My Diary - Day by Day

Day 165 - 18/7/15

My sisters Hen Weekend!

Leaving Paige at home with daddy! Scary

Day 166 - 19/7/15

Hen weekend was good - although come home and OH admitted to gambling last night 🙁

Oh dear.

Sorry to hear the OH didn't do ok, but don't worry. The grass is green and the sky is blue...and little Paige is good. So no worries!

You are still strong and that's the most important thing. Shame I don't know your name but keep on trucking!

With you all the way....kiss little Paige for me!

Night night! Xxxxx

Hi I am on day two of giving up this is the first time I joined a site like this

Sorry to read about OH, but you are doing amazing 167 days,

Keep concentrating on you and little Paige, you are doing great.

Suzanne xxx

Day 167 - 20/7/15

Thanks for the support. I was keeping anon so that i could share honestly without shame of people knowing who i am (as no one i know personally knows about my problem and i am paranoid that by revealing my name someone on here might know me and it is shameful) I might share when i feel ready. So for now i will still be Paige's mommy 🙂

Good luck Jav - this is the first step in a long journey - you can do it.

Day 168 - 21/7/15

Keep it up! 🙂

Hi sweetheart,

It is NOT shameful admitting you have a problem, however I totally understand why you might want to keep this anonymous. Just stay straight, stay strong and after as many days as you have done, there is only one result which is a good one.

I still worry about your OH. Does he have a relationship with little Paige? Not meaning to be nosy, but if he doesn't you need to check what you want from that relationship.

You are doing astonishing, however I'm scared you are being dragged back. Just keep going and know we are all with you.....

Day 169 - 22/7/15

Another day done 🙂

Yep OH is a great father just a rubbish gambler! 🙁 He has been a lot better but has blips - before he would spend all his money - now he pays me first (so i cant really complain what he wastes the rest on its just such a shame - its not just the money though as it makes you depressed/angry/upset too when you gamble)

Hopefully he will get there too when he is ready 🙂

He sounds like my oldest son Hun, great father to LM buys him anything and everything, but gambling makes him irritable,depressed, and reclusive, nothing we say or do will stop them, they have to really want to stop themselves, am positive that your OH and my son will see red one day(hopefully soon)

You are doing fantastic keep going

Suzanne xxx

Day 170 - 23/7/15

Its true the effects of gambling span wide. Its not just losing money - its the emotions that go with it too. Really annoyed today as the OH stayed up all night to wait for his wages to go in and blew it! He sent me my money first. You are right it has to be their decision no-one will be able to stop them unless they want to - just hope its sooner rather than later for both!

Eeesh, so sorry your OH blew it.

You say he is a great father, and I have no reason to doubt that as I'm not there. But is he?

I get a little cross over people not trying to kick this, especially with little ones like your Paige. You are doing astonishing, I cannot believe how well you are doing. I'm totally in awe of you my girl!

However your OH will drag you back. Run for the hills. You are being an amazing mom, an amazing crutch but your OH don't care. Time to go, for your sake.

Sounds harsh but, after what you have given and sacrificed, I can't see another way.

Stay straight. We are all with you. Xxxxx

Day 171 - 24/7/15

OH gambled again! Starting to get really P****d off now 🙁 It does frustrate me that he cant do it for Paige - its enough motivation for me!

Day 172 - 25/7/15

Another day half done - been a bit tempted lately - had a lot of emails/letters with bonuses but kept strong 🙂

Keep strong for yourself and Paige, I really admire you, it's hard enough giving up, but living with a gambler must make it even more difficult to abstain yourself. Keep going, one day at a time, you are doing great x