After nearly 3 years of putting up with my partners mood swings, lack of money, lies, and lack of motivation or interest, he has admitted he was gambling and is in debt. Unfortunately before this came out I cheated on him with an ex as I was just so lost and confused. I can’t get over the fact I am going to have to try and support our family on my part time wages and my savings, he can’t deal with the fact I strayed due to his behaviour. We have 2 small babies, I’m lost.
Dear c3n8a2lzhj,
Welcome to the Forum,
I’m sorry to hear that things have been so difficult for you and your partner. You have done well to reach out for some peer support on this Forum. You are not alone and many others will be able to empathise with you. It is unfortunate but for some people experiencing problematic levels of gambling to hide what is happening which may cause their partner distress. Please do prioiritse your and your babies basic needs first- shelter, food and warmth.
Tackling Financial Insecurity Together | Turn2us may be able to advise on any benefits or grants available depending on your circumstances if working part-time only.
If you have not already please do consider calling us on the GamCare Helpline 0808 8020 133 to talk (or webchat) in more detail to an Advisor about your options and places of further support such as the relationship charity Relate. You can find free professional support from people who understand how complex a problem with gambling can bring to relationships and will be non-judgmental. You can access this support even if your partner does not feel ready to access support for themselves yet.
Wishing you the best,
Louise,
Forum Admin
I truely hope you’re partner can forgive you for cheating on him. Gambling can destroy relationships in so many ways so it’s understandable that you feel lost but I am hopefully you can both pull together relationship wise.
moving onto the real problem and that’s the gambling, I believe if he goes to a GA meeting and attempts some sort of recovery either digitally or physically and wants to actually stop then you both have a chance to work things through.
it’s not a easy ride and there are no guarantees but I hope he seeks help so you can both help yourselves.
dave101
https://www.relate.org.uk/what-we-do/counselling/relationship-counselling for relationship help potentially, my partner told me to add this x
Thank you for your advice. Anything is worth a shot. I’m just hoping he is on the same page as me.
No problem just @ me if you need anymore help @dave101. Good luck and take care x
After nearly 3 years of putting up with my partners mood swings, lack of money, lies, and lack of motivation or interest, he has admitted he was gambling and is in debt. Unfortunately before this came out I cheated on him with an ex as I was just so lost and confused. I can’t get over the fact I am going to have to try and support our family on my part time wages and my savings, he can’t deal with the fact I strayed due to his behaviour. We have 2 small babies, I’m lost.
I'm really sorry to hear about the time you're going through in your relationship, with the added stress of financial difficulties and having two young children. It's definitely an emotional situation. Just remember that you don't have to figure everything out all at once. Take things step by step. Reach out for help from professionals, friends and family members. I know it's not easy. With the support and resources you can navigate these challenges and make decisions that are best, for both you and your children.
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
