Today I move on with my life, I am 26 years old with a Great future ahead of me but that's my biggest worry in life and what made me lose all my savings last Saturday. I am a hard working lad, my routine is gym every morning before work, work hard, come home and help with the housework and relax with my partner. It can get very monotonous at times and the money I've been saving is for a mortgage next year as we are currently renting. I'd not had a bet since I lost 1500 back in feb chasing losses. The pain it caused me made me stop. I managed to move on with my life but now I'm back to square one, but this time in debt of 2,000 to my brother. I used my savings last sat as a stake on a game of football for a team in good form to win. In my head I was thinking how me and my partner could spend the winnings (she didn't know) on shopping, a break etc. Because of how routine our life had become and we never treat ourselves because of putting every penny away for a house deposit next year. The game finished 0-0 and I lost. The feeling was awful! I've only just stopped feeling sick every day for a whole week, I was lost, depressed all week. No gym, no motivation, no concentration at work. The only person I could tell was my brother, he's given me the opportunity now to pay 120 a month over 17 months to clear the debt and has put the money back in my account. My family never knew I gambled, why I know I need to stop forever and never look back. It used to be a bit of fun, small bets on the football now it's waiting months to save money and gambling at high stakes ! I must admit I'm finding it very hard to get back into a routine. I keep feeling guilty and I'm now on debt that won't go away unless I work hard to pay it off !! I had a good life with money in the bank but I wanted more ! (Greed) what's wrong with me ?? Why did I have to gamble my years savings in order to spend extra cash ? Why couldn't I take 300 out of it and spend it on shopping ? Why did I have to bet in order to spend ? I have to move on with my life, get back into routine and pay my brother off as quickly as I can and move on.. Thanks for reading, sorry if it's all a bit of a mess put together, I need help and need advice on how to treat myself & save for a rainy day and NOT gamble!
Al,
Whenever you have an urge, refer back to the post you have just written and the emotions will come rushing back and hopefully kill the urge.
You're extremely lucky to have the support of your brother. Have you thought about coming clean to your partner - perhaps making her aware will at as an emotional motivation to quit as well. Of course, this is entirely up to you and that advice comes from somebody who has always kept the extent of their gambling a secret themselves so I can fully understand your reasons.
For the last year or two in particular, I've found that I will look at a pair of shoes or something which I really want, and think I want that...but I don't want to spend the money. So I would head to the bookies in the hope of winning the money. I would then perhaps lose the exact amount that the shoes were (say 50 as an example) and even if I was to win the 50, I would think to myself I'm doing well here, why stop!? And I'd end up losing the 50 I'd won and perhaps more.
The reason I've mentioned that is because it sounds like you might be similar in the way you mentioned your recent loss. My intention from here on in is to treat myself to something for every 2 weeks that I manage without a bet. Perhaps after 2 months, I might up this to a 1 month target. But it's a way of working towards something, so perhaps you might think it's a good idea for yourself too.
Anyway, you're not alone and I'll be returning to your diary to check up on how you're getting on 🙂
Good luck, you're doing great.
Day 8.
Thanks for your reply. The mention about buying the shoes helped and did relate to what I'm like when it comes to gambling. I will learn to treat myself every 2-4 weeks to help make me feel better and have things to show for my hard work.
Today I have to meet up with friends later down the pub and I'm finding it very hard in my head to socialise after what happened last Saturday when I lost a lot of money. The closer it gets to the time the more I'm dreading it. I really enjoy the company with my friends so why am I finding it hard today to meet them ? It's like I just want to lock myself in the house. Why I'm still finding it hard to go to the gym and get back to my same routine.
Can you help me with geting back in the gym and meeting people to socialise again, I'm finding it so hard. I'm still feeling sorry for myself after what I've done.
Very similar situation to myself, instead of just buying a new pair of jeans for 80 quid I used to try and win them. Sometimes losing 500 because of it, then I would begrudge paying 30 quid for something else. Just totally illogical way of thinking.
Do your best to just write of the debt, so what it's done, it's gone, if you'd have won you probably would've done another bet anyway? I know I would've.
Get back to the gym get your head clear and enjoy some quality time with your partner you'll soon have your brother paid off. Good luck
Day 10.
Thanks for all your help and support. I have taken onboard a lot of that you have said about buying items and not gambling for them. I will definitely be treating myself a lot more and feeling happy that I've spent the money on something I want with money I've earned from working and not from a bet.
I managed to get to the gym yesterday morning, it was hard work as I've not been for over a week now, but it felt good to be able to say I've got back into my routine. I am now looking forward to payday this Friday and sorting out my finances and hopefully start paying my debt back to my brother. It will hurt me each month, but it's a reminder of my stupidity and why not to gamble. Your always going to lose. You can't beat the bookie.
I am feeling more positive each day, however I still get the thoughts when I'm on my own thinking of how my next days would have felt if I didn't bet my savings away. Still have the guilt I suppose, but I just have to keep my head up and get on with it, the money isn't coming back.
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