A combination of circumstances has led me to where I am now, which is the basis for stopping gambling.
It's rare that I reach this mental state but here I am and I will make the most of it.
It’s not easy pal, tell us your story, it helps.
welcome and hope we can help.
I am not new here, this is a cathartic exercise for me and a move away from my very old diary. This latest episode starts after a 72 hour binge, which although not financially devastating, it has taken its toll on me mentally. It risked my job which I attended without sleep and only through good luck am I the only one who knows of my poor performance in something I usually take great pride in doing well.
Hi ricks,
It takes a lot of courage to deal with a relapse and we are all here to support you. Maybe you would like to contact us directly to talk this through. https://www.gamcare.org.uk/get-support/talk-to-us-now/
The lines are open from 8 am to midnight every day.
Have you started to put blockers in place yet?
Kind wishes
Gabriele
It is not courage that has brought me to this mental state, from which I know from previous experience is a rare position that can be used for personal good. It is a combination of many things but bravery is not one.
Usually I am not a day counter but today is day 3.
This is the beginning of day 6.
Now day 7.
I have regrets about giving up forever.
Day 8. I know I have to.
This difficulty feels like new although I'm aware this always happens. The books I took away with me remain unread for now. They are both about addiction and are the only ones that have made some sort of sense to me . I had to dust them off my shelf. It is now day 9 and the past feels so close behind. I know to rack up a few weeks means it will start to get easier and I will be able to concentrate more on better things.
Day 10.
I have so much good in my life right now but it is tempered with some bad stuff. I'm so looking forward to meeting my youngest later, he is 10 and has been away taking part in a historical moment, another one he will never forget in his life. I am a proud dad. Also I have to help my oldest who is in a dark place and I'm feeling pretty powerless. This is life I guess, especially as a parent.
As for me, I'm struggling but not gambling. My dreams had gambling flowing through my veins.
Do you mind me asking you did you do between 2009 and this year. I see you have been on the board a long time.
I was either being a coping cg or on smart recovery and safeharbor or practicing Rational Recovery.
Also I attended the NPGC in London, had counselling through Gamcare twice, tried using Baclofen amongst other things.
Day 11
I am calm.
Day 16 or is it 17.
I have not been online, I have given up my smart phone. It makes my wife feel better.
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