DAY 1 - sorry not an original tag!!

Day 20 - still gamble free abstaining one day at a time, ignoring urges and dealing with the triggers OK.

Missed Day 19 - but was very busy trying to keep off the lap top all day and evening as Mondays are a usual trigger day, and again, home alone all day, so didn't post!

Day 20 is a work day so just doing this before the England game. Have to play for pride today lads!!

Soon be Day 21 tomorrow which is 3 weeks! Luckily, having been through recovery twice now I remember what its like and how to keep busy, how to deal with urges & triggers so that it isn't such a problem as it was ~ especially first time around!

So, break the triangle; keep busy and don't give in to temptations. Be strong and face forward remembering what you have lost and what you now have to lose! If in doubt, come on here and read others posts!!

That's my coping strategy basically!

Hope all'is well with everyone else and that they can and are coping OK too! Cheers, Cliff

Hi wolf

20 days is good and your thinking is very positive keep going and staying strong you are doing well

Suzanne x

Well - Day 22 and still Gamble Free.

Thanks for the support Suzanne ~ much appreciated and hope your journey is getting easier as the days go by.

Day 21 yesterday which went by so fast I didn't realise I had forgotten to post on here and register a 3 week milestone until I was already in bed!

Discussed with the OH yesterday and sorted out a repayment programme to replace the household accounts what I owe from my last relapse. Its doable but means I will have no spare cash each month to do anything for me ~ which I suppose is just my own fault for spending money I didn't have in the first place. It will take 7 months but that will mean personal debt free by next January! oh well, will not have any reason to gamble or means, as every time I get an urge I'll just have to look at my bank balance to know I couldn't even if I had the ability to go on-line!

Any way - best foot still going forward marching into the gamble free future, abstaining by choice. Keep marching on all and if you feel the urge, just read some of the posts in others diaries and newcomer posts to see the damage this disease can cause! Cliff

Hi Wolf

Thanks for your support yesterday

Your posts are getting stronger by the day

Keep going you are doing so well

Suzanne x

Hi Diary & readers ~ Day 23 today and still Gamble Free.

A mixed day that in that for the first time in 3 weeks, i missed going on-line and playing a few slots! So just read a book instead! Lost a day to myself, but didn't lose any money! But I know the feelings; that i would have gambled on a day like today just to get through it and lose it; These become much less frequent as time goes on and I fill the voids with other non gambling deeds, it was just a bit of a shock because this was the first time on this journey and i had forgotten these sorts of days would exist, lurking in the shadows!!

So, that's all for today - feel shattered but also a bit proud i didn't gamble today! Hope every one else is battling well with their demons and realising they can be dealt with!

Have good gamble free weekend all, Cliff

Hey Cliff

Well done on passing the 3 week mark!! Superb going soldier. Don't be down about having urges, be proud about not giving in to them - these tests will come and go. I've found reading and writing great mechanisms for blocking the urges out......and this forum is brilliant for that!!

Have a great holiday!!

Mr B

Day 25 ~ gamble free through choice of abstaining, one day at a time; sometimes more than once in a day as an urge comes along so the days are broken up in between the normal 24 hour cycle!

been very busy weekend with a friends 30th birthday yesterday and the OH's mothers 80th Birthday celebrations today! To say exhaustive since Friday would be an understatement but has kept us busy and takes our mind off the gambling. And the longer that can continue the better. Being away for most of next week will also take a side out of the triangle, so looking forward to that and actually will enjoy a holiday for a change, rather than missing the opportunities to gamble at home! Anyways all ~ good luck on your own path chosen to stop gambling. Everyone's is different ~ but all for the same reason. I will not gamble today as I don't want to lose and can't win is a good motto! I win because I don't gamble is also another one I like! Safe journeys all and will check in when we return next weekend. Cliff

Day 33 today 🙂 still gamble free and abstaining one day at a time by choice, facing forward to a gamble free future!

It isn't getting any easier but not getting any harder ~ so sort of a stalemate at times! I still have urges to go online and waste money ever hopeful of hitting a big win; but refrain and remind myself of the countless number of times I haven't managed anything but adding to the debt mountain!

So staying strong and maintaining the zero tolerance to gambling i have placed upon myself! Hope all are coping with their own demons and challenges ~ stay strong and be safe. KR's Cliff

Hi wolf

Well done on 33 days will be 34 today lol

I know what you mean not getting easier but not harder either

We are not adding to out debt we are reducing it

So we are winning everyday by choosing not to play

Keep strong and keep positive and keep making the right choice

Suzanne x

Hi all ~ Day 41 today, which is a shame as wanted it to be day 40 as that was a nice round figure and a good target to reach but sadly now passed! But hey, 41 is a good number too, and that equates to just one day under 6 weeks!! So Day 42 tomorrow, which will be 6 weeks ~ wow!!

Thanks everyone for your support and apologies for being tardy in posting, but managed the first month virtually posting each day, but a family holiday got in the way of completing that first month on a daily basis and since I returned, been a bit of a mad house here, keeping very busy and away from temptation!

Still having urges though and expect I always will, but as I've just explained on the 2014 Challenge, having kicked all main gambling vices 6 odd years ago, my recent relapses were on one particular online bingo site [just the one] and a particular bingo game and an on-line poker slot game, and as I have given myself a life ban to the site and self excluded, I can't ever play them ~ but that doesn't stop me wanting to, and I suppose I always will from time to time!!

But hey ~ still gamble free by choice, abstaining one day at a time marching toward a gamble free future and a better bank balance.

Keep strong also everyone, thanks for reading and will check in again soon.

Kind regards, Cliff

Hi wolf

Thanks for your supportive words on my thread

Your post comes across very positive and strong a big well done to you on your continuing days

I am finding now any negative urges are soon booted out cos I think of the positives and I use the triangle every day

But you are choosing not to gamble each day and now you have reached 6 whole weeks

Keep making that right choice Cliff and your bank balance will get better daily as mine does

Suzanne x

Hi all - Day 63 reached today!! Quick selfie pat on my back as I am so pleased to make 9 weeks, pass two pay days and deal with the stresses of losing agood friend to cancer, a holiday with the OH & mother in law; the OH being quite ill and poorly plus a cr** state of play at work which is very stressful!!

Many of these life moments would have been instant triggers to log on and gamble to escape the real world!

However, i have not done so despite some strong thoughts & pulls ~ I have found other ways to lose myself from reading real proper books [still cant get a Kindle :~ where's the browsing to read a dust jacket and select a solid book to read in the Kindle cloud, just not the same] to cleaning the house [a lot, much the amusement and sometimes distress of the OH!]!

So, another personal milestone reached ~ the next one will be for me......94 days / 12 weeks!! I know most look to reaching nice round figures like 50 or 100 but I like these other oddish numbers personally!!

So - keep going strong everyone, take one day at a time, sort out the finances, self exclude & abstain and find other things to do to take keep urges at bay and deal with any triggers! Also, biggest advice I can give new members is to not go it alone! Get some help from partners, family, friends or if that isn't possible, from all the people on this site!

I know its easily said than done ~ but it can be done!

Cliff.x

Hi wolf

63 days you definitely deserve a selfie pat on the back and I am sending you one too

Keep going stay strong and positive going towards a happier life

Suzanne x