Many congratulations on 300 not out.
Best wishes x
Well done my luvver (said in the best West Country accent I can muster)! You be amazing sweet cheeks, and what the people on here don't see is how lovely you are to the Facebookers too. Race you to a year (I know, I know, I have a head start lol)! xxx
300 days? That's fantastic. Clearly a lot of hard work and effort has gone into those days...and it's all paid off. Good for you. Onwards and upwards LB x
Sending many congratulations, 300 days - whoop, whoop!!!
May you continue to enjoy reaping your rewards x
Jeezzzz
Never had piles in my life !
Well...untill now...w*f ?
So....decided to Google why they might have decided to arrive un invited now !
Childbirth...not in last 15 yrs ! .
Constipation...nope !
Ahhh...sitting for very long periods of time....Yes...that bloody dinning room chair ....
All the hours sat at my laptop spinning away...
Jeeez. ..my addiction realy did come back and bite my arsee !
Do your worse alan and deano...
I'm open and honest now lol
: )
I did mention to alan the other day. You were a pain in the a*s
What's the difference between hemorrhoids and engagement
When hemorrhoids is over you at least get your ring back.
Sit down loxxie this could be a record amount of post's
Allrighty then as I'm alway's up for a challenge I will :))
Lot's of advice for you Lox but first I'd like to thank you on behalf of the forum for sharing :))
Preperation H as you probably know is good on the hole , in the hole and around the hole it shrinks the little bug..gers , you could also try Ice poles ( and I'm not talking about frosty Polish men ) it doesn't matter what flavour as you wont be eating them afterwoods or giving them to the grandkids when they come to stay with you on a weekend ( unless their being really naughty of course ) .
Seriously there's nothing more soothing than a stiff frosty pop when you feel like your bunch of grapes feel like their dragging along the floor behind you :((.
I actually suffered quite badly with them about 10 years ago and they wouldn't clear up , so ended up having them removed , this involves A Camera with what can only be described as the reverse of a fishing hook disgorger being inserted up your jacksie , but not before self administering an Enema AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH ! , then they basicly grab your pile one at a time and place an elastic band over the offending bunch of grapes which cuts the blood supply and makes it drop off ( after about 3 day's walking as though youv'e s**t yourself ) and feeling that way too .
Not pleasant but deffo works as no sign of the offending bunch of hoodlums since :))
You learn so much on this forum dont you ? , hope it helps :))
xx
Is there anything our Alan doesn't know?
There's also the old wife's tale of covering you buuuuum hole with a piece of streaky bacon and threatening it with a hammer , not tried this personally and you may need the assistance of a loved one or a close friend ? :))
Or you could just move to America as there's lots of people waking this morning that feel just like you ?
I haven't heard back so I'm assuming your looking for Ice poles ? , Frozen sausages are ok too but make sure their 4inch and not 8s :)) .
Oh Lox , youv'e started something now , just wait till everyone else gets home and chips in ( sorry no pun intended ) xx
Im not getting involved in this childish banter, I'll only end up getting myself into a pile of s**t
Thanks so much for the usefull advice guys...Alan...the ice poles ..any flavour do ?
And I'm assuming tinned sausages wouldn't really do the job...no real substance to them is there ?
Deanooos...I loved the joke. ..
I lost my engagement ring years ago...maybe I could ask for a new one for chrimbo !
Ktf. ..please hang around...I fear some yellow / red cards may be needed later..and I know I can rely on you if the amigos step out of line lol..
But seriously boys...I think the gambling commission could use this in there safe warnings...
" pro longed sitting at laptops to gamble. ..had been known to cause piles " !
Ooh...wonder if I could claim ?
No ! Don't think PPI stands for "Pile Protection Insurance "
Ps and tell Martin He'll get piles if he keeps sitting on that fence too long :)) xx
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