...

Sandra,,

For your own sake and recovery you must not read my diary..I'm sorry but I'm not in a good place and Xmas is a particularly difficult time for me .

I need an outlet for anger as I can't do it in my 3d life as I have too much responsibility .

I don't want to be responsible for you being unhappy...you must stick with the people on here ....Julie, Mr B ..etc and keep strong.

I can't guarantee that I won't say hurtful things in general right now and you being a good person will get caught up in the cross fire.

I will discharge anything I need to on the f and f side but just keep safe lovely ...you are a good person. Nothing I say is aimed at you or anyone I post to but my life was ruined by a CG and even though I try to separate all that out, some days I cannot do it and have slips of my own very publicly .

Tactless comments by newbies can rev me up so Im not going to read those either along with controlled gambling posts as they also trigger me into rage. I react venomously to those tactless posts and that's my fault because I should know better at my age.

Keep safe ..I'm beyond Hope Sandra and my path is different to yours...for me now is damage limitation and acceptance of what will not be ....in your life you have much to live for at 28 and the world to see...

You remind me very much of my younger self which I feel hugely protective of and your support for me has been immense..and given me much laughter with your zany personality through some tough days ...

((((S ))))...keep eating those 12 dishes :-))))

Thank you both so much,

Sometimes i just need to kickstart my life again.

Good days and bad days, accept it all

Have a lovely Xmas all

S x

Have a good Christmas Sandra!! Thanks for all your support on my diary. Hopefully, I can contribute a little to your diary going into the New Year. Have a good time over the next few days!!

Thank you Martin, Merry Xmas to you, enjoy!!!!

Dear diary,

Phew....coming out the other end. d**n, what a morning today. Did cry myself to sleep, but at least passed out and finally slept without waking up for 5 hrs!!bliss...

Went for a good run, lots of energy to give away, feel better, getting my natural colour back on my face and raising back to life.

Going round sis soon, make it quick and come back for more sleeps before tomorrow

Take care all, have a calm and peaceful Xmas Eve

S xxx

Hi Sandra, thanks for posting on my diary. Merry Christmas 🙂

Thank you x

Dear diary,

Back home and ready for sleeps 🙂 had very peaceful time round sis, bearing in mind i have stuffed myself with all the ( healthy ) food...just sat down with my little boy and had a honest chat about school life and all, so much joy and laugh in him it warms my heart... Bless him, i should see him more often..

Then we had the main part of the tradition lol ( including poppies and milk ) and...actually for some reason only me and little one had it...hmm..might clear it with sis tomorrow lol.. and next thing we both glued to tv screen watching " Snowman and a dog "...fantastic, never seen it before . We agreed to wait for Santa tonight lol...i hope he is still up 😉

All good, feel so tired so hopefully get at least 8 hours sleep tonight...i know what to do next time i struggle with insomnia heh heh...

Have a good rest all, few more hours and we are there...all of us made it, be proud!!! 🙂

Sandra x

P.s.a little note to mr B. I looked back at ur post and must of skipped few words this morning. I found a lot of friends and support here, and i am thankful to each and every one of dear soldiers on this site. I didn't get out of my comfort zone at all the other night, the person i think you have in mind is trully God send and has the biggest respect from me. The help and support from the person in my journey was immense and i can trully say, support can come from the directions you can least expect 🙂 sorry if it come across this way for you, but it was a honest question/answer/thought from my heart. And the person knows what i ment to say 🙂

You doing the right thing by sticking close by Mr B, belief and strentgh to you..well done on the journey so far and i shall be there for you on good and bad days 🙂

Ramble...sorry, suppose to be short note....ok..time for sleeps...

If not...guess who is gonna be first to wish you all Merry Xmas in the morning ? 😀

Night all xx

P.s.No gambling - no intention - no desire to ruin my life any further..time to start digging up harder than before !!

Hey S

Ok, so maybe I got that wrong........but the rest of the post I absolutely got right.......and you've just demonstrated it all over. I can see why that person could have been and still will be a great support - in the same way as I know you could be and will be an immense support for her - you are both good eggs on different journeys......but bizarrely with the same destination......primarily peace and happiness.

Happy Christmas Mrs.........your post was full of positivity - what a difference a day makes......but one day at a time eh?

Night night and sleep well,

Mr Brightside xx

Thank you mr B and Julie 🙂

Merry Xmas all.

With lots of joy comes memories and sadness and regrets.but lets make this day special to the ones we care about. We all aknowledge our ups and downs here, we are on the right direction. Just for today rise that honest smiles to each other.

Peace and happiness to you all no matter where you are !!

Love

Sandra

Hey girl just poping in to wish ya a merry Christmas. Toasting ya with a mikes hard rock cranberry lemonade about now and and pretty tasty stuff I might add. LOL gonna POP that Christmas ham in the oven pretty quick and hopefully I don't pass out before It's done. LOL Lol Lol wishing ya all that magic that Christmas brings. Cheers.

Hi Sandra,

Here's hoping you had a nice Christmas day today, as you express in your post today should be a day for enjoying and appreciating the steps forward that we're all making. It isn't always easy, but each day without gambling is always the right choice.

Hope you didn't think of work once!

Ryan

Thank you all

Better edit this one lol...

ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE - that was my original message 😉

X

Thank you kind lady and much peace and happiness to you, it is out there for you to grab.

xxx

Thanx soldiers xx

Diary,

Very dissapointed in myself today. Had one too many last night. Looks like pj day today lol....and never drink again!!

Have a lovely Boxing day all

Day at a time

No gambling

S x

Sandra

my friend maybe you could take on the old english tradition

Hair of the dog lol!!

glad to read you had a day which had some good memories in it.

Because my friend you are worth it.

Duncs stepping forward never back.