Online slots...

Hiya Loxxie hun thanks for post and encouragement:)) god yeah the urge I had this morning knocked me for six it was like I'd never stopped gambling. Just right back in that zone again, scary it is so very glad yes I've got blocks. Hope your ok hun, it'll be busy time of year for you now I should imagine with the pub ;)) take care hun Lu xx

Morning Luvvverly hope your alllllllriiiiiight ? :)) .

Thanks for the post last night , I saw it before bed but was too knackered to answer ( busy night in the shop , fish on fridays and all ) :))

A little down at the mo Lox TBH, Social services just don't keep you in the loop very much and we'll not know much till Monday but it's not looking as though they'll go back with their parents , Dad wasn't at contact just mum as he's upset and they've (Social) have cut contact from every week to every fortnight so I think that speaks volumes , you also feel a bit for the parents too , as much as their parenting skills wern't great I think it's now really hit them that their probably not going to see their kids for too much longer , which is really sad . I just think sometimes they'd be better spending money on working with the parents to try and find a better way forward , I know not in all cases but there can be exceptions .

Anyway what will be Eh ? and it's all back to acceptance of the things we cannot change and at the end of the day it's the kids protection at stake .

My partner is lovely to put up with me TBH , and I'm lucky to have her in my life , after my bad break up and divorce she was like a breath of fresh air coming into my life and I need to pop the question one of these day's :)).

Good to hear youv'e a lot of good tghings to look forward to, all the result of your hard work and dedication in giving up the slots no doubt and it's great months on that it just keeps getting better , you deserve it love , so enjoy !! .

I'll catch up with you soon and hopefully have some news , one way or another !.

Have a great weekend Hun :)) xxx

Hey Loxxie thanks for post hun hope everything good with you and yours. I've some catching up to do on here as totally addicted to Vikings seasons lol anyway take care hun Lu xx

Hey Loxxie thanks for post hun hope everything good with you and yours. I've some catching up to do on here as totally addicted to Vikings seasons lol anyway take care hun Lu xx

300 odd days ago i was a mess..
Totally addicted to online slots...
In arrears with just about everything. ...feeling ashamed...guilty...full of self hate...sick of lies...and juggling my life...scared to tell hubby...scared of the fallout...scared my adult children would diss own me...and actually scared to look in the mirror. .
Well.....yes obviously the early days after the initial shock to family were pretty emotional....things to sort...things that had to be said on both sides. ...and for me personally....my addiction to fight....
I gave all those that matter to me my promise that I would fight it like a pro ....they promised to be with me all the way....
And that's what's happened....and it's been a pleasure to get stronger each day....not just me...but as a family...not easy all the time....but then lifes not easy is it ?
So ....tomoz...I'm off to London with my wonderfull daughters...couple days...the bodyguard show...dinner in Covent garden. ..Thames cruise..winterwonderland....and quality time with the daughters I feared id loose...
I'm not posting this to show off...I'm posting to give hope....to show you that....no matter how bad things seem....how desperate you feel....how strong your chains of addiction feel around your neck...
It can ....and will improve....if YOU change things...if YOU fight with all your strength to regain your life
It will slowly all fall into place...
I did...and boy do I feel great...
And I will fight...today...tomoz..and everyday.....to keep it that way..
Watch out London....loxxie and her girls are coming to town ! X

Loxxie, well done hun, this is really great to hear and you must feel great. Keep up the fight and have a brilliant time in London xx

Great things come to those who work their a$$es off and never give up. Enjoy your 300 days!

Cathyx

Jesus loxxie I've just had the enigma team try to decipher that post to me this morning. They haven't a clue lol.

I'll give it a go

Builder's day is the day all the lads break up and come down the boozer?

Spoons as in withers?

Elves being put in Sexual positions on the fire place?

Are you sure that's fog not carbon emissions lol

Great to see my favourite landlady still does funny.
If you need anymore idea's for the pub how about free glass with every pint.

Are we still on for loxxbury next year?

X

Last week this time I was on a train to London with my girls....
Wondefull time had...just the 3 of us...lots of laughs...lots of memories made..
Far to much walking...daughter wears a fit bit thing...20 miles in total !. ...oh well...walked off the food we ate ! Lol
Will defo be having another girlie break next year....
Trade here still amazing..big party here this weekend....and the garden and French doors are ready .....so bring it on !
Kids and grandkids all ok....usual hiccups....but nothing to fret over..
Me and hubby....well actually it's ok....no hang on....it's better than ok...we both seem more considerate to each other....and we defo communicate more...he seems to respect how much I put into the pub....which is also our home...and supporting me with it...physically and financially ....he's a bit of a closed book since his cancer.....but a lovely simple status he put on Facebook says a huge amount...so we're heading in the right direction...
Me....I'm fine...
Thankfully no urges to run to the slots....not even any thoughts....
I'm just being loxxie....wife...mum...nanny.. friend and landlady...i think its called being normal....lol
Looking forward to Christmas like I use to years ago...
Was going to move montains today....whole day to myself....
But actually all I've done so far Is mooch about on here....drink coffee and eat a large bar of chocolate !
Do I feel guilty ?
Nopeeeee ...I'm at peace with myself....and a bit of me time was just the chill I needed....lol
Soooooo I'm hoping all the old timmers on here are plodding on happy and well.....
And I'm telling any new comers that.....
No matter how low you feel...
How scared....
How alone your chains of addiction have made you feel...
How impossible your future looks..
It can ....and will get better....
Make changes...
Seek support...
Talk....
Only you can make your life better...
Do it....for you....
Trust me....you won't regret it...

Hello Luveeeerly :)).

Just wanted to stop off and thank you for all the kind post's of late , I haven't got back to before but really appreciate it Loxxie :)).

Still in the doldrums a bit but I'm still plugging away and still moving forward gamble free , so I'll take that all day long :)).

So glad you had a great time in London with yer family :)) there's nothing like a good day out or two with your loved ones around is there , also good to hear that things are good at the homestead both with the bar and the other half it's amazing how things improve on every front when were no longer in the grip of addiction :))

I am going to take your advice and chill for a little , there's so much going on at the mo and I really don't want to post when I'm feeling this way , it's a little of everything at the mo , the kids , my health and good ol xmas looming too , I close the shop down on the 16 th for a couple of weeks so at least that'll be off my mind and I can have a bit of a rest :)) .

Going to try and post to all the gang over the next week or so and have a catch up and will probably start with Derick (Deano ) Zoolander ( please tell me youv'e seen the film ) ? It's just his photo ( he say's it's not him but ? ) lookes like a model , " Lone Wolf Deano " I reckon :)) .

Anywhoos I just wanted to say a big thank you for all the support youv'e given me and for still making me smile with the posts and I'll talk to you soon Honey :)) .

Stay safe Loxx and doing what works eh ! xx

Hi Loxxie hun that's a great post of yours and you sound really happy nice one hun long may it continue! Take care Lu xx

More importantly you have 35 more sleeps. What a turn around from your first day's. Get the champers on Ice. Thanks as always for making me smile x

Massive erection in the new garden !
Excited muchley !
: )
: )
: )

...................................................................................................?..............................................................................................:))

Not had one of those for a while :((

Yeah , and that's what I was talking about having a tent in the garden ! Honestly your so rude to think otherwise :)) .

Ok , back to chillin :)) xx