my betting diary

Thank you brian,russ and unlucky....today is another day...im off till Wednesday so ive came up to my parents (free train travel helps) ...its time to try and be more positive,theres a lot worse than me in this world...the way i see things today is i could be in the forces or work on the rigs at sea where im away for months on end without seeing family...its payday on friday so im gonnae write an old fashioned letter and put some money in if i havent heard anything as its the little ones birthday in a few weeks and least the ex will know what to buy,havent a clue what to write in the letter though..enough from me for now,today i did not bet,we can do this folks...

hi wp,

thanks for your posts on my diary, and your ongoing support and encouragement.

Hope your are enjoying your time at your parents, and it makes you feel a bit better.

I know how hard it can be to stay on the stright and narrow when times are tough, and i salute you my friend for sticking with it, no matter what is thrown at you - you have my utmost respect and admiration.

tommi

Hi wp

Its a good idea to write that letter m8.Although i hope you get to see your little one before theyre birthday.

Its a good way of looking at things kid there is always someone worse off than you.I hope things work out well for you .All the best Jeff.

Hey wp,

Thanks for your posts on my diary, kind of feel like I'm crawling back defeated, but I know that's not it. I'm back to diary browsing to taking my mind off wanting to have a flutter.

Sounds like your family life is still having its downers, hope you can find your light at the end of the tunnel on that front.

Chin up mate, as you say I won't gamble today and won't gamble tomorrow.

All the best

Ryan

Over 300 days is massive mate, really is. My heart goes out to you with regards to your kids, but really , you must actually stay strong for them. You are a human being wp, are worth as much as the next human being, you have love, a skillset all to give. There are people out there that look down at any type of addict as a failure, and to be honest I would have looked at alcoholics, drug addicts, gambling addicts and thought, just stop, easy, wake up and say thats it for me.

The way I see it we have been given an almighty test, and you my friend, are winning the battle. There is so much good to come out of this, you will realise (if you havent already) that it doesnt matter, how big your house is, how new your car is, what clothes you are wearing etc, You are a strong person mentally. Probabaly a lot stronger than the people we see who SEEM to have everything.

Let me tell you something, when I was around 19/20, I would turn my nose up at anything unless they were branded (clothing, food, cars etc). People knew me as a person who always had the best of clothes, loads of money, flash cars. But I can honestly say, I was never 100% happy. I am as happy now as I was then and I havent bought an item of clothing for well over 18 months, drive a ten year old car, and treat myself to a haircut every couple of months. I'm still the same person inside though,

YOU ARE DOING GREAT and i'm at a stage where if people look down on me , I block them out of my life, or if they are family, let them know that I am the same person with an illness. The reaction of different people is AMAZING when faced with controversy in someone elses life....

DO IT FOR YOU MATE, YOU WILL ?BE HAPPY AS LARRY VERY VERY SOON

Blues

Hey wp... with all the pressures you have in your life and not to gamble for the length of time you have is a great acheivement. Just wanted to say well done!.. regards.. S.A 🙂

Hi wp.

Just wanted to say that i hope things take a turn for the better and that you get to see the kids soon. It's great that you are not turning to gambling during hard times.

All the best.

Curly.

wp,

Just checking in on you. That idea about the letter with a few bob in it sounds great. Very thoughtful.

Best of strength,

Brian

Seems that we're both having a session of reading and posting so I thought that I'd post on your diary!

Love the idea of posting money in a card for your kids. How about making a home made card? Now that would make it much more personal. I now make cards rather than spend £3 on a piece of card and my recipents really love them!

Have a great gamble-free weekend.

Getting There

thank you brian,curly,s.a,blues,ryan,ade,jeff,tommi and gettin there.....in library posting today as ive said in the past far far quicker than the old mobile phone lol.....as soon as ive logged off im personally delivering letter...seems strange being nervous but its been a while since contact....anyways pay day come and gone and no gambling thoughts especially today,the most challenging day of the week in my opinion...today i wont bet,we can do this my friends 😉

Hi wp.

You and your mobile mate...thats what makes your diary all the more.The fact you can use your time to help others from a mobile is amazing.

As for your letter.....fair play.Your on the right track wp.

You want to make it up to the ones you love...your kids.

And you know what - your doing it.Things take time.I said in a post on my diary a while back that i thought time was one of the worst things about this addiction to master once you stop this evil!

When you suddenly stop gambling everything thats real around us is all of a sudden there again.

We have time to realise what was always there but when gambling we always pushed our life aside.Now that we see life again what ever that be - in your case your kids - it does take time to build up trust and to have a close relationship again(not saying you don't).

I know you will get there.

Time sucks mate but its alot better that the important things in life are worth holding out for because we know that when we made a choice to stop we made that for us and the ones we love!

Keep doing what your doing mate and i know someday it will all come good.

All the Best

Viggo.

Hi wp

Thanks for your post on my diary. You are right that I'm lucky to still have a car even if not serviced for 3 years! I think that just one more gambling binge could have taken it away along with all the other things that I have sold to keep funding the gambling drug.

Good to see that your resolve is very strong and that the rewards of staying clean are also happening for you. It's a long haul but I hope that your family recognise your efforts and the change that has made.

I agree with your comment about Saturday being the most difficult day, but that old life destroying ritual has to be broken so I'm doing a bit of reading on here this afternoon.

Day 72 for me and today I will not gamble.

Keep it going, you are doing just great.

David

PS The wine was fab!

Thanks for the message wp,i hope you had a good time visiting your parents this last week:),and i hope by the time you read this the letter has been delivered and as had a positive effect on your ex:),i was thinking about you yesterday actually,we had our grandaughter for a few hours and i thought about your situation whilst i was entertaining her!!!,it's not fair on you pal,whatever the reasons your ex cooks up!!,anyway lets hope things improve for you on that front soon:).Stay strong wp,your doing a great job.

Seano.

Doing just fine by the sounds of it.. well done! All the best in recovery.. S.A 🙂

With thanks to viggo,david,seano and s.a....well that ll be that then !!! The letter backfired 🙁 i struggled to deliver it yesterday but with a deep breath in it went...for fox sake thats my own home too !! Anyways got texts this mornin and basically alls goin nice and tranquil for past few weeks till i got in touch..i tried to explain all i want is to see bairns but its me who tramples all over her and makes her emotional..ave got feelings too yet i supposedly make out its all about ME ME ME !! not only am i a comp gambler but im also a comp LIAR....Cant change the past but this is a new me...anyways cant seem to get it into her head,as my old pals stumper and seano said maybes time to draw a line across the sand....another day goes by without seein them...on the positive side today i WONT bet...stay strong folks,this can be done 🙁 P.s easy sayin its payday got myself a large pizza last night for x factor only t find it was buy one get one free lol what am i t do wi an extra pizza...never mind itll be nice to have later lol..have a good gamble free day everyone 😉