Looking forward to the long weekend...breakfast with my girls and grandchildren this morning...one of which has come home with nanny for the day !. ..happy with that as no longer thinking ...argh that may interfere with my online slot playing...get together in the bar tonight for a youngsters pre 18th birthday ; )
First cricket match tomorrow night....so hoping for a good weekends takings...then day off on Monday with hubby and son...lovely....and not a slot machine in sight !
Stay safe people...keep your guards up and be happy....without gambling life's great xx
Sounds like you have some great plans Loxxie, have a fab time and hope the sunshines over your bank holiday weekend!
All good here thanks...nothing to report....very busy weekend in the bar...greattttt
Looking forward to day off tomorrow....
Your doing great...soon be in the centenary club...well done x
Nearly at 4 mnths gamble free now...
When I think back to the early days when I faced up to having a problem with online slots it kind of seems unreal !
But as us compulsive gamblers have all found out the hard way....it is VERY REAL ...ive let go of the losses...ive been open ..honest..and transparent. ..ive faced the music with family and got debts under control...bills being paid when they should....and still got money left over each week....I feel stronger. ..my self confidence has returned...I'm enjoying people's company again....and I'm learning alot about myself again...
Those online slots were fun....in the becoming...yes I won...but lost way more....and if I hadn't stopped when I did....who knows we're it would have left me....so to all newcomers who are scared...on the edge....and looking for help....please....take the time to read...read...read...the diarys on here....they all contain wonderfull advice....on how to help you stop gambling....but it has to be done by you....and you only....and yes it's dam hard...but it's a fight worth fighting....and as I'n my very first post i said. ..please let my strength continue.....well I still say that everynight.....and always will....because I never want to feel the pain I was feeling four months ago x
Wow loxxie nearly 4 months you have done so well hun. I cant believe how fast the days a going. May already soon be christmas lol. But one huge difference this year for both of us we will br gamble free. Im hoping mine will be better as last year was so low i didn't even put a tree up but this year i will hopefully be in my new house, christmas will all be paid for in september and hopefully will get christmas off for the first time in 10 years. Well i better get some work done speak soon hun xxx
Thanks merc...xxx
Soooo 114 days gamble free !
No magic answers to how I've got to this day
I wanted to do it
I was honest...transparent with finances
One to one counselling
Blocks on internet
Laptop given away
Has it been easy ?
NO ...not in the early weeks...with time it gets easier
Do I think of online slots ?. ..very very rarely a thought pop's in my head...but I say to my gambling head ..." your having a laugh...i dont do that anymore " !
Can I say I will never gamble again ?
No....I can't and won't say that....what I do say is I will try every day for the rest of my life to never spin a slot again....I will always keep my triangle broken to protect me from going back to the dark side of gambling...
Is life better without gambling ?
100% IT SURE IS ...
And as I said in my very first post.
PLEASE LET MY STRENGHT CONTINUE ..
Have a good weekend peeps...and if your reading my dairy as a "broken newcomer "...well....I was you four months ago....and things will change for the better...if YOU change them...xx
Massive well done loxxie on 114 amazing days, Great attitude too:)))
Suzanne xxx
Thanks suzzanne...
Yo deanooooo
You are a sweetie and I'm glad your here with me....and the rest of us....you can have as many beers...when ever you want...and that on me !. ...and your all safe in loxxies bar as I've sent the fobts sales rep on his travels ! with a polite " f**k off "...xxx
And another new week begins....117 days into my recovery. ...feeling strong and life's good... .few odd thoughts of those vile on line slots...not urges to play...just every so often and at no particular time a 'slot pops into my head '...weird. ..but can tell myself..' lol..I don't do that anymore '...glad that my triangle keeps me safe ....life sure is better...and simpler without gambling....keep trying folks...you can do this x
17 weeks gamble free....
Chuffed ...yes I am !
Am I recoverd ?
NO...and I never will be...
But I will work hard everyday to STAY in recovery !
Online slots !
Who needs them to make there life better ?
I THOUGHT I DID !
I THOUGHT THEY DID MAKE LIFE BETTER !
BUT THEY DON'T...
THEY MAKE LIFE WORSE !
So...for that reason they won't be getting any more from me....life's to good without them x
Well done on the 17 weeks loxxie....keep up the good work x
Great going on 17 weeks loxxie, be proud of yourself, and keep that mindset one step ahead:))
Suzanne xxx
Counselling today...not been for a month as she said im doing so well...this will be number 8 of permitted 12...going to make this the last one and "bank" the last four just in case I get a "melt down " in the next few months...I feel good with this idea...I've really enjoyed the sessions and have learnt so much about me...the addiction. ..and things in general...it's given me the tools to move forward with life....and the tools to more importantly...not to run back to the online slots and hide when life gets tricky !
For me...along with family support...you guys on here and dam hard work on my part...the counselling has been invaluable ..
So go grab it if you've not arranged it yet...what you've got to loose...and weird as It sounds weve all paid for it over and over again ! lol
I'm not thinking for one moment that as my counselling ends im cured !
I know I never will be...what I do know is that I can never ...spin those slots again...
And my promise to myself is I will keep my triangle broken ...and I will work at my recovery daily...everyday !
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