Last Chance Saloon

Cheers mate, day 1 bagged & tagged

Day1: was a lot easier than expected, mainly because I was so angry with myself the last thing I wanted to do was go to the bookies. My wife helped a lot and encouraged me to stick with my plans and go out with a couple of mates for a meal. It felt good to do something normal. I often have to cancel my arrangements at the last minute through lack of funds or guilt from what I had lost leading up to the event, so to get back socialising was a massive boost and took my mind of things.

I have a week off work now so I can enjoy some time with my family without the pressures of work and the convenience of William Hills!

Day 3 - Went for tea with the family and relaxed today. Feel like a loads been lifted, although I do feel like the smallest thing is annoying me. Maybe i'm just on edge - or maybe people are genuinly annoying?? I have no plans to gamble and no access to money which is a good place to be. Just need to keep my mind occupied and keep focussed on leading the good life.

Evening Gyp68

Hope your doing well and enjoying your time off. First few days u get really annoyed and irritated I think most people think that happens to most people. Think it's an anxiety to bet as you've been doing it so long something in your day is going wrong.its a different routine but I'm only 2 weeks in and thankfully that passed quite quickly

Take care

Hi Craig, apologies for the late response. I'm on day 19 now and not getting as irritated which is good. I think the thing that helps most is not having access to money. I feel like a child half of the time taking just enough cash for my basics each day but this beats having my bank card - anything can happen if I do.

I hope things are still going well for you pal.

Hope you are staying strong, lack of access definitley helps. This time around im putting those blocks in myself, this evening is the first time since Thursday i have taken my wallet out by myself. Went to the gym trained and returned, felt on top of the world with the sun shining and no money lost and no bets placed. On to tomorrow.

Cheers for the posts fellas.

Day 44!! Not having access has been a massive help. I was tempted (or thought about it) when I had £20 cash on me on a work day, could have easily nipped into the bookies and blown that and been back to square one. Just to make sure I didn't I walked a different way to the station, called my mum for a catch up and felt great afterwards for winning the minor battle.

Had my haircut yesterday so took my wifes card for this reason only, she asked if I would be ok and I said yes (it did cross my mind that I may faulter again but I didn't). Could have easily called to the cash machine and fed the habbit but I want to win this thing more than I want to win a few quid (or more likely lose a few - and more importantly lose faith).

Feeling good but not taking anything for granted, we all know how easy it is to have a bad day. I don't plan on having one anytime soon.

All the best to you all - stay positive, there's always a choice no matter how hard it seems.

Day 81 and still going strong. Yesterday was difficult though as a group of us were planning to go to the races for fathers day, I was not going to bet, just go for the social aspect but i was worried something might be triggered in me that led to betting on the days following. I didn't want to doubt myself but this has been the reality in the past so was playing it safe.

In the end my wife wasn't feeling well so we cancelled and had a picnic instead so all is good. I defo didn't feel it would be a good idea - it would have been like torture so my no-betting streak continues.

Lost track of days and gambling creeped back in unfortunately...

The amount of times I have woke up positive thinking it was a new start then several hours later calling into the bookies... I lose count.

Today I really want that fresh start though. The problem I have now is that I took out a loan (way more than I needed) just to settle what i had taken from our savings and need to pay this back over 24 months. I have enough left to pay for 12 months partly because I used some of the loan to gamble (!).

I get a good wage but in a years time I need to face the latest twist in my life as a gambler and come clean to my wife if it can be kept secret that long.

I have switched my current account in hope that I can make this fresh start with bank statements that don't have dozens of on-line gambling transactions...

I need to keep my head up and get back on the forums to keep this fresh in my mind - that was my first mistake - thinking I could handle lifes pressures without support. Keep your fingers crossed for me as this is not the life I wanted.

V sorry, Gyp, I jumped down your throat there.

I don't ask keep asking him if he wants to gamble, partly because I'm trying let him fix him. Trying...My experience was that whilst I was also prepared to try to communicate and for us to spend time together, the boundaries can't move (otherwise we end up tolerating what we shouldn't) and the emotional proverbial needs to be correctly disposed of in order to effectively move on. A line in the sand is fine at that point but not before. But that's just how I see it this time round.

Wish you well,

CW

Thanks for the post on my diary Gyp.

How are you doing? If I were you I'd just talk to your wife, be honest. It helped get me to where I am today.

Thanks both.

Day 1 again today but I've made quite a lot of changes. New bank account so there's no reminders of my hopefully old spending patterns.

I won't say too much but I feel good/different.

CW, no need to apologise, I feel awful for everyone this affects. You have obviously been through a lot and it must be annoying when a gambler trys to defend themselves. I hate what it's made me but unfortunately for me I am good at covering up so others don't get hurt which only adds pressure to my life.

Brandon, good advice. This usually works, although I may have gone too far this time.

Keep going mate well done on the landmark!