Day 1 today after yet another severe relapse that left shaking anxious crying suicidal depressed and broke . It’s a miracle I didn’t off myself last night . So I went to Edmonton for haloween than instead of enjoying haloween I went gambling and lost money I couldn’t afford to lose than the uber  back to my hotel crying shaking got back To my hotel packed my things and walked to the bus station to catch my bus back to Calgary I waited there for almost two hours crying shaking couldn’t stand being in my body got back to Calgary than today crying all day on and off . I can’t handle this pain anymore it’d been non stop every week i relapse it’s too much to handle . Gambling turned me into a zombie I’m just a shell of a person . Starting over my life today .Â
Dear Peter,Â
I'm sorry to hear you're in such a low place at the moment, it sounds like you're going through a really tough time but please know there is always a way forward, you can get through this.Â
If you are feeling unable to keep yourself safe at the moment, do reach out to 999 for immediate support. There are also other crisis support services you can speak to including the Samaritans.Â
You can reach out to our helpline on 0808 8020 133 or our live chat on the website to speak to an advisor and make sure you have all of the support you need through this too.
Please don't be alone with this.
Sophie
Forum Admin
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