new beginning

Hey Paul...mega well done on two weeks and one day...fandabidozy x

Hi Paul,

Is everything ok on the lilypad?

Twinklyr x

Good afternoon,

Day 0

Unfortunately my lily pad has a hole in it. I'm sinking again.

Not ready to talk about it yet.

On a positive note I'm away to get my wife flowers and a couple of beers for me.

I hope everyone is okay.
Paul.

Hey Paul,

I'm guessing you didn't close that last door then. Get the self exclusion done from that last bookies, and find another lily pad. You're not sunk yet, just a bit wet and forlorn. Time to dry out, you've done so well this past fornight so all is not lost.

Wishing you well,

Twinklyr

Hi Paul,

I still believe you are getting to the safe road, get straight back up and keep marching forwards, even though you are wounded.

Take care and don't think too negative, the addiction thrives on that .you can do this:)

Suzanne xxx

Hi Paul , a minor blip on the lily pond of life , throwing you a life jacket , so now swim to the next safe place pull yourself up and carry on where you left off ! Stay positive my friend !

Hi Paul , me again and just saw your post to admin , don't worry mate it's not you that's caused an upset , your all good buddy .

Hello Alan and I wished,

Yes i am fine thanks for your genuine concern. There are some good people on here.

Yeah i was worried i upset someone but i don't think it's me thankfully.

Okay i left one bookies open and i need to self exclude. This is near work. Today i had ВЈ8. I went in playing 5p roulette. I managed to leave with £8.50. So i bought a pizza and pink roses for the wife.
I spent it wisely thankfully.

The only reason i stopped gambling was because my bus was coming. So thankfully my pay goes to my wife from now on. I'm carrying little money from now on but i need to self exclude from that bookies.

I need to take positives though and get back on my lily pad. Life has been better recently.Toad needs to warn off predators and paddle this lily pad to quiet waters.

I see a sunny day with dragonflys in the air. A sweet smell of honeysuckle and the chirp of birds. The scurry of wild life. A happier place were Toad can flourish.

Toad

Morning All,

Last day in work before the holidays.

Feeling okay today. I hope you all have a good day. Keep the ship sailing in the calm waters.

5.37pm update. I bought 10 tins of English Tetley smooth beer. My goodness what a tasty beverage and it wasn't even chilled fully.

Happy Easter to everyone.

Paul

Hello All,

I'm staying in a bit recently. Today was payday. Thankfully my wages didn't go to the turfs. I couldn't put us through that again. It was hell.

My wife is looking after the finances.

Back to work tomorrow 🙁

I hope you all had a good day.

Paul.

Morning All,

Back to work 🙁 Up at 6am this morning.

£5 budget so need to buy lunch. No turfs today.

Nothing new to report.

Good luck all.

Paul.

Hi Paul , thanks for the drop by fella always appreciated , you seem to be thinking things through much better these days Paul , like a man with a plan so to speak and I think that's great my friend . You look after yourself and I'll catch up with you soon . With respect . Alan

Hello Alan,

Thankyou for your comments it cheered me up.

Last month i lost £1700 in 2 days. My worst loss ever. To be honest it took me a month for it to sink in what I had did.

So i feel i've had to use my head now. It was a living hell for both of us.

Thankfully my pay is with my wife. I have less worry now. It's what i have to do.

A big barrier!!

Last month I also came home drunk and took my belt off to kill myself. That scared me alot.

I never want that again.

Thankyou Alan and all for your help and support. If i can stop others making my mistakes it would mean alot. I wouldn't wish the pain i have felt on anyone.

But i remain positive. Today is a new beginning. The clouds are passing leaving a clear blue sky.

Good luck all.
Paul.

Hey Paul...just plopped over to say hi x

Hello Loxxie and All,

Last day in work then i'm away for a weekend with my wife for two days. It should be relaxing.

It will be better knowing that i haven't wasted money.

I've been getting a fiver a day. It's enough really compared to what i used to spend.

We are going to London late April for IVF treatment. It's costly so i can't waste my wages again. I've never been to London so it will be good to see new places aswell.

Anyway i hope everyone is keeping well.

Paul.