HARMONY !

Hey my one and only bezzie,

Do you think I am losing it? I hear the whispers.

Love is like a butterfly, hold it too tight it will get crushed. Hold it too loose and it will fly.

Night night treacle.

A.N. xxx

Yo,

You know that feeling , when you really really do not want to go to work.

When you sit there almost convincing yourself that you must have an ailment . When you need to gather ever ounce of motivation you have to get on and get going .

Well that's how I feel today ,

I know it's only 5 days untill I am off, but sometimes your days off feel like they go in fast forward and you feel like you've had none at all .

I do not think that I have needed this break which starts a week on Sunday so much in my life . I am cream crackered , Mr Flagg will be shaking his head at me , pull yourself together women , find the positives , but today I struggling .

Anyways best put my best foot forward , shake a leg and bloody well get on with it . Sitting here thinking I really can not be arsed is achieving nothing . Cause at the end of the day , I will go to work , will give it my all , and once you get there is ain't so bad .

Just hope the next 10 hours go as quickly as one of my days off seemed to .

Smile on my face , I march out the door , to see what dilemmas work brings me today . ( to be honest I know as I had 3 calls yesterday , good knows how they will cope whist I an away , but you know what it their problem not mine)

Day one of five ,

Shiny xxxxxxx

Russell Grant just phoned me to letme know that the stars say you're going tone ok today (he phoned you three times yesterday but each time you were engaged). He explained to me that once you're up and about and back in the groove it'll be plain sailing, something to do with Venus he asserted. He mumbled that once you get to midday it's all down hill and you'll be overcome with a wave of joyful relief, something to do with Mars leaving your sphere of influence he drawled. Overall he claimed that you should be proud of your achievements and claimed the middle of the road is widening, something to do with Saturn in alignment with Jupiter.

A lovely conversation, I feel relieved now and I want to pass this onto you, so don't worry. A lovely man too, Russell, all that knowledge and it only cost me £300 plus expenses, he's so thoughtful lousy dancer though apparently.

Take care

Steve

Good Morning,

I am going to throw some positive feelings your way to see you through the day. I have woken up this morning ready to take on the world. I feel great and hope some of this will rub off on you.

Five days will fly by and soon enough you will be enjoying a happy, relaxing time.

I read your post yesterday and for the rest of the night I couldn't stop thinking about how much I would love a lamb stew. Come Sunday tea time the smell of lamb stew will be drifting out of my kitchen window that is a fact.

I hope your day is full of suprise and laughter.

Tomso.

hey Shiny....

No harm in going into cruise control in your job for a week before your jols....cos by doing that your still delivering over 100% ...

What ever happens in work you wil l duly swat away with that fly swatter...

Start packing!

R and D xx

Morning Shiny,

Missed that 500th, was sleeping like a baby.

Never mind, I will try and grab your 1000th!

Ain't that just the case(pun), days off fly by work days drag like hell when you're looking forward to something.

Anyway although you weren't there I read your tarot(with Shiny nametag instead) last night. I came up with The Chariot upright. It's meaning is Triumph over adversity, overcoming lifes obstacles, decisiveness and ambition in achieving your goals, a well deserved victory. Working within the boundaries of one's life to build up a successful existence. Self control, effort and perseverance are the key words.

Mine was The high priestess standing for intuition, wisdom and secret knowledge. Showing the female side of the male personality. Something is yet to come but patience must be adhered to. New solutions for difficulties in home and work life will arrive. The influence of women and key words duality and mystery.

Hope you like it. I enjoyed it. Belief and faith are sometimes the things we are most likely to forget. Although my god is not the cards, it's important that we have something to hold on to. (Longer post! lol)

Take care dearest. Soon be on your hols.

A.N. xxx

Shiny.

Firstly my Sarah passed on her thanks for the opportunity to read your diary this week and how in the process of recovery it helps alot,so thanks from me too as every brick piled up one atop the other means the defences are looking good no great.

so your holiday approaches, something I know you will enjoy, are you gamcare holidaying?? as you have not mentioned it either way, was just thinking if you are make sure you leave us all instructions and plenty of post-its lol. Joking aside it really is great to read that you put yourself ontop of your list!! Recovery has I feel taught me that if my self esteem and sense of being are a thing i like to see in that mirror I look in of a morning then chances are the day will at worst be just right.

I hope the same for you my shiny friend( of whom I confess is still known as the dusty fairy in my house)

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Yo,

Quick dip into my diary , hoping no one knocks on my door for half hour .

Quite a mystic meg feel to it today lol

So thank You guys for polishing up your balls and taking the time out to predict my future .

One thing really struck a cord with me ,

Working within the boundaries of one's life to build up a successful existence.

It is something I always struggle with , the circumstances of my life have at times caused me to be very resentfull, this is not good resentment for me has always led a path to the closest bookies .

Slowly I am exceptiing my life , no longer dreaming of a different one , no longer blaming this that or the other for it being as it is , yep I supposed I am a bit trapped , but I think most of us are . There comes a time when for me anyway accept it , work within in it , to make it the best it can be .

So suppose the cards were right then .

Gotta go know , want to post on a few diaries before my meeting at 3 ....

Catch you laters

Shiny xxxxxx

hey Shiny im just popping in to say hi and hope your all good take it easy sunshine : ) X

Morning,

Read your post yesterday and saw I got a little mention 🙂 actually Mr Flagg was fine with what you wrote. I guess just by mentioning positive you were aware that you had a slight gloomy outlook. I think awareness is equally "positive" without it that gloom could have lasted far longer than it did. However, I read your later post and felt you had picked up somewhat. Sometimes you don't need to find the positives they will eventually find you. When you spend a period of time in our middle they will come quicker than even we expect.

Does that make sense? Probably not 🙂

Wishing you a lovely weekend my friend counting down to HOLIDAY!!

Flagg

Hi Shiny,

I wanted to thank you for your kind and caring posts on my diary. A friend in need... Thanks again friend. -joanxx

Mornin shiny

Just wanted to say enjoy the break , well all miss u but u deserve it so much , plenty of rest and no doubt deep thinkin , always remember the positive of how far u av come reflect on this year the positives so much out weigh the negatives

Most of all enjoy enjoy enjoy

A big hug on its way to u

Ps fortunately fp not a big fan of sstrictly ! Not sure she knows it exists , will gladly watch it with her though as long as she's happy

Take care

Castle2

Hi Shiny,

Your post made me smile : )

glad my mad ramblings made sense to someone 😉

Take care,

f x

Hi Shiny

Just wanted to say thanks for your posts and for helping me to put things into a little more perspective. I realise now that there are so many ups and downs on this journey and it’s not just about stopping gambling, but riding the subsequent storms, changing the way we think and ultimately finding that middle ground so that we stay stopped. Thank you for helping me reach that point 🙂

I am so happy to see you continue to move forward in your journey and that you are now starting to see the full benefits of doing so. I hope that you have a great break away, with all the peace and tranquillity that you so deserve... I am sure it will do you the world of good!

Thanks again,

Lmm xxx

Yo,

Thank you for your messages guys .

Holiday not quite there yet . Go one week today.

Before that 3 days at real job. Day off . Than 3 in the shop, as OH is going to take 3 days off .

Then Sunday , offt I go.

6 days of nothingness , quiet peace , no demands from no one , starting to really look forward to it .

In myself feeling ok, struggling bit with motivation with everything , but know its cause I am just worn out , and once I have this holiday the first in 2 years I will come back with my batteries full charged and feeling 100 % better than I do at the moment .

Anyways that's it from me today .

Shiny xxx