Just had the courage to read comments - was so scared as I feel like I have let everyone down which I have. So glad to have the support still here. Feeling low but proud to have resisted depositing for 3 days it feels like forever and I could have more easily gambled than not. Red I have been drowning but I am ready to swim to shore x
Takes enormous courage to come back - well done and when you're ready everyone will be waiting to help you through the next patch. Stay safe.
So glad you came back, proud of you too 🙂 xx
You did it before and you can do it again. 1 day at a time
Please never be scared to come to your diary...you haven't let anyone down. In my opinion, there are very few people who stop and just stay stopped. For some of us it takes a few goes around before we really get it. You came back and are starting again...that's what matters. Learn from what went wrong, work out your triggers, put barriers in place, get help and support. You fell off the bike, but you're back in the saddle and going forwards again...just keep pedalling 🙂
Wishing you well. LifeBegins x
Day 5 - 18/5/16
Thanks all - still here and on Day 5 now.
It will probably take me until the end of the year or even longer to pay back the debt this last derailing caused! Trying to stay positive but its hard. I know each gf day stops the debt going up anymore but its going to take a while to start bringing it down.
I know I am the worst version of myself when I gamble and I dont know why I do it - logically it makes no sense to gamble
Hey girl, good to see you fighting again:)) you can and you will get the fog out of your head, it can be trial and error for a while, don't ever give up on giving up,
Suzanne xxx
Only one more day till 1 week achievement again 🙂
You're not a bad person and it's just your mind fighting you. It is an addiction, not who you are. Try not to let the debt eat away at you. Like you say, it won't go up as long as you don't gamble anymore and that's enough for now. One day at a time x
Day 6 - 19/5/16
It would have been so easy to gamble today - resisted temptation and although its hard i know it starts to get easier over time. Not giving up on giving up x
One week today girl, keep strong and keep going.
Suzanne xxx
One week today girl, keep strong and keep going.
Suzanne xxx
Hi.. if its any consolation, ive got a 4 year loan to pay back from 3 weeks of gambling, your not alone.
As you say it does start to get easier, given a little gamble free time. We have to come to terms with debts and broken self-esteem. We can heal ourselves. It just takes time thats all.
Keep up the good work as i do the same
S.A 🙂
Hi my angels,
Getting back up is not easy but you're doing it. Is there any chance to put blocks on ur devices?
Temptation can get better of us and it doesn't take long to put thoughts into action...however you can prevent it from happening! Secure yourself and your finances, look for other ways to occupy yourself, ..you know deep down this is not what you want...destruction results in inner death..simple and honest thruth. (Sorry for sounding blunt..but i talk from experience)
You deserve more, your little girl deserves more..i know you want the best for your family, & i know you can provide it if you put your mind and heart to it.
We are rooting for you - keep on fighting!
One day at a time
Sandra
1 week today chic! 🙂 it's always easy to gamble and I can feel those little urges coming back again every now and then. It'll never go completely and we have so much to pay back but not gambling will always feel so much better than giving in ever will. Keep logging in and wracking up those days! Proud of you too xx
Day 9 - 22/5/16
Feeling good i have gotten this far and not given in. OH gambled regardless of saying he is going to stop each week. I cant say too much as I messed up too but in the last year I have been gamble free more than gambling and I am trying - doesnt seem like he even tries!
Well done on 9 days x on your way to two weeks! 🙂
I know it's so hard when they continue to gamble and feels like a smack in the face when ur trying to make life better. Yes u messed up but like u say u've gone for so long before without a change from him. Try not to see your efforts in relation to each other. Focus on you and baby girl and how your efforts benefit u. He'll either want to do it for himself or not. In the meantime, you're Amazing!!! 🙂 xx
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