Life begins again

Evening Diary

What a day but I have come through I won today I did not give in to temptation

I want to thank Everyone who sent me messages of support it reAlly helped me

I have been on here on and off all day sending messages too and if I have helped one person on here not to gamble today I will be happy

I have not gambled today and it's thanks to the gamcare forum and people that care

Day 23 done and dusted xx

Suzannexx

Hi

Just read your latest post and wondered if you smiled whilst typing. I did reading it.

If your honesty has helped one other person how good does that make you feel?

If your refusing to risk a penny has helped one person does it make you feel good?

I can read the sense of relief and pleasure in your post. It sounds like it's come from a real positive person.

Pat yourself on the back - take a look in the mirror at the person who did something good today. Take a look at the person who didn't lose a single penny and know that those here that support you & those around you that love you are smiling with you and admire your strength today.

Wouldn't it be bloody great if tomorrow was the same?

Xx shelly

Good. Morning Diary

Day 24 Feeling positive today after yesterday

Working all day so thoughts won't be there

Funny but I never think about it at work it's on the way home but I feel stronger today

One day at a time won't play today because I won't win today

Happy gambling free day all

Suzannex

Evening Diary

Today was a long day at work feel emotionally and physically drained and shattered off to bed soon so tired

Have not bet today won't bet today because I know the score

Hope everyone has a peaceful and bet free evening and I will be saying day 25 tomorrow morning

Suzanne xx

Great post Suzanne. Good to read you won't be wasting another penny today.

Don't waste a single penny tomorrow, make every day count x

Shelly

Good. Morning diary

Day 25 has arrived and I have not wasted a single penny on betting.

Short day at work today so that's good

I realise that with me I didnot have to be in a certain mood to bet I would do it in all moods happy annoyed down stressed tired it did not make a a Difference but the outcome was always the same I lost my money

My OH if fine at the moment he knows now I cannot even bet 1 penny because I would not stop

I do like this saying that Shellyb has posted on my diary

About not betting one penny

So I am going to say I will not gamble today even one penny and keep strong I got paid last Friday and have not spent any of it on gambling that feels good need to get through the whole month that will be some goal

As for now One day at a time and I wish everyone a happy free gambling day

I won't play today I don't want to

Take care

Suzanne xx

Hi Suzanne

Well done on the 25 days , it's great to see you making the most of this forum getting the support you need and also supporting many others on the way

That's something to be really proud about its good people like you that make this fantastic site work

Have a great day and best wishes with your recovery

Castle2

Not one penny wasted today makes it a good day.

You said that it's your journey home that gives you the urges.

Have you tried to change your routine home? Do you have a picture of a loved one, someone you love more than life itself? Could you put their photo in your sun visor or on the dash? In your purse or pocket if it's a bus ride?

Look at the picture and say ' not one penny'

Breaking the routine of when thoughts come is a good way around it, maybe listen to some toe tapping hip swinging real up beat music ( lol)

Anything is worth a try if it lets you keep that penny.

My wonderful late nan always told me. " you look after the pennies and the pounds will take care of themselves"

Wise words from a wise old owl x

Shelly

Evening diary

Not one penny spent on gambling today because I chose not to and it makes me feel good to be in control at the moment

I did not play today because I did not want to

Have a peaceful gambling free evening all

Suzanne xx

Good morning DiAry

Day 26 and it feels good today

Going down to Essex tonight after work to stay with son and his family til Monday

Other son that half living with me is driving me and his girlfriend down

It's 200 miles from where I now live so I don't see them as much as I would like to so am looking forward to it

I will take my I PAD and keep this site close to me.

OH is staying at home with the dog he loves having everyone here but does not like spending his well earned days off travelling

So he will be quite happy here

I won't gamble today because I don't want to and If I want to spend Any money it will be on my family

Which will make me feel good

Have a happy free gambling day all

One day at a time

Suzannexx

Hi Suzanne

Spending time with loved ones is important but more important with a clear head to be able to give them our full attention without thoughts of gambling been in the way

Good call with the I pad shows how focussed and clear frame of mind you are in

Have a great time

Castle2

Good afternoon Diary

Day 27 and not one penny spent on gambling

Am at sons having a barbs later this afternoon.

In the garden at the moment on my own they have gone shopping.

What a mixture of emotions I am experiencing since leaving my home feel absolutely ashamed they know but not saying anything but they have commented on my weight loss and they must be worried about me which makes me feel so ashamed

I can't even put into words all my feelings at the moment

But I know it is going to take a while before I can like myself this Addiction destroys more than you realise and until you stop you do not know the damage it has caused to you never mind your family.

I was blinded by my addiction because I could not break Away but I have now thank goodness it's not easy to now see the truth of what I have done but I have and I will not gamble today

Have to now find peace for myself so my family will not worry about me

Staying strong with very sobering thoughts today

Have a peaceful and happy gambling free day all

Suzanne xx

Hi Suzanne

Sorry to hear you are having a bit of a tricky time at the moment. I hope you find some peace with your family. You are doing all the right things by using this site for support whenever you need it. Be strong and be kind to yourself - you deserve it.

Hi Suzanne,

This journey of recovery opens a pandora box and everything can surface up. You are doing absolutely great and should be proud of yourself. One of the key things in this journey, you have to let the guilt go. Beating yourself up for past mistakes is not gonna help. Please believe with each passing day you will feel better with yourself. Let your loved ones to be there for you, of course they are worried but you are doing all this hard work. You are fantastic person, your determination shines through so just try to look at the positives. Tap yourself on a back girl - a month free from self destruction, it is really worth a quiet celebration with the people you care the most for surrounding you here and now.

Be kind to yourself, take it day at a time..you are worth peace and calmness in your world.

Sandra x

Good morning diary

Day 28

Four weeks ago today I last played online slots

I won't gamble today

Taking one day at a time

Have a good gambling free day all

Suzannexx