to,dunno why I yearn for more.

Thanks for putting back on the straight and narrow,all the best.

Morning diary.

Had a lay in today, up at 6 lol. Enjoyed the morning glory. Walked the hounds and knocked up the lunches, five triple decker club sandwich to create lunch time envy when the five of us tear them open. Lol. On the bus to work late start hopefully early finish, darts and dirty burgers the plan for tonight. Bring it on!

Right heres my stop.

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Duncs thanks for the post in my diary. You are spot on with your post, So i read it twice and told myself don't you dare ruin it again. It's posts like that i come here for as it helps me to no end to read that others are going through this ordeal and i'm not alone. I wrote a more positive post because of yours and others so i really wish i could buy you a beer for that. 3 pounds for a beer is better than 2k for 20 mins of s**t pleasure lol.

CL