So here goes…
Decided to start a diary to keep myself accountable and positive, and also somewhere to vent.
Im H, new(ish) here, I actually joined GamCare a year ago but stupidly didn’t stop gambling. This time I’m going to really make it work.
A bit of background, I am 34 years old, been gambling since I was around 18. I am in a load of debt and stuck in a serious rut that I REALLY want to get out of. Gambling has consumed my life for too long now. It started in pubs on the bandits, then online slots, after banning myself from these I then moved to competitions sites. Instant wins etc. I spend so much of my time buying the tickets, checking the sites, looking at the tickets left. It literally consumes me.
I used to be sociable, go out, see friends, go to the gym. The past 2 years this has not happened. I have withdrew from everyone and everything. I get a day off from work and I barely get dressed. The stress and anxiety I have been suffering with is becoming too much.
As soon as payday hits, most of my money is gone, between bills and paying my debts. Then the little I do have left I gamble, then gamble more until I spend the whole month working as many extra shifts that I can and borrowing money where I can just to survive the month. Then repeat. I can’t do this anymore.
I know this isn’t going to be an easy journey, especially when I’m already starting with a negative balance for next month. But gambling isn’t the answer - I know this. So I’ll be doing everything I can to stay focused, get my life back. Remember who I was before this addiction took a hold of me.
So as I said… here goes 😊
That real person has always been there. It's a bit battered and bruised by addiction but it's now time to fight back
Hi mate,
I have a really similar gambling background to you and we are a similair age.
Best advice I can give you is get as much support as possible, use the free councilling and put every block possible in place.
You got this bro!
@g0r7tnm625 Hey Dom,
Thank you, hope you’re doing ok and sticking to it 🙂 good luck to you!
Thank you mate!
I have changed my lifestyle entirely, I dont get gambling urges at all and haven't for a while.
All about putting the work in, still get the councilling, still having open conversations with my support network.
You are one month away from being out of that dark cloud!
Hey!
I also relate to your post. Just had a terrible relapse after 3 months gf. Been battling near on 10 years in silence. Drained my paycheck and now I am panicking how I’m going to keep up the lie and get through the month.
You’re not alone. Try to get through one day at a time and nothing more.
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