Still devestated but determined

Hi Paul, Well done for overcoming the urge. How is it going still watching football considering it was a major part of your gambling self. I never gambled on football / sports so it’s nothing that bothers me to watch. However some people on here have to stop watching sports on here to stop them from relapsing and some learn to love it for the just the game it is. It’s all down to the individual so only you will know that. Have you started counselling yet? If so hope it’s going well.

Keep going mate. Your doing really well.

OAU

I think stopping watching sport may be beneficial to you, little changes I’ve made in my life like not listening to talk sport on the radio, choc full of betting its a disgraceful listen now.Ive cancelled sky sports and watch my footy elsewhere, you mentioned earlier about going out drinking and being tempted and how to stop it....simple....only take enough cash out to drink and get home with, leave cards at home.If you aren’t in debt then good, I am, so i turn the offer of a night down and pay it off debt.

There’s tonnes of solutions if we want them and act on them, no excuses, having the urge is one thing, putting all the blocks in place is another.keep going, good luck.

Hi Onwardsandupwards and Holycrosser. I feel OK with watching sports at the moment. I ve always been a football fan and feel I can still get enjoyment out of watching games where I have no financial interest and it might even enhance my enjoyment to be watching just for the love of the game. I ll no longer however feel the need to watch games from the Australian league first thing on a Saturday morning where I ve put £2500 on a team I know nothing about because I m chasing money that I lost in the casino the night before and wont find myself watching the scores online from obscure tennis games. It does annoy me when watching football however to see how huge a part gambling plays in the sport now. No advertising opportunity missed by the bookmakers and feel that it is irresponsible of teams to take sponsorship from them when they are doing such damage to untold numbers of people. Hopefully in time, we will see a much more responsible approach being taken. I do have debt Hollycrosser, but I m single and when there's a chance to go out on a Friday night with friends then it's difficult to say no when the alternative is a night in on my own. It would make much more sense to pay that money towards the debt but I also don't want to find myself wallowing at home knowing my friends are out having a blast. As you advise, I no longer go out with cards and take a sensible amount of cash out to last me the night. I think that may have to be the way it is for a long time but I can live with that. I'm conscious that I cant get complacent there by thinking that I've got a handle on things and that I will get through a night out with no casino on willpower alone, as it could cost thousands. If I ever even lost a tenner to a casino or bookmakers again then I'd be furious with myself. I have started counselling Onwards. Have had two sessions so far and another one scheduled for Friday this week. The boy who does the counselling is a really decent guy and I'm finding it beneficial to open up and say the truth out loud.

Cheers OAU and HC, good to know that I'm not alone in this.

19 days in and won’t gamble today so look forward to seeing the number 20 on my profile tomorrow. Feels like a long time even though I know it’s still very very early days. 3rd counseling session tomorrow which will help keep me on the straight and narrow. Feel like a much more sensible attitude to money is coming back to me

Thanks Paul for your encouraging post on my diary.
Well done on 20 days gf.
I can certainly relate to the blowing money whilst drunk and chasing on sports I know nothing about,the gambling hangover the next day has got to be the worst feeling in the world.

I've lost count how many times I've given up for good over the past 20 years and tried numerous things,and have actually abstained for lots of long periods- but the one thing I've never really conquered is giving up the fantasy bets whilst in recovery.
My recent attempt to quit lasted from June to feb but all that time I followed a horse tipster,willing his selections to lose,placed fantasy bets in my head on football,cricket.
It's been keeping me in the game and the inevitable happened,that first bet.
Once that first bet happen your back to square one - if it wins you want to play up your winnings,lose and we chase.
My recovery this time is going to be a complete break.
I wish you well in your recovery and quit those fantasy bets cos they will eventually become reality and you can win cos you can't stop.

Keep it going, each say that passes you are a winner and saving money

Well done Paul you are doing really well. I am 35 days today but find it difficult like you. The urges are there luckily but not every day. I have blocked my cards online using my secure key ( i bank with HSBC) i make sure i have enough money for the weekend. I leave the secure key in my work drawer. Even though i have blocks like gamstop i still don’t trust myself. I cannot unblock these cards then until i get back to work. This is working so far as during the day i am strong. It is bed time when i want to gamble this was the dangerous time for me! When i have been out with friends and use money they have commented why I don’t pay with my card but i say things like ‘ i’ve left it on the kitchen worktop by mistake ‘

Thanks! A little bit hungover today but not too bad. Took £60 out last night and had some change from that. In days gone by I d have spent well over £100 even without any gambling. 3 weeks today my new life started. A few urges here and there and my life is far from perfect but the world looks a lot brighter without gambling.

4 weeks ago yesterday I was at an all time low having lost a ridiculous amount in an online casino whilst very drunk. Now 29 days GF and I won’t pretend that life is perfect but removing the huge cloud of gambling has certainly made the world a much brighter place. Very much looking forward to completing a monthly pay cycle with no gambling and still having money in the bank. Feel confident that I ll never gamble again but conscious of not becoming complacent and always needing a little bit of planning to make sure I don’t slip up. Will probably come on here a little bit less now but will still check in every week or so. It can be quite heartbreaking to see the constant stream of new arrivals but this website has been hugely helpful to me and has no doubt literally saved many peoples lives. 

Good luck with it all mate, you are doing great, it’s very early and remember this is for life.

i find checking in most days keeps me focused and remember to keep planning ahead for stuff to do, this gambling can creep up at any time, never ever get complacent mate.

Finally made it through my first monthly pay cycle gf. Felt great to have money leftover and no bank charges for being overdrawn at any stage. Less thoughts of gambling and not been seriously tempted to fall off the wagon for a while. Now looking forward to getting through my first colander month gf so that I can look at my bank statement for April without wanting to punch myself in the face. Will stay strong, stay positive and keep planning ahead to avoid the perfect storm of time, place and money. 

Great news mate, every day is a little step, long journey keep going and take nothing for granted as this thing can creep up at any time.

well done , it’s my pay too and it’s all budgeted 

72 days today. Still seeing a Counselor but down to once every 3 weeks or so. He’s a really good lad. Confident that I ll never gamble again but not complacent. Always on guard and planning ahead

Posted by: Paulscottb

72 days today. Still seeing a Counselor but down to once every 3 weeks or so. He’s a really good lad. Confident that I ll never gamble again but not complacent. Always on guard and planning ahead

Never be confident mate, one day at a time, the hard yards will always be there, dangerous times still ahead.

you have done amazing, keep going.

Made it to 108 days. Life isn’t perfect but it is so much better without the stress of gambling. I think a lot less about gambling and feel am now in the habit of not gambling. I am conscious that while my old life feels like a long time ago, it’s actually still early days. I still have about 1000 days left to pay off the debt at my current rate of payment but aim to reduce that time frame now that o ve steadied the ship and have re learned the value of money. Anyone who is reading this and thinking about stopping gambling, please do it. Do it now and embrace a new life.